Posted on Leave a comment

Get Rare Excerpt from Paranormal Privateers

Science Fiction Story Fuel
Advent Day 19
Get Rare Excerpt
Chapter 9 icon of Paranormal Privateers

Get Rare Excerpt from Paranormal Privateers, my third zombie book in my Life After Life Chronicles.

“What’s so rare about them?” you may ask.

They’re so rare, I only published them once, seven years ago.

“Are they worth it?”

How do you feel about saving 80% on the book? Paranormal Privateers will be on sale from February 16th to 19th. Click here to grab your copy. But don’t wait. It goes up to $2.99 on February 19th. Then on the 23rd it goes back to the normal price of $5.99.

third zombie novel
Get Rare Excerpt
Zombie Turkeys audiobook cover. Click to get!

Don’t you like reading about sentient alien intelligence that is a Star Trek fan?

Most of you know my first book, Zombie Turkeys, now available in audiobook format:

Somewhat fewer of you know my second book, My Undead Mother-in-law, also available in audiobook format:

Quizzes, Questions
Try out my audiobook.

And still fewer know about my third zombie book, Paranormal Privateers.  get your book here.

Paranormal Privateers Status, my third zombie book

I had fun researching Washington DC’s geography, the layout and distances around the National Mall, and shaped explosive charges! 

Drop by weekly, or subscribe to my newsletter, and I’ll give you bi-monthly updates.

And Now Get Rare Excerpt

From Chapter 4 London, the first draft of  Paranormal Privateers, we find the paranormal privateers, George, Diane, Lulu, and Sharon, going incognito as undeclared zombies, quite against British law at the time. They’re using bloodhounds and zombie corgis to track down terrorists threatening London. Oh, and they have a truckload of zombie bulls.

Get Rare Excerpt Part 1

 

New Year New Book
Get Rare Excerpt
The Chapter 5 London chapter icon – what could it mean? Click and find out!

Scotland Yard met us the next morning when we docked in the port of London. We divided up into three groups to cover the area. Diane and I took everything between Grosvenor Place and Belgrave Place. Lulu and Sharon took the area from Belgrave to Basil. The Scotland Yard dog handlers Jerry Naismith and Benjamin Buxley took the wedge from Basil to Knightsbridge.

We jogged along, Diane and I. She had picked up the special two-wheel wheelchair, iBot, from Kamen industries office in London and loved tooling along at six miles per hour. Since we were in England maybe I should use the metric equivalent: ten kilometers per hour. I had no trouble keeping up with her, even as a deaf-mute. If people talked to me, I just handed them my deaf-mute card. The dogs, our two corgis, and two bloodhounds, also in service dog vests, loved it.

Then came a yell over our headsets. It was the Scotland yard crew, Jerry and Ben, both yelling.

“We’ve found them! The terrorists! They’re on the second floor of Harrods, in the tableware section!” said Jerry.

“We can’t get any closer! They’ve got tasers!” said Ben.

Get Rare Excerpt, part 2

Chapter 10 icon
Chapter 10 icon

“The hounds found C-4 in crockpots. When the sales clerks saw us they shot tasers at us!” Jerry continued.

“We would have been fried, but our kevlar vests stopped them,” added Ben.

“Now they’ve surrounded us in the ladies WC, taking shots at us,” Jerry interjected.

“We’re not far away!” said Lulu. “We’ll be right there!”

“George, we’re over a mile away, but we’re close to our truck, er, lorry holding the bulls and more corgis.”

I nodded. We had decided killer turkeys and the crowds of London were not a good combination. The turkeys remained on the yacht.

Diane jumped out of her wheelchair. “I’m breaking cover, you can too, George!” We ran to the truck, about two blocks away.

“Let me drive Diane,” I said.

“Of course. Left-hand drive scares me!”

Left-hand drive just required flipping all my US habits around. Look right first, then left. Keep left. I got the lorry out into traffic. We got into the traffic circle off Grosvenor.

“Look for Brampton exit,” I said.

We went all around the circle. No Brompton.

“Let’s try Chesham,” Diane suggested.

“We just passed it,” I said.

“What about Wilton?”

“You mean that last exit? We can’t go back to it now.”

“Here comes Belgrave again.”

“Let’s pull off,” I consulted the map on my cell phone. No map appeared for London. Rather, a popup said, “Directions disabled for London by order of the City of London. Please consult an official London cabbie.” I read aloud, incredulous.

Excerpt of third zombie book, part 3

The bulls bawled in the lorry. “There’s a taxi stand over there,” I pointed to Diane.

“I’m on it!” Diane leapt out of the lorry, ran across the busy traffic circle, accompanied by honking cars and talked with a cabby. She gave him some money and ran back.

“He’ll lead us to Harrods!”

I followed him out of the traffic circle. Then I heard in the headset, “Yow!”

Weekly World Internet News
Paranormal Privateers back cover – Click to get your preview

“Ay, caramba!” That was Lulu.

