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Get Your Free Laughter with Zombie Turkeys–2 Days Only

Get Your Free Laughter with Zombie Turkeys–2 Days Only. That’s today and tomorrow on Amazon and Story Origin, April 7th! That’s just 48 hours, so quickly click here to get Zombie Turkeys. The free book offer ends on Thursday April 8th, eclipse day.

Best Science Stories Zombie Turkeys Gift
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Get your Zombie Turkeys here. You get a bushel of laughter with each book.

I’m author Andy Zach and I’ve got another book on sale as well! It’s my most recent book, Zombie Detective. This one is 67% off its Kindle price. It’s on sale below.

For more free and discount books, join my newsletter here.

Eclipse from space. Click for Zombie Turkeys.

Why is my Zombie Turkeys book free?

Tomorrow is an eclipse in my hometown of Cleveland! Why not?

Let me tell you about Zombie Turkeys:

Sam Melvin, an underachieving e-reporter from a small town, changes forever when he meets turkeys that won’t stay dead. You can shoot ’em, chop ’em, burn ’em—they come back stronger. The undead plague of poultry spreads uncontrollably, rocking the whole country. As Sam tracks down the zombie turkeys and how to eradicate them, his editor, Lisa Kambacher, nags him to turn his stories and expenses in on time. During their years of working together, Lisa has mellowed into an irascible pinchpenny. Lisa snipes at Sam for plebeian writing but uses her intelligence to pursue the lucrative carnivorous turkey story.

Sam and Lisa ricochet across the landscape, tracking turkeys and fleeing the bloodthirsty hordes. Careening from shell-shocked grocery store owners fighting turkeys crawling out of refrigerators to machine-gunning turkey farmers to secret militia, Sam and Lisa doggedly report.

Throughout the turkey apocalypse, they dare ravaged cities, plow knee-deep in gore and corpses, and upload streams of zombie turkey video news to the world. With paranoid militias clashing with the federal government and unkillable turkeys, Sam and Lisa doubt their ability to survive.

Sam and Lisa have no superpowers. If you have a heart condition or lack humor, you should not read Zombie Turkeys, no matter how much you want to find out what happens.

Zombie Turkeys

Get Your Free Laughter – A Reader’s Review of Zombie Turkeys

This book was a crazy ride.

Tony Fecteau

1,256 reviews

5 followers

January 5, 2024

This book was a crazy ride. Imaging if you will a flock of turkeys which are unstoppable! Of course, they can be stopped if you know the secret way to kill a zombie turkey. The various scenes had me laughing. The scene with Obama and family was quite entertaining. The various traps and way to kill the turkeys had my imagination going. A fun read.

Get Your Free Laughter with Zombie Turkeys

Readers’ reviews from Audible:

You won’t look at turkeys the same way as before

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OK this was funny, I actually started with volume 2 in this series (My undead mother in law) and all the things that I was missing in the story in the one I started are explained here, its brilliant and very funny XD, one thing that I love about this series, the people reading the book (there’s more than one ^__^) they actually sound like they’re having fun, and that’s twice the fun for us that are listening to the audiobook.

Hilarious

I’ve never laughed so much listening to a zombie story before…but then again I’ve never listened to a book about zombie turkeys before either. Hilariously written and actually has some great characters too. Many cameos as well. Definitely an awesome time listening to this one. Hoping for a sequel!

Funny

Get Your Free Copy of Zombie Turkeys

What added to the Zombie Turkey situation was the author took the reader through the different towns of Illinois by a reporter working on his big story added great humor to the saga. The reader has to wonder how Mr Zach dreams up these crazy stories but they all seem to work.

Dumb…silly…juvenile…couldn’t put it down

Comfort food for that juvenile part of you that never quite outgrew your comic books. Just forget that it’s preposterous (after all, you were already warned by the title; what did you expect?), and go with the flow…

Zombie Turkeys

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it’s part outrageously funny, bizarre and compelling. A very good and entertaining and riveting story.

Zombie Turkeys 🦃

This was an amazing story. It was very entertaining with many LOL moments. I’m definitely hooked. Can’t wait to listen to the next one.

Deliciously silly book!

What a deliciously silly book! If you love zombies and comedy, this zombiedy story is for you. The whole premise of zombie turkeys is just so ludicrous it makes the whole tale funny, no matter how seriously the characters take their roles. Story is suitable for the whole family. Very little blood & guts, no swearing, sweet, innocent romance.

Dark Humor

This dark comedy combines action and humor set mostly against the back drop of rural Indiana. Sam and his editor Lisa run a small town newspaper, 

Get your free copy of Zombie Turkeys here!

Get Your Free Laughter – Tell Me What You Think!

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

You can get an autographed copy of Zombie Turkeys and/or Zombie Detective directly from me by clicking here. Free shipping and I pay the sales tax.

Or you can get Zombie Detective on Amazon for .99 or 12.95. ($2.99 if you don’t get it right away.)

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here. You also get all my audiobooks for free!

Psst! Audible lets you listen free to my books. Click here to find out how.

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Free Zombie Detective Excerpt – Why?

Your Thirteenth Literary Gift Andy Zach Newsletter Zombie Detective Audiobook

Free Zombie Detective Excerpt is here. But why am I giving you this? Because this week, April 7-14, my book is on sale for .99. Get your copy here right now! Clickety-click! Enjoy!

P.S. I give away free books for any comments on the excerpt. Just click here.

Chapter 1 – Laid Off

From Zombie Detective, by Andy Zach
Your Thirteenth Literary Gift

“Sam, you’re fired.” Lisa’s green eyes met his brown ones.

“What? Lisa, you and I have worked together at the Midley Beacon for ten years! And we’ve known each other for fifteen!  And we’ve been married almost two months!”   

“Sorry Sam. Romance has to take a back seat to finances. Ever since the bottom dropped out of the zombie turkey news market since the first of the year, the Midley Beacon hasn’t made enough to pay your salary.”

“But that’s our salary. We share and share alike.”

“We can still live on my salary. And you can apply for unemployment, now that you’re fired.”  

“But what’ll I do all day? I can only play Fortnight for so long.”

“What did you do before I hired you, ten years ago? What did you do while I was in college?”

“Uh, mow lawns. Handyman repair. Stuff like that. But I’m a grown man now. I want more.”

“Hmm, you are a decent reporter.”

“Thanks Lisa. That’s high praise from you.”

“Well it’s the truth. You’ve grown from a crappy reporter, like 99% of all reporters, to well above average. I did lay off everyone else on the staff before you, you know.”

Free Zombie Detective Excerpt – Part 2

Your Thirteenth Literary Gift Andy Zach Newsletter Zombie Detective Audiobook
Audiobook cover – click to listen.

“Aw, you’re making me feel warm and mushy.”

“That’s part of good management, emotional manipulation.”

“Uh, you mean you don’t mean it?”

“Nah, I mean it. Emotional manipulation is much more effective if you’re sincere.  Say, why don’t you call Andy Zach and see if he has some royalties to share. We signed a contract with him to get half the royalties from his book Zombie Turkeys. We supplied more than half his source material right from the pages of the Midley Beacon.”

“I just called him yesterday. His sales haven’t paid for the cover yet, let alone the editing.”

“I told him to go with traditional publishing!”

“He’d still be trying to get an agent, let alone publishing his book. Who wants to represent a zombie turkey author?”

“So think of something to do with your reporting and investigative skills. That’s your first job. Get out of here and work on it at home. When I come home tonight, I want a decision from you. That’s a deadline.”

“Ok, Lisa. And thanks. You know I work best under a deadline.”

“Sure dear. We’ll go out for dinner tonight to celebrate your new career, whatever it will be.”

“I’m kind of tired of McDonalds.”

“We’ll spurge. We’ll go to the big city of Peoria. Maybe to the Country Time Buffet.”

“Wow. Thanks, Lisa.”

“Now, shoo! Don’t forget to clear out your desk.”

From Zombie Detective, by Andy Zach

Free Zombie Detective Excerpt – Still more goodies!

If you like these kinds of excerpts, subscribe here, if you haven’t already. As a subscriber, you can get my audiobooks for free.

You can listen to my audiobook for free here.

You can grab an autographed copy of my book by clicking here.

Check out these reviews!

Not a typical zombie story!

  • Overall    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story    5 out of 5 stars

Listener received this title free

Based on the title and the cover, I originally thought the detective was going to be a zombie back in the 30s or 40s. That wasn’t the case, but it was still a hilarious amateur detective story and I loved the absurdity of it all.

It’s a short read (or listen, since I listened to the audiobook), but is packed with Sam in crazy situations with all sorts of zombies. His string of good luck is as unlikely as the conundrums he finds himself involved in, but somehow it works for him.

Phil Blechman was the perfect choice for Sam’s character. Lauren Testerman did a great job channeling Lisa, the poor woman who has to manage Sam and all his antics.

I Love Andy Zach’s Books!

  • Overall    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story    5 out of 5 stars

Listener received this title free

I wasn’t quite sure where this book was going when it started but as it kept going I understood where it fit in the timeline. . . It was a great book. I laughed several times. Now that I’ve finished this one, I’m going to have to read my Undead Mother-In-Law again.

Andy Zach

Andy Zach in repose
Free Zombie Detective Excerpt
Andy Zach in repose
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Get My Latest Book Autographed – Just Launched Here’s How

Disabled Superheroes

Get My Latest Book Autographed – Just Launched Here’s How. You can be just like in person at a book convention, walking up to the table.

Here’s my latest book!

Get My Latest Book Autographed

What’s it about?

The Book of Revelation is mysterious to many, but if you use this daily devotional, you can understand it like never before.

