Tag: Paranormal Privateers

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New Zombie Book Review and More Hot News from the Internet

New Zombie Book Review

New Zombie Book Review and More Hot News from the Internet

“Where’s my New Zombie Book Review ?” you ask. Right here! Author Wes Britton reviewed Paranormal Privateers, as he has Zombie Turkeys and My Undead Mother-in-law. Dr. Britton does another bang up job!

Without further ado, the New Zombie Book Review is next.

Wesley Britton’s Blog

August 6, 2018

New Zombie Book Review
Paranormal Privateers front  Click to get your copy!
Book Review: Paranormal Privateers: The Adventures of the Undead (Life After Life Volume 3) by Andy Zach
Paranormal Privateers: The Adventures of the Undead (Life After Life Volume 3) Andy Zach
Publisher: Jule Inc.; 1 edition (May 5, 2018)
Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
ASIN: B07CJP8FYP
https://www.amazon.com/Paranormal-Pri…Reviewed by Dr. Wesley Britton
Paranormal Privateers is my third go-around with author Andy Zack. First, I read his bizarre Zombie Turkeys (How an Unknown Blogger Fought Unkillable Turkeys) (2016). Next came My Undead Mother-In-Law (The Family Zombie with Anger Management Issues) (2017). As the titles suggest, Zack’s world of zombie animals and people aren’t meant to terrify readers. Instead, Zack is out to amuse and entertain us with the most unusual situations and scenes most of us will ever experience on the printed page.
Paranormal Privateers continues the weirdness with a handful of returning characters and the type of zombies few of us would want to kill, destroy, or dismember. They’re, for the most part, super-heroes with superior strength, resistance to diseases like cancer, and the ability to regenerate limbs and other body parts. These zombies don’t want to lose these abilities so they carry around vials of infected blood to make sure they have the means to become a zombie again in case somebody cures them.
This time around, a crew of zombies has a presidential commission and a super-yacht to take on missions the U.S. Military can’t. Their leader is the impatient Diane Newby, the “Undead Mother-in-Law” of the previous volume. She fiercely leads her comrades as they battle Somali pirates, Crimean human slavers, and London terrorists in Harrods department store with the aid of huge zombie bulls. (Talk about a bull in a china shop!)

New Zombie Book Review – Second Part

Then, a more serious scenario pulls together three storylines as the zombie team infiltrates a North Korean nuclear facility. One of these storylines centers on a North Korean defector who first becomes a zombie, then a Christian, and then he does his best to spread both in a prison camp.

Along the way, the heroic zombies and their human allies must suffer with the schemes of Sid Boffin, a 120-year-old criminal genius who wants to rule the earth and destroy all zombies with viruses carried on fly feet. Despite his efforts, Diane and her group fight on even after losing their zombie strength and regenerative abilities.

And then . . . we get an alien spaceship bringing powerful aliens to earth. It’s almost a completely different book from that point forward, beginning about 2/3 of the way in Paranormal Privateers.

All three volumes of the “Life After Life” series so far are fast-paced romps with minimal character development full of quirky humor and off-the-wall satire. While not billed as YA novels, I see no reason why young adults wouldn’t especially enjoy these yarns. There’s much about blogging, Skype, and other contemporary matters throughout all the adventures. How about a Kickstarter campaign to fund a cure for the anti-zombie virus? Political correctness? Say “paranormal people,” not “zombies.”

No reader needs to read the previous books to jump into the action, although it wouldn’t hurt to read My Undead Mother-in-Law first to get some character background. But all you need to get into the quirky world of Andy Zack is to have a healthy sense of humor and the willingness to travel to a world that never was and never will be.

This review first appeared at BookPleasures.com on Aug. 6, 2018.

Your Hot Internet News from Andy Zach

I cruise the whole internet every day so you don’t have to! Here’s your daily fun.