“What happened, Lulu?”

“Sharon caught a taser in the face. She’s down! It’s way more electricity than a regular taser. It can stop a zombie!”

“How are the Scotland Yard guys, Jerry and Ben?” I asked.

“We’re fine!” Jerry answered.

“After Lulu and Sharon attacked the clerks let us alone,” Ben added.

“Then we slipped down to the first floor,” Jerry said.

“That’s the second floor in US terminology,” Lulu said.

“So if the tableware is on the second floor, that’s the third?” I asked.

“Yes,” Lulu said.

“What’s your situation, Lulu?” I asked.

“I’m using a cutting board as a shield. When the taser hits it, I cut the wires with my katana.”

“Are they going to rush you? Where are you?”

“I don’t think so. One tried sneaking past me and I bowled him down by throwing a mixer at him. I’m guarding the exit to the dinnerware room. They can’t leave past me, but I can’t advance. I can’t leave Sharon anyway. How long until you get here?”

“We’ll be there in a couple of minutes.”

“We’ll need about ten more minutes,” said General MacGregor, who was in charge of the backup forces.

“Good! Double backup! Lulu, hang on, we’re bringing in the heavies!” Diane said.

Posted on

Get an unpublished excerpt from my third zombie book!

Happy Mother's Day

Get an unpublished excerpt from author Andy Zach’s third zombie book!

Yup, this is my way of letting you know my progress on Paranormal Privateers, the third zombie book in my Life After Life Chronicles.

third zombie novel
The Life After Life Chronicles phoenix

Most of you know my first book, Zombie Turkeys, now available in audiobook format:

third zombie novel
Zombie Turkeys audiobook cover. Click to get!

Somewhat fewer of you know my second book, My Undead Mother-in-law, also available in audiobook format:

third zombie book
Get your copy of My Undead Mother-in-law by clicking here!

And still fewer know about my third zombie book, Paranormal Privateers.  Here’s a summary, from my NaNoMo account:

Continue reading Get an unpublished excerpt from my third zombie book!

Posted on 1 Comment

Andy Zach Wins NaNoMo! Read All About It!

Andy Zach Wins NaNoMo

Andy Zach Wins NaNoMo!

Andy Zach Wins NaNoMo
Andy Zach contemplates his next novel.

Dear Andyzach.net blog readers,

It’s true. Andy Zach Wins NaNoMo! I’ve been away for blogging, slaving over a hot keyboard to write 50,000 words in November for NaNoMo, the National Novel Month contest where writers are challenged to write 50,000 words during the month of November. This is how I wrote Zombie Turkeys in November 2015 and My Undead Mother-in-law in November 2016. Both times I fell short of 50,000 words.  This November I made it and wrote 50,000 words!

Andy Zach Wins NaNoMo
Zombie Turkeys audiobook cover. Click to get!

But …

Andy Zach Wins NaNoMo: A Pyrrhic Victory

Why was it a pyrrhic victory?

Pyrrhic victory (/ˈpɪrɪk/ ( listen) PIRR-ik) is a victory that inflicts such a devastating toll on the victor that it is tantamount to defeat. Someone who wins a Pyrrhic victory has been victorious in some way, though the heavy toll negates a true sense of achievement or profit.

Related image
Death of General Warren at the Battle of Bunker Hill

What was my terrible loss?

Losing contact with you, my beloved blog readers.

Now, coming up next:

Let’s turn this terrible loss into a terrific gain for you.

How You Can Turn Defeat Into Victory for Your Gain

Simply contact me and get a free short story, A Phoenix Tale. It’s my never-before-told story of how I got my first pet phoenix.

You didn’t know I had five pet phoenixes at my home? Here’s my official bio:

With his first book, “Zombie Turkeys” Andy blazed new ground in paranormal humor. The second book in his Life After Life Chronicles, “My Undead Mother-in-law” is now on sale for Amazon Kindle and Createspace print edition. 

Andy Zach was born Anastasius Zacharias, in Greece. His parents were both zombies. Growing up, he loved animals of all kinds. After moving to the United States as a child, in high school, he won a science fair by bringing toads back from suspended animation. Before turning to fiction, Andy published his Ph.D. thesis “Methods of Revivification for Various Species of the Kingdom Animalia” in the prestigious JAPM, Journal of Paranormal Medicine. Andy, in addition to being the foremost expert on paranormal animals, enjoys breeding phoenixes. He lives in Illinois with his five phoenixes.

Andy Zach Wins NaNoMo
Andy Zach Author photo

 

 More Options to Get Free Comic Paranormal Animal Entertainment

First, you can email me at [email protected].

Second, you can like my page on Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/AndyZachAuthor/

Third, you can subscribe to my newsletter. I give away a free book every month, paperback, ebook, and now, an audiobook!

Finally, you can leave a comment on this blog post!  I really want them!