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Have You Ever Heard Zombie Turkeys? Audio Excerpts!

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Get Your Zombie Turkeys Laughter
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Zombie Turkeys front cover. Click to get a your excerpt!

Have You Ever Heard Zombie Turkeys? I’ve got audio excerpts and written excerpts for you.

Why am I telling you? I’m giving away free copies of Zombie Turkeys on September 1st & 2nd, 2024. Click here to claim yours.

First, I’ve got written Zombie Turkeys excerpts for you.

The first excerpt I ever published on my blog is here, from November 18, 2016.

But maybe a section of Chapter 1 doesn’t satisfy you.

You can always click and go to Amazon and get your chance to read free online. You can read into chapter 2 at Amazon.  If you have Kindle, you can read the whole book for free. Or you can buy the ebook for .99.  You can get the paperback here on Amazon, or on this very website. I’ll give you free shipping too!

You can also listen to the audio sample at Amazon or Audible .

If you subscribe to Audible, you can read Zombie Turkeys or My Undead Mother-in-law for free.  To subscribe, click the US link. the UK link,  or the DE link. Did you even know I have a DE (Deutche, German) website?

Have You Ever Heard Zombie Turkeys Excerpts!

You can’t forget these four audio excerpts, read by yours truly, Andy Zach. First:

Next you have this one:


Then there’s the third excerpt:

Finally you have the fourth and last video here:

Have You Ever Heard Zombie Turkeys Excerpts? Professional Version!

Have You Ever Heard Zombie
Have You Ever Heard Zombie Turkeys

I hired professional voice actors Phil Blechman and Raven Perez for Zombie Turkeys audiobook. Listen here: Zombie Turkeys audio

What do you think? Leave a comment or send me a note by clicking here.

Have You Ever Heard Zombie Reviews?

While I was busy running writing books, my beloved book fans were writing book reviews.

Here’s one:

Sep 11, 2018

Lirio Marchito rated it liked it

I received a free copy of this book in return for an honest review.

Apart from being called a zombie in the office, because I used to work too long till my eyes turned red and legs felt so tired they often moved like a dead-man-walking, I have never had much proximity to zombies or zombie-hero-stories. I have watched a few movies where zombies were always portrayed as creepy and villainous. So I always associated them with the gory horror films or novels. Having always read only the stereotyped versions of a zombie, Andy Zach’s fun and humorous take on zombies came as a laughter riot to me.

Diane Newby, ‘the undead mother-in-law’ reminded me of many minority rights activists in my country, but unlike them, she is strong- physically and mentally, doesn’t victimize herself but is a true, witty heroine. She became a zombie by accident but instead of looking at it with terror or grief; she learns to enjoy the fun and positive aspects of it: being dead-proof, aging-proof, and disease-proof! She fights against the stigma associated with ‘zombification’ and advocates the use of zombie blood to cure elderly and disabled people. She is not alone in her pursuits but is helped by her husband George, son Don and his wife Maggie (also zombies). Through her son-in-law Ron Yardley’s blog she is introduced to Sam and Lisa Melvin, editors of Midley Beacon, a one-stop online newspaper for zombie news. Through them, she is taken to the battle fronts to fight national catastrophes like zombie turkeys, corgis etc.

First Review Second Part


Apart from the fun narration of an unlikely-to-ever-happen-story, I also enjoyed some other aspects of this book. One was the clever use of excerpts from Ron Yardley’s blog in the narration. It worked really well for striking home a point or an emotion. I also enjoyed the antagonist and his versatile use of latest technology weapons, whether it is cyborgs, controlling chips or hyperloops. I also loved the references to real life people like Elon Musk, Obamas or Trump.

I wish the author good luck with all his works.  Interested readers can find out more about the author and his books at andyzach.net Happy reading 

New Reviews Third Part

And here’s the next:

“The book cover is perfect! The story is a creative, funny & unique parody of the “zombie” genre. Don’t read it if you have no sense of humor or hate zombie books. I wasn’t rolling on the floor laughing, but definitely giggling in places in between some good action scenes. If you like Mel Brooks or Monty Python movies, you probably have the right sense of humor for this book.”

Next, for a chuckle, try this cartoon.


One More Thing . . .

It’s not a Free Zombie Turkeys Excerpt, but it’s free! Get some free audiobooks from my newletter! Click here for free audiobooks.

Finally, there’s this image:

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Get My Latest Book Autographed – Just Launched Here’s How

Disabled Superheroes

Get My Latest Book Autographed – Just Launched Here’s How. You can be just like in person at a book convention, walking up to the table.

