Paranormal Privateers Archives – Page 9 of 15

Posted on March 16, 2023March 16, 2023 by admin

Best March 2023 Reviews and Discounted Books

Best March 2023 Reviews – I’m writing my first fantasy book this year, so I went back to one of my big influences, Terry Prachett in my first review.

If you’re just looking for discounted books, go here. You’ll get my audiobooks for free and other books discounted with every newsletter.

Best March 2023 Reviews > Sourcery

Once again, Terry Pratchett dazzles with a brilliant combination of humor, fantasy, and amazing description. I very literally laughed out loud four or five times while reading this book for the second time.

The inept wizard Rincewind is the primary star in the book, but there are many colorful characters, such as Conina, the daughter of Cohen the Barbarian, with heroism in her blood. Death makes an appearance, along with the other Horsemen of the Apocalypse, who are occupied in surprising activities.

Finally, there is the antagonist/protagonist Coin who is the eighth son of an eighth son of an eighth son and that makes him a sourcerer–a source of magic and the source of the name of the book. He’s young, inexperienced, and more powerful than all the wizards combined.

No more description is needed. You will enjoy this book if you have a sense of humor
Andy Zach

Best March 2023 Reviews – A Cowboy Necromancer Book

March 3, 2023

A Challenging Continuation of the Series

Harmon Cooper does not disappoint! The Cowboy Necromancer Sterling Montero and his daughter The Sunflower Kid head west to see the ocean. The fact 90% of humanity has died due to an alien invasion and subsequent apocalypse doesn’t deter them. But they quickly meet challenges they never expected.

The novella ended with me wanting more. Some problems were resolved, but more remained.
Andy Zach
Author

Hilarious

Zombie Turkeys audiobook, click to get
Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

I’ve never laughed so much listening to a zombie story before…but then again I’ve never listened to a book about zombie turkeys before either. Hilariously written and actually has some great characters too. Many cameos as well. Definitely an awesome time listening to this one. Hoping for a sequel!

kixfan

Best March 2023 Reviews – A Half Demon Rebuilding Heaven

March 4, 2023

Author Harmon Cooper continues his action-packed series featuring Danzen a half-demon, half-human assassin. He got tired of the assassin business and retired and was immediately attacked by assassins. He dropped out of sight and was found by his fully demon brother, who was out to kill him as a potential rival to rule hell. His father, the ruler of hell, wants him to be his successor. His mother wants him to rebuild heaven, which fell to earth hundreds of years before.

That covers the first six books, aside from brutal battles with demons and monsters in every chapter. Danzen continues to gather the powerful remnants of heaven methodically. He has loyal friends and one who is more than a friend.

He has a choice–should he join up with hell-spawn to rebuild heaven? If not, his whole mission will fail and he will die.
Andy Zach

Do you have suggestions of books for me to read and review? Tell me all about them! If I read and review one you suggested, I’ll mention your name and give you a free book of your choice!

An action-packed adventure!

Click to get!

July Joy My Undead Mother-in-law — Review of My Undead Mother-in-law

Overall    5 out of 5 stars

Performance    5 out of 5 stars

Story    5 out of 5 stars

This series is the first I have read of Andy Zach’s and I am not disappointed! This story has tons of action, well written characters, and the zombies are not mindless slow shells. A refreshing take on zombies as a whole. The plot moves at a good pace and the story arc continues to work well over the series. I look forward to book 3! Audio Version: Phil Blechman and Raven Perez do a great job with their respective characters and the overall narration.
Nemesis

Free Books for you!

Here are your free audiobooks! Claim yours by clicking here! Which ones? Most of them!

First, I’ll cover my zombie turkey apocalypse parody, The Life After Life Chronicles.

Zombie Turkeys

Zombie Detective

Then we have:

My Undead Mother-in-law

Next is Paranormal Privateers Click to listen

After that, you’ve got Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse

Best Science Stories or Science Fiction More Good Things Best Book Reviews — Click to listen to free sample of Secret Supers.

Moving on to my teen superhero series, we have two audiobooks.

Secret Supers is available in Audible for free if you subscribe to Audible or if you’re from the United Kingdom.

