Andyzach

Andy Zach’s writing takes flight in Secret Supers in Space, propelling disabled teen superheroes Jeremy, Aubrey, Dan, and Kayla into a cosmic summer adventure. Narrator Khai Lannor brings the characters’ energy and determination to life, making this audiobook an intergalactic joyride for fantasy fans of all ages. Buckle up and join the Secret Supers in their gravity-defying mission – this exhilarating journey is one you won’t want to miss!

Nemesis

Most children hate The dreaded assignment ‘what did you do in the summer holidays ‘

Author 2 books, 19 followers

June 26, 2023

I enjoyed this book. I have never been a space fan, so don’t know much about what goes into becoming an astronaut. That meant this book was a real eye opener and I got to do it with some great characters, who knows I might even be a fan of space now. I know the story is aimed at a younger generation but it was a lot of fun and each book I have listened to in this series has had an unusual plot, making it very different to the norm and that is before you find out that the four twelve year olds are disabled. The story isn’t that long but perfect for a trip into space (and a younger audience). Besides the author packs a lot into the story in an entertaining way that keeps you listening. I hope there are more adventures to come.
Julie Howard

Click Below to Get Your Copy!

Produce Your Audiobook — Secret Supers in Space audioboo k cover. Click to listen.

Any newsletter subscriber gets free audiobook codes–as long as they last. Click here to get yours. Don’t wait until they’re gone!

Do you want an autographed book? I’ll mail it directly to you with free shipping and I pay the taxes! C lick here to get yours. My shipping may not be the same day, but at least it’s free–for you.

Got questions? Comments? Reach me directly by clicking here. I’ll get back to you as quickly as I can.

Posted on March 16, 2024March 16, 2024 by admin — Leave a comment

Here’s a Good Plot from author Andy Zach–and You

Here’s a Good Plot from author Andy Zach–and You

“Wait! What do you mean? I just clicked here.”

I mean I have a ‘Developing Your Plot’ class I’m giving this month and I’ll share it with you. Here’s slide 1, below.

Good Plot – The Cast of Characters

First, there’s me, the teacher character, Andy Zach. If you’re not familiar with my biography on this site, you can go to Amazon or to Goodreads and find out about me and my books.

Then there’s you, one of many student characters. What have you written? Are you writing? What will you write? Please share you plot/novel/work ideas with me and the class by commenting below.

Comment here! I’ll send you my powerpoint class. Or email me at [email protected]

You MUST comment to participate in this class–or I’ll send the zombie turkeys after you!

A crowd of zombie turkeys, on Thanksgiving. Click to read more!

That’s my big turkey stick. The carrot is, I will give a free ebook of Zombie Turkeys to one of the commenters!

Start commenting – NOW!

Good Plot – Lessons – Where Will You go with Your Idea?

You’ve got your great idea for your novel. What’s next?

Authors fall into a spectrum of two approaches. First, there are plotters, who plan out the plot of their book and then write to that plan.

Then there are ‘pantsers’, those who sit on their pants and type away until a book emerges–or not.

Then there are endless variations between the two. I’m firmly in the first group. If you want to learn the pantser approach, find another author! I can’t even imagine how I’d write that way, and I’ve got a good imagination.

Let’s take my first novel, Zombie Turkeys. I created a chapter outline of the book on my first day of writing it during NaNoMo in November 2015.

Free Plotting Lessons
Good Plot — Click on the Zombie Turkeys book cover to hear Andy read a free excerpt.

Read my Zombie Turkeys chapter outline:

Posted on February 29, 2024February 29, 2024 by admin — Leave a comment

Best February Reviews from Readers!

Best February Reviews from Readers! What’s going on in the book world this February? Who has reviewed what? Which books stand out from the rest? Let me share with you the best reviews of some great books.

Best February Reviews: Here is Your First Review

A Pub In the Underworld cover
Best February Reviews

Get your autographed copy

Author 10 books, 94 followers

February 17, 2024

I’ve read a lot of Harmon Cooper and this is the coziest book he’s ever written. Here we have a hardened soldier, Sylus Runewolf, dying as he fought his country’s enemies in a battle. After his death he wakes up in the underworld. What’s more, he has a deed to a pub.

Some of Sylus’ favorite memories are from his boyhood where he helped in his father’s pub, so he’s eager to get the pub up and going. It’s quite the fixer-upper. But he gets a pub cat, Patches, who’s magical and helps him protect the pub from rats–and demons.

The pub is in Ember Hollow which is hard by the Chasm, the hell that is below the underworld. Sometimes demons slip in. Overhead are are Celestial Plains, or heaven, glowing in the sky.

This book is a delight for brewers, fantasy lovers, and RPG lit readers!

Best February Reviews: Your Second Review

Secret Supers audiobook cover
Best February Reviews — