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Have You Ever Heard Zombie Turkeys? Audio Excerpts!

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Zombie Turkeys front cover. Click to get a your excerpt!

Have You Ever Heard Zombie Turkeys? I’ve got audio excerpts and written excerpts for you.

Why am I telling you? I’m giving away free copies of Zombie Turkeys on September 1st & 2nd, 2024. Click here to claim yours.

First, I’ve got written Zombie Turkeys excerpts for you.

The first excerpt I ever published on my blog is here, from November 18, 2016.

But maybe a section of Chapter 1 doesn’t satisfy you.

You can always click and go to Amazon and get your chance to read free online. You can read into chapter 2 at Amazon.  If you have Kindle, you can read the whole book for free. Or you can buy the ebook for .99.  You can get the paperback here on Amazon, or on this very website. I’ll give you free shipping too!

You can also listen to the audio sample at Amazon or Audible .

If you subscribe to Audible, you can read Zombie Turkeys or My Undead Mother-in-law for free.  To subscribe, click the US link. the UK link,  or the DE link. Did you even know I have a DE (Deutche, German) website?

Have You Ever Heard Zombie Turkeys Excerpts!

You can’t forget these four audio excerpts, read by yours truly, Andy Zach. First:

Next you have this one:


Then there’s the third excerpt:

Finally you have the fourth and last video here:

Have You Ever Heard Zombie Turkeys Excerpts? Professional Version!

Have You Ever Heard Zombie
Have You Ever Heard Zombie Turkeys

I hired professional voice actors Phil Blechman and Raven Perez for Zombie Turkeys audiobook. Listen here: Zombie Turkeys audio

What do you think? Leave a comment or send me a note by clicking here.

Have You Ever Heard Zombie Reviews?

While I was busy running writing books, my beloved book fans were writing book reviews.

Here’s one:

Sep 11, 2018

Lirio Marchito rated it liked it

I received a free copy of this book in return for an honest review.

Apart from being called a zombie in the office, because I used to work too long till my eyes turned red and legs felt so tired they often moved like a dead-man-walking, I have never had much proximity to zombies or zombie-hero-stories. I have watched a few movies where zombies were always portrayed as creepy and villainous. So I always associated them with the gory horror films or novels. Having always read only the stereotyped versions of a zombie, Andy Zach’s fun and humorous take on zombies came as a laughter riot to me.

Diane Newby, ‘the undead mother-in-law’ reminded me of many minority rights activists in my country, but unlike them, she is strong- physically and mentally, doesn’t victimize herself but is a true, witty heroine. She became a zombie by accident but instead of looking at it with terror or grief; she learns to enjoy the fun and positive aspects of it: being dead-proof, aging-proof, and disease-proof! She fights against the stigma associated with ‘zombification’ and advocates the use of zombie blood to cure elderly and disabled people. She is not alone in her pursuits but is helped by her husband George, son Don and his wife Maggie (also zombies). Through her son-in-law Ron Yardley’s blog she is introduced to Sam and Lisa Melvin, editors of Midley Beacon, a one-stop online newspaper for zombie news. Through them, she is taken to the battle fronts to fight national catastrophes like zombie turkeys, corgis etc.

First Review Second Part


Apart from the fun narration of an unlikely-to-ever-happen-story, I also enjoyed some other aspects of this book. One was the clever use of excerpts from Ron Yardley’s blog in the narration. It worked really well for striking home a point or an emotion. I also enjoyed the antagonist and his versatile use of latest technology weapons, whether it is cyborgs, controlling chips or hyperloops. I also loved the references to real life people like Elon Musk, Obamas or Trump.

I wish the author good luck with all his works.  Interested readers can find out more about the author and his books at andyzach.net Happy reading 

New Reviews Third Part

And here’s the next:

“The book cover is perfect! The story is a creative, funny & unique parody of the “zombie” genre. Don’t read it if you have no sense of humor or hate zombie books. I wasn’t rolling on the floor laughing, but definitely giggling in places in between some good action scenes. If you like Mel Brooks or Monty Python movies, you probably have the right sense of humor for this book.”

Next, for a chuckle, try this cartoon.


One More Thing . . .

It’s not a Free Zombie Turkeys Excerpt, but it’s free! Get some free audiobooks from my newletter! Click here for free audiobooks.

Finally, there’s this image:

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Get Your Free Zombie Turkeys Book – 3 Days Only!

3 Days Only I have Zombie Turkeys book for free.  Here it is. Click the clock or lose your Free Zombie Turkeys book.

Try a free sample of Zombie Turkeys read by me, Andy Zach.

Andy Zach interview and Zombie Turkeys reading

Besides Free Zombie Turkeys Book (3 Days Only) Do You Have Any Other Free Books?

You bet! Every week I send out my newsletter with free fantasy book offers. I don’t guarantee they’re as good as Zombie Turkeys or My Undead Mother-in-law, but they’re free. Click here, enter your email, and you’ll get some this week.

But that’s not all! Once you join the newsletter, your email is placed in a monthly drawing for your pick of any of my products: Zombie Turkeys, My Undead Mother-in-law, Zombie Turkeys audio book, and Zombie Turkeys Graphic Novel.

My Undead Mother-in-law Breaking News (NOT 3 Days Only)

The mother-in-law has landed! That is, her book, My Undead Mother-in-law (M.U.M.) has arrived at Jule Inc. Those who’ve won free books (four) and who’ve picked M.U.M. will get one. Those who haven’t picked a prize yet, contact me, Andy Zach.

Or you can just go to Amazon and get it for $2.99. Click here.

Get your M.U.M! Click here!
3 days only
Get your M.U.M! Click here!

Got Any More Books?

Indeedy do! The third book in the Life After Life Chronicles, my humorous zombie books set in our modern society has the working title Paranormal Privateers. 

Research topics I covered for the next book were Somali piracy and letters of marque. Did you know the last letter of marque was issued in 1815 for the ship the Grand Turk, to be used against the Barbary pirates? It was never used since the second Barbary pirate war ended.

Free Zombie Turkeys book
3 Days Only
Color picture of US 16th President Lincoln. He almost issued a letter of marque.

Then later on President Lincoln thought of using them against the Confederacy but didn’t. The Confederacy, however, issued letters of marque against the Union.

Finally, Ron Paul introduced bills for letters of marque against Al-Qaida in 2001 and 2007. In 2010, a Navy lawyer researched the plausibility of letters of marque against modern pirates and concluded it was a good idea.

Free Zombie Turkeys Book
3 Days Only
Andy’s autographed picture

What do you think? Respond in the comments or by email to [email protected].

Or, simply click here to reach me.

Signing off,

Andy

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Origin Story of Zombie Turkeys!

Origin Story of Zombie Turkeys–where did they come from? How can they be stopped? I tell you all!

But let’s begin with your gift: you can get your free copy of Zombie Turkeys–and some giggles. Click here for yours!

Zombie Turkeys was the first book I wrote and published. I wanted to write something light and funny. I fried a turkey, brought it into the house, and said, “What if this turkey came back to life?” Someone said, “It’d be a zombie turkey.”

“That’s my book title!” So I wrote the book around the title.

Zombie Turkeys Reviews
Advent Day 12
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So let’s quickly get you your copy: click here to get Zombie Turkeys. Here’s how it works:

When you subscribe to my newsletter, in EVERY newsletter I offer to give away a free ebook copy of Zombie Turkeys. So subscribe, get a newsletter, and grab your book

But that’s not all you’ll get in this blog post.

Origin Story – Zombie Turkeys – Review

Advent Day 12
Origin Story
Chapter 3 icon

Firstly, where’s this review coming from? Goodreads!
S. Policar

Author 24 books

134 followers

November 20, 2023

If you’ve seen Poultrtgeist: Night of the Chicken Dead or Thankskilling and liked them, you’ll LOVE this. The sarcasm is there, the humor is dark and twisted, and our killer Tom turkey wakes up every day feeling great and ready to see who he can kill in the state of Illinois with his massive flock of wild and domesticated zombie turkeys.
I loved this book. The end is a bit predictable given the fact that it’s a series, but its definitely the predictable you’d expect from something like this. I think this book would make a great low budget movie like the two I mentioned earlier; and let’s be realistic, thanksgiving is a pretty much open holiday in the book and movie business.

I give this book 4 of 5 Paws and I look forward to reading the rest of this series.

Origin Story – Unique Review – 2

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Advent Day 12
Origin Story
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5.0 out of 5 stars 

A very fun, very funny read.

Reviewed in the United States on March 16, 2018

I loved every gobbling, clucking page of this book. It’s this hilarious and insane story that wonderfully hits all the right zombie outbreak tropes I love, but done with turkeys and thanksgiving themes. SO FUNNY! I could read about heroic turkey farmers making chipper-shredder last stands for just about forever.

The main dude, Mr. Unknown Blogger, was also a very likable and fun main character to ride around with. I loved reading about this bottom-of-the-pile reporter turning his life around even while the hordes of zombie turkeys get worse and worse.

Just writing this review makes me want to read the book again. So much fun.

Origin Story – Audiobook – Review – 3

Deliciously silly book!

Advent Day 12
Origin Story

Icon for Chapter 5

What a deliciously silly book! If you love zombies and comedy, this zombiedy story is for you. The whole premise of zombie turkeys is just so ludicrous it makes the whole tale funny, no matter how seriously the characters take their roles. Story is suitable for the whole family. Very little blood & guts, no swearing, sweet, innocent romance.

I really enjoyed the main characters, Sam and Lisa, who work for a small newspaper in Illinois. Sam is out for the real story, thoroughly enjoying his investigative reporting. Lisa runs the little newspaper with efficiency and soon she has the entire nation demanding their news reports. Zombie turkeys are a bad problem, for sure, but they have launched this small newspaper right into the big leagues.

I loved all the straight line jokes, like how the turkeys couldn’t possibly outsmart law enforcement or the military. Yet people aren’t thinking like turkeys, let alone zombie turkeys. In order to predict their behavior, one must mindmeld with the zombie turkey!

Then there’s the weapons deployed to eradicate the turkeys – flechettes, flame throwers, big knives, grenades, etc. The story takes every opportunity to poke fun at being over-prepared… for the wrong things. Yet, no one could possibly see zombie turkeys coming, right? The story ends with one final piece of investigative journalism which just might explain where these deadly birds came from. So looking forward to book 2! 5/5 stars.

Tell Me What you Think!

What next? Get your free copy of Zombie Turkeys here!

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

You can get an autographed copy of Zombie Turkeys directly from me by clicking here. Free shipping and I pay the sales tax.

Or you can get Zombie Turkeys on Amazon for .99 or 12.95. ($2.99 if you don’t get it right away.)

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here. You also get my audiobooks for free!

Psst! Audible lets you listen free to my books. Click here to find out how.