I love hard science fiction! That’s sci-fi that doesn’t violate any known physical laws. Generally, it extrapolates from current, known technology. Many of the great SF writers were hard science fiction masters. What do you think? Let me know the in the comments, or send me a personal reply here. Best response gets a free ebook!

I grew up in the 60s during the Space Race between the US and the USSR. I read Heinlein, Asimov and Arthur C. Clarke throughout grade school and I’m tickled to see some of the predictions coming to pass, such as commercial space flight.

From science fiction, we go to fantasy. How would you like to have scales?

I might get a set to endure harsh reviews!

Now this next story bridges the gap between science and fantasy:

Naturally, turkeys feature prominently in my book Zombie Turkeys. In that book, you’ll find both wild and domestic turkeys going zombie. This video gives you the actual science that wild turkeys are tougher than domestic ones.

Your Chance to Create a New Zombie Book Review

By that, I mean you can review my books for fun and profit. Fun, because that’s the way they’re written. Profit, because if you promise to review one, I’ll send you an ebook!

To help you in reviewing books, consider this article on character-driven versus plot driven books:


Do you like books that focus more on character development or books that focus on action? Or, like me, do you want both?  Please tell me in the comments, or send me nasty emails!

Finally, let’s finish as we began, with hard science fiction:

Next question, after reading the predictions above, is, do you agree? What do you think will happen in the next ten years? The next twenty? The next thirty? The best comment or email will then get a free ebook of your choice from me.

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Do You Want A Funny Novel @ 80% Off? Try Paranormal Privateers

Funny Novel

Do You Want A Funny Novel @ 80% Off? Try Paranormal Privateers by Andy Zach

Is Paranormal Privateers a Funny Novel? Try this sample:

A motion on the floor caught my eye as I sat on the bed. A cockroach crawled up the drain and onto the floor. Surprising. Usually, Britain kept their prisons pest free. Then another. And then a dozen more. Then hundreds.

This was not normal cockroach behavior. They do not come into the light in swarms. I sat cross-legged on the bed and watched the swarm with fascination. They each climbed the door, walked the steel perimeter, and went back down the drain, even as others went up.

Utterly curious, I nabbed one with my lightning reflexes before it descended. Examining it carefully, I saw a metal dot under its thorax and a narrow tube attached to its abdomen. A pungent, acidic smell came from the tube. I looked back to the door. A narrow trench had been eaten in the door’s perimeter, right where the cockroaches still marched. Near the ceiling light, I saw mist curl away from the door.

Modified and controlled cockroaches—that was like Vik Staskas’ cyborg controlled animals. I read his Ph.D. paper on the technology as well as the Midley Beacon’s de-classified reports on his battles with the zombies. Since Vik was dead, at the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico, this could only be one of my siblings or Papa Smith trying to rescue me.

New Novel Paranormal Privateers Excerpts – Part 2

Going back through my perfect memory of the twists and turns where they led me here hooded, counting my steps, and remembering the doors, I was confident I could retrace my steps.

The last of the cockroaches marched around the door, leaving its trail of acid. The steel was etched deep, perhaps a centimeter or more. Couldn’t be much left.

I knocked on the door. Yes, it felt like a centimeter thick, and it echoed like it was almost cut through. Then someone knocked back, much harder.

“I’m here!” I called. I assumed this was my rescuer.

“Step back,” grated a curious, tinny voice, like it was coming through a small radio.

I stepped away.

CLUMP! CLUMP! Two metallic thunks hit the other side of the door. Then, SKREERK! The door tore off like the lid of a tin of meat.

I didn’t expect what I saw. A male, silverback gorilla filled the doorway and the whole hallway beyond. Thick armor covered his body. Casually, he placed the door scrap against the hall.

“Follow me,” he said.

Want more? I have another excerpt here.

Or you can go big pig and go here to Amazon or here to CreateSpace for more free reading.

But why settle for excerpts when you can get the WHOLE BOOK for .99?

Funny Novel for .99 – Here’s How

First, click here:

Funny novel
Paranormal Privateers front small Click to get your copy!

Next, click “Buy” within 34 hours of 4 PM Eastern Daylight Time, Central Time, USA. You see, the sale is up for only 40 hours and 6 have already passed. Then the price goes up.

Finally, read and enjoy!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Other fun from around the Internet

I keep finding fun items. Here are a few more.

A Silent Movie Pianist Gives a Demo

Then there’s this bit of internet animated Flash history. Please reply to me or comment if you’ve never seen this before!

How can I top that video? By one of the greatest videos by one of the greatest parody artists of all time! See if you can keep from laughing at this next video.

Finally, I must say goodbye for now!

Andy Zach’s TombstoneAndy Zach's Tombstone

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First Draft Complete: Now What? Andy Zach Will Tell You!

Happy Mother's Day

First Draft Complete: Now What? Andy Zach Will Tell You!

Andy Zach here to tell you what to do when you achieve your book’s First Draft Complete stage. First of all, celebrate!

First Draft Complete
Chipmunks celebrating. They’re key characters in ‘My Undead Mother-in-law’. Click to learn more.

Take a day or two off! Go hunting zombie turkeys!

First Draft Complete
Zombie Turkeys fly to escape to Zombie Turkey hunters

But you say, “Andy! I want to publish my book! Can I just ship my first draft to a publisher or editor or agent?”

Of course you can do that! They’ll be happy to take your money! But on the off chance you want to sell your book, you need to do more work. That’s what this blog is about.

First Draft Complete: My Editing Steps

First, these are my steps I’ve borrowed from articles I’ve read. You’re different and may need to/want to do this differently. But these are my starting points for my second draft.

These are the actual steps I followed for my latest novel Paranormal Privateers.

First Draft Complete
Andy Zach’s ‘Paranormal Privateers’ cover. Click to order

Paranormal Privateer Edits: The First Three Steps

Don’t worry: I’ve deleted spoilers out of these notes. I plan my editing before I even start writing.

  1. Read through, noting problems – For me, these’ll be comments inserted in my Word document.
  2. Add missing scenes, if necessary – This step, well as the next two, depend upon having a scene chart, as documented in my earlier blog post.
  3. Delete/combine scenes, paragraphs – The goal here is to simplify and clarify for the reader what is happening and eliminate unnecessary words. I had 98,000 words after the first draft.

Paranormal Privateer Edits: The Next Three Steps

4.  Rewrite 1st POV into 3rd. – If you write only in 3rd person point of view “he said, she said”, you won’t need this step. But I wrote several characters from a first-person point of view.  I had too many first-person POVs, in fact, so I had to trim this down.  The narrative becomes too confusing and the reader’s focus can be diluted.

5. Review character arcs: Paranormal Privateers has eight protagonists, five antagonists, and minor characters:  You need to check character arcs, their entries and exits. Are they introduced properly? What happens to them during their scenes and afterward? Do they teleport between scenes? What happens to them?

6. Update timeline and scene chart, detailed scene flow. See here for more information on this important chart.  Ask yourself,  Is this scene really necessary? Do the scenes fit together on the overall timeline?

The Final Set of Edits

  1. Read the book out loud. I’ve found this is the best way to find awkwardly worded sentences. I also find logic errors and wrong words that I’ve used.
  2. Look for passive words: is, were, was, am, be, been. Combine this check with Grammarly Free Version to find spelling and grammar errors.
  3. Review adverb use. Search for “ly”. Adverbs should be used sparingly, like salt.
  4. Read aloud again
  5. Finally, send the manuscript to my editor, Dori Harrell

What’s Next?

Do you think this is all that’s necessary for the next great American novel?  Nope! The first half of the editing process is complete. Now you must work with your editor to perfect your novel.

That’s it for now!  Andy Zach, signing out!

First Draft Complete
Get Your Ridiculous On! Andy Zach