2021 Reviews — Villain’s Vacation Audio book. Click to listen.

The next book in the series is Villain’s Vacation, the second of my three Secret Supers books.

Best March 2023 Reviews
Produce Your Audiobook

Finally, my third book, Secret Supers in Space, in coming out in audiobook this month. Watch this blog!

Click here to get an autographed copy now.

Click here to get an ebook or paperback from Amazon.

For all free audiobooks, click here to get them from me.

Posted on March 2, 2023March 2, 2023 by admin

Meet My Aliens from My SciFi Book

Meet My Aliens Juicy Details Chapter 14 icon

Meet my aliens from my SciFi book Paranormal Privateers. I’m author Andy Zach and I’ve got some aliens for you from this book.

Meet My Aliens
SciFi Fuel Paranormal Privateers — The cover of my third novel Paranormal Privateers. Click to get yours for .99 from March 5-12.

The situation: The aliens have just landed in a flying saucer on the White House lawn.

Now you’re ready for your free excerpt that follows below.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here.

Meet My Aliens: Paranormal Privateers

Chapter 9 – Washington DC

Flying saucer over Washington DC
Meet My Aliens — Flying saucer over Washington DC Chapter 9 icon from Paranormal Privateers

Sam and Lisa craned their necks with thousands of others as the saucer descended to the cleared area on the lawn. A hundred feet across, of smooth, unbroken silvery metal, it looked more like a lens than a saucer, with a smooth convex curved top and bottom. It floated silently as a balloon and landed like a snowflake.

“Look! It’s opening!” Sam said.

The edge of the saucer split, revealing a ramp to the interior. The alien ambassador Micah Rigby came out, holding both hands up in a gesture of peace. Tied to each of his wrists were silver strings, which pulled along two large red balloons. Hanging from the balloons were gaily wrapped packages.

“Greetings, Earthlings and my fellow Americans!” Micah Rigby spoke from the bottom of the ramp. Although he didn’t have a microphone, Sam and Lisa clearly heard him from a hundred feet away.

“The Old Ones send along two gifts for the President. We learned from Klaatu, who got shot for bearing a gift. I suggested the balloons and wrapping to show the gifts are not dangerous.”

“May I approach the president?”

“C’mon up, Ambassador Rigby!” boomed the President through the speakers.

Ambassador Rigby walked across the lawn and up the steps to the platform, balloons and presents bobbing merrily behind him.

“Here’s the Old Ones’ first gift for you.” He unwrapped the pink-and-yellow-striped package. It looked like a small silver phone. Micah handed it to the president and gave the balloon to the Secret Service agent next to the president. “You can give the balloon to your daughter, Agent Smith.”

Startled, the agent took the balloon.

Meet My Aliens from Paranormal Privateers

“Mr. President, this is a voice-activated cell phone. Simply speak the person’s name and you can see them and talk with them.”

“That’s like our cell phones.”

“The Old Ones copied the normal cell phone voice interface. However, the person you call does not have to have a phone at all! If you wish, your image can be projected to them.”

“Amazing!”

“Also, this phone is not limited by distance, nor can the signals be blocked. Finally, if you say ‘Old Ones,’ you can talk directly to them.”

“OK. Old Ones.”

Five translucent figures appeared near the president, all white-haired and bearded. One white, one black, one Asian, one Native American, and one brown race that might have been Middle Eastern.

“Greetings, Mr. President! How can we help you?”

“I wanted to see if you’d answer and what you looked like.”

“To be honest,” said the black one, “this is not how we look. These are merely our projected images. We use your races to show we are different to some extent like your races are different. White hair and beards symbolize our age.”

“What do you actually look like?” the President asked.

“We thought you might be curious,” said the Asian figure.

“That’s why we gave you the second gift,” said the Middle Eastern one.

“Here it is, Mr. President,” Micah said, handing him the larger orange-and-purple package.

The president unwrapped it and opened a sealed box. A cute furry caterpillar, with a head and face like a fox and long, furry pointed ears, quickly crawled out and up the president’s arm to his shoulder. It moved with a rippling motion. Squirrel-sized, it sat on his shoulder, licked his face, and purred contentedly.