Here’s my latest book!

Get My Latest Book Autographed

What’s it about?

The Book of Revelation is mysterious to many, but if you use this daily devotional, you can understand it like never before.

Each day you’ll have one small verse to read and reflect upon. You will see connections and meanings you’ve never seen before.

Author Jeffry Smith asks provocative questions to help you think about each portion of scripture. He also supplies useful cross-references which give further insight to the scripture.

Begin your journey of inspiration now, with the Revelation Devotional.

Click here to grab your autographed copy!

What is this site? It’s my Square site. What’s that? It’s my OFFICIAL SALES website. I sell you my autographed books at LESS than Amazon AND include free shipping.

How can I do that? I cut out Amazon.

Amazon takes a 30% commission on each sale. It then deducts the printing cost of each book. That leaves me with 30% of your money.

But Square takes a 1% commission. I get most of your money even though you are paying less. That lets me:

  1. Pay for shipping for you
  2. And then pay for taxes for you
  3. Finally I pay for printing the book for you

Get My Latest Book Autographed – The Story Behind the Book

Jeffry Smith author picture
Get My Latest Book Autographed

So how did a fiction author, Andy Zach, end up writing a non-fiction book about the most mysterious book in the Bible under the name Jeffry Smith?

First, the book Revelation always fascinated me When I read the Bible for the first time, I read the book of Revelation first, because I’d heard how mysterious and hard to understand it was.

I read it and there were a lot of things I didn’t understand, but I did understand that God wins in the end.

Over ten years later, after reading many interpretations of the book, I decided to see exactly what it said. I went through it verse by verse and wrote down every statement it made. Here’s Revelation 1:1 for example:

The revelation from Jesus Christ, which God gave him to show his servants what must soon take place. He made it known by sending his angel to his servant John,

Revelation 1:1

The statements I found in this verse are:

  • The book of Revelation is from Jesus Christ
  • God (the Father) gave Jesus this revelation
  • Why was it given? To show Jesus’s servants what must soon take place.
  • How did this revelation come to John? Jesus sent it by His angel.

Revelation has many other verses this densely packed with information.

Get My Latest Book Autographed – The Story Behind the Book Part 2

So how did this study go from a personal Bible study to a published devotional?

Revelation Devotional back cover
Get My Latest Book Autographed
The Revelation Devotional back cover

After I completed the study, it lay in its handwritten version for years. Then I typed it up on my computer, where it resided for more years. Then I decided to make it into a class about Revelation.

I decided I would skip any interpretation and just teach what the book said. That became an eight week class of hour and a half sessions, going through all twenty two chapters.

Teaching the class at my church and then at Bradley University helped me refine it.

My students demanded another book of Revelation class covering the interpretation of its symbols.

So I created a class covering all the symbols in the book, showing how they were used elsewhere in the Bible

Get My Latest Book Autographed – The Story Behind the Book Part 3

Gospel Medley Writer's Block: My Experience
Get My Latest Book Autographed
The Gospel Medley cover. Click to get

By this time I was pretty familiar with the book of Revelation, forty years after I started studying it. How’d it become a book?

Publishing my first Bible help, The Gospel Medley, encouraged me to try writing a The Revelation Devotional. Reading Timothy Keller’s The Songs of Jesus devotional about the book of Psalms inspired me. Also, one of my friends, Leslie McKee, also wrote a devotional, Hope Amid the Pain. She also edited my book.

Note that I use a different name for my two Bible help books, Jeffry Smith. That’s my non-fiction name. Andy Zach is my fiction name.

We look a lot alike.

But Wait! There’s More!

Meme alert!

I just had a birthday, but I’m not done writing.

You can get all my books, fiction and non-fiction by clicking at my Square site.

But, you can also get ebooks at my Amazon pages. Click here for fiction by Andy Zach. Click here for non-fiction by Jeffry Smith. You can also see how much more my paperbacks cost on Amazon than on my site.

Finally, all my fiction books are available on Audible. Click here to get your copies from my audiobook page. My wife assures me my books are funnier read aloud.

Or, you can get my audiobooks free with a subscription to my newsletter by clicking here.

Say–which of my books have you read? Which one do you want next? Let me know and I’ll give you a free ebook.

Lastly, Learn More About My First Non-Fiction Book

Hold on to your chair! This book will rock your world.