Each day you’ll have one small verse to read and reflect upon. You will see connections and meanings you’ve never seen before.

Author Jeffry Smith asks provocative questions to help you think about each portion of scripture. He also supplies useful cross-references which give further insight to the scripture.

Begin your journey of inspiration now, with the Revelation Devotional.

Click here to grab your autographed copy!

What is this site? It’s my Square site. What’s that? It’s my OFFICIAL SALES website. I sell you my autographed books at LESS than Amazon AND include free shipping.

How can I do that? I cut out Amazon.

Amazon takes a 30% commission on each sale. It then deducts the printing cost of each book. That leaves me with 30% of your money.

But Square takes a 1% commission. I get most of your money even though you are paying less. That lets me:

  1. Pay for shipping for you
  2. And then pay for taxes for you
  3. Finally I pay for printing the book for you

Get My Latest Book Autographed – The Story Behind the Book

Jeffry Smith author picture
Get My Latest Book Autographed

So how did a fiction author, Andy Zach, end up writing a non-fiction book about the most mysterious book in the Bible under the name Jeffry Smith?

First, the book Revelation always fascinated me When I read the Bible for the first time, I read the book of Revelation first, because I’d heard how mysterious and hard to understand it was.

I read it and there were a lot of things I didn’t understand, but I did understand that God wins in the end.

Over ten years later, after reading many interpretations of the book, I decided to see exactly what it said. I went through it verse by verse and wrote down every statement it made. Here’s Revelation 1:1 for example:

The revelation from Jesus Christ, which God gave him to show his servants what must soon take place. He made it known by sending his angel to his servant John,

Revelation 1:1

The statements I found in this verse are:

  • The book of Revelation is from Jesus Christ
  • God (the Father) gave Jesus this revelation
  • Why was it given? To show Jesus’s servants what must soon take place.
  • How did this revelation come to John? Jesus sent it by His angel.

Revelation has many other verses this densely packed with information.

Get My Latest Book Autographed – The Story Behind the Book Part 2

So how did this study go from a personal Bible study to a published devotional?

Revelation Devotional back cover
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The Revelation Devotional back cover

After I completed the study, it lay in its handwritten version for years. Then I typed it up on my computer, where it resided for more years. Then I decided to make it into a class about Revelation.

I decided I would skip any interpretation and just teach what the book said. That became an eight week class of hour and a half sessions, going through all twenty two chapters.

Teaching the class at my church and then at Bradley University helped me refine it.

My students demanded another book of Revelation class covering the interpretation of its symbols.

So I created a class covering all the symbols in the book, showing how they were used elsewhere in the Bible

Get My Latest Book Autographed – The Story Behind the Book Part 3

Gospel Medley Writer's Block: My Experience
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The Gospel Medley cover. Click to get

By this time I was pretty familiar with the book of Revelation, forty years after I started studying it. How’d it become a book?

Publishing my first Bible help, The Gospel Medley, encouraged me to try writing a The Revelation Devotional. Reading Timothy Keller’s The Songs of Jesus devotional about the book of Psalms inspired me. Also, one of my friends, Leslie McKee, also wrote a devotional, Hope Amid the Pain. She also edited my book.

Note that I use a different name for my two Bible help books, Jeffry Smith. That’s my non-fiction name. Andy Zach is my fiction name.

We look a lot alike.

But Wait! There’s More!

Meme alert!

I just had a birthday, but I’m not done writing.

You can get all my books, fiction and non-fiction by clicking at my Square site.

But, you can also get ebooks at my Amazon pages. Click here for fiction by Andy Zach. Click here for non-fiction by Jeffry Smith. You can also see how much more my paperbacks cost on Amazon than on my site.

Finally, all my fiction books are available on Audible. Click here to get your copies from my audiobook page. My wife assures me my books are funnier read aloud.

Or, you can get my audiobooks free with a subscription to my newsletter by clicking here.

Say–which of my books have you read? Which one do you want next? Let me know and I’ll give you a free ebook.

Lastly, Learn More About My First Non-Fiction Book

Hold on to your chair! This book will rock your world.

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The four gospels in chronological order, word by word

Here is what this book is all about:

Are you curious about Jesus Christ? Do you struggle to understand the Bible? The Gospel Medley includes the four Gospels in a single narrative, faithfully pulling the text from the World English Bible. You are now able to read all the gospel as a single, easy-to-read story.

Each Gospel describes Jesus’s life from a different point of view with different details and insights. The Gospel Medley combines every word into a single perspective with all details and events arranged chronologically.

Unlike other harmonies, The Gospel Medley doesn’t put the four gospels in columns or rows. Instead, the text is integrated word by word into a smoothly flowing narrative. Further, each paragraph references the four gospels so you can read the original citations. You also get footnotes of all the quotes from the Old Testament, giving you the context of Jesus’s words.

For a unique perspective of the four gospels, read ‘The Gospel Medley’ today.

The Gospel Medley on Square