Your Excerpt Concludes

“That tickles! You’re a cute little fellow, aren’t you? What are they called?”

“There are no equivalent species on earth, but we thought you might like them. They’re part of our ship’s ecology,” said the bearded white Old One. “You may call them anything you’d like, but we think they’re most like the Tribbles from Star Trek.”

“I can see that,” the president said.

“Minus the uncontrolled reproduction in the Star Trek episode!” The black Old One laughed. “These Tribble-like creatures must go back to the saucer each day for food. There are certain proteins they need they cannot get from your biosphere. We withhold the amino acids they need for reproduction.”

“They can eat harmful insects, flies, and mosquitoes, bed bugs, and cockroaches, but they cannot thrive or reproduce here,” added the brown Old One.

“So do you look like caterpillars, foxes, or Tribbles?” President Trump asked.

“It’s more of a metaphor than a literal appearance,” said the Caucasian.

“We want you to think of us as cute, warm, and fuzzy,” said the Asian.

“Will we ever get to see what you really look like?”

“It’s not necessary,” the five images answered in unison. “It has been pleasant talking with you, Mr. President. Our ambassador will discuss the trade arrangement we desire.”

The images disappeared.

My Aliens – What do you think?

What do you think of my aliens? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

If you like Paranormal Privateers, you can subscribe to my newsletter here to see all my blog posts and get free books every month. Or you can just stay at my blog, checking back every day until I post another blog.

Psst! Audible lets you listen free to my books. Click here to find out how.

Posted on February 16, 2023February 16, 2023 by admin

Best 2023 Reviews So Far and Discounted Books

Best 2023 Reviews So Far. I’ve been reading and writing in 2023. Read my reviews of books I’ve read and others reviews of books I’ve written. Then go and claim your free and discounted books from me.

I finished my most recent review the other day on Goodreads:

Best 2023 Andy Zach’s Reviews > The Color of Magic

Best 2023 Reviews
The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett

The Color of Magic (Discworld, #1; Rincewind, #1)
by Terry Pratchett

it was amazing 5 of 5 stars

bookshelves: fantasy, humor

I re-read this book for the fourth time, the second time since I became an author, and I love it even more!

This is the first book in Terry Pratchett’s Disk World series, so he sets up his magical system (magic is a color of light), his fantasy world (a flat world on the back of four elephants, standing on the back of a space turtle) and his characters (Rincewind, a magician with only one spell he can’t use. Cowardly and good at running away) (Twoflower, a classic tourist, with limitless chest of gold, no fear, and endless curiosity), (The Luggage, a suitcase with legs, mage of sapient pearwood, invulnerable and clever). And those three are merely the protagonists.

I won’t spoil any of the insane plot, but suffice it to say, Pratchett satirizes nearly every fantasy trope and many conventions of our current culture.

This fourth time around, I was writing my own fantasy novel/series and I looked at how Prattchett started out his series. It was a ripping good start, with unending action and interesting characters from the beginning. Who doesn’t like Death as an animated skeleton and a lugubrious voice?
Andy Zach‘s review

Best 2023 Reviews – Look What Someone Thinks Of …

This review appeared on Amazon this month.

Oops!: Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse (The Life After Life Chronicles)

(Click to get your autographed copy at a discount)

(Or you can click here to get Amazon copy)

(Finally, click here if you want a free ebook to review. Or email me at [email protected])

Can I have some more sir? This book is so good!

February 10, 2023

A Phoenix that cannot be tranquilized pickles injected with turkey DNA, a hamster that can read… This is just three of the great stories you get in this book.

It makes me wonder what does Andy Zak thinks while sitting around at his house he must have a vivid, vivid imagination! I’m just glad he shares his madness with the world.

I do want to say I didn’t read the last three stories because it said they were spoilers for his superhero books that I plan on reading next but I absolutely love the author six or seven stories in this anthology and highly recommend them.

Once again the narration was great the stories were entertaining and they had lots of LOL moments! I thoroughly enjoyed this authors books and cannot get enough. Please forgive any mistakes as I am blind and dictate my review.
Janalyn