Get Books Signed
The four gospels in chronological order, word by word

Here is what this book is all about:

Are you curious about Jesus Christ? Do you struggle to understand the Bible? The Gospel Medley includes the four Gospels in a single narrative, faithfully pulling the text from the World English Bible. You are now able to read all the gospel as a single, easy-to-read story.

Each Gospel describes Jesus’s life from a different point of view with different details and insights. The Gospel Medley combines every word into a single perspective with all details and events arranged chronologically.

Unlike other harmonies, The Gospel Medley doesn’t put the four gospels in columns or rows. Instead, the text is integrated word by word into a smoothly flowing narrative. Further, each paragraph references the four gospels so you can read the original citations. You also get footnotes of all the quotes from the Old Testament, giving you the context of Jesus’s words.

For a unique perspective of the four gospels, read ‘The Gospel Medley’ today.

The Gospel Medley on Square
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Happy Undead Mother-in-law Day–Or Valentine’s Day

Audiobook Listeners

“What’s ‘Happy Undead Mother-in-law Day? I know all about Valentine’s Day. That’s February 14th. What’s up with Happy Undead Mother-in-law?” you may ask.

Happy Undead Mother-in-law
My Undead Mother-in-law. Get it for your mother-in-law! Click here.

I’m glad you asked! It so happens My Undead Mother-in-law begins on Valentine’s Day. As the book opens, the family has dinner together, the undead zombies and the normal family members. Naturally, we celebrate it every year.

2023: My Undead Mother-in-law Free Excerpts

2021: What Audiobook Listeners Say About My Undead Mother-in-law

Here’s 2018’s celebration. 

All of 2017 was dedicated to My Undead Mother-in-law.

If you want to read all my posts on My Undead Mother-in-law, click here.

What’s that you say? You’d actually like to hear that scene? It so happens I’ve recorded myself reading it right here:

But maybe you want to read it yourself. No problem! I’ve got a free excerpt of chapter 1 right here for my faithful blog readers. Just drop me a note and I’ll send it to you.


Happy Undead Mother-in-law’s Day – You Can’t Afford a copy?

My Undead Mother-in-law icon chapter 8
My Undead Mother-in-law icon chapter 8

This is a common problem. You can’t afford the $17.95 for the audiobook version, the $12.95 for the print version, or even $2.99 for the ebook version. (PSST! It’s on sale for .99 this week until February 11)

Good news! I’m giving away a free audiobook at the end of this month. Sign up right now for my newsletter.

You can also read the book for free on Kindle or Audible.

As an added incentive you can get a signed copy from me for a mere $12! You can’t beat that with a stick, so click here now.

Finally, if you’re desperate, you can always do what I do when I want to read a book and not pay for it. Go to Amazon and click on the ‘Look Inside’ button and read random sections until you’ve read it all.

One more thing: here’s a Review

Why is this my favorite review? It’s from a professional author who doesn’t like zombie books, yet loved My Undead Mother-in-law..


Stephanie Barr

4.0 out of 5 stars

Not your standard zombie tale

December 28, 2018Format:

Kindle Edition

Verified Purchase

When I started to read this book, I was leery. As far as I know, I’m less interested in zombies than anyone on the planet. How could I give a reasonable review? Turns out, it wasn’t hard at all. I’ve said before and it turned out to be true here that, if you have a ridiculous premise that’s hard to swallow, run with it, normalize it, and readers /viewers will eventually accept. And it worked. The original premise of cognizant, virtually indestructible zombies was lobbed and backed until I was a believer, actively rooting for zombies. Plenty of (bloodier than average) action, some smiling, if not guffaw humor, a nice fulfilling story arc in an easy readable length made for a fun book (if bloody action doesn’t bother you) with charm that didn’t take itself to seriously but still capable of many a tender and touching moments.

I’m glad my prejudice didn’t keep me from enjoying this out-of-the-common-way story.

Happy Undead Mother-in-law’s Day – Now What’s Next?

What’s next? I loved Diane Newby, my Happy Undead Mother-in-law so much, I wrote another novel with her as the main character, Paranormal PrivateersI put Diane and her family on a superyacht and send them around the world as privateers fighting enemies of the US with a letter of Marquis from the President.

Here’s the cover:

SciFi Fuel Paranormal Privateers
The cover of my third novel Paranormal Privateers. Click to get yours.
Starting Paranormal Privateers
The Paranormal Privateers back cover. Click to get it.

But that’s not all! I’ve got the back cover for you, which I like even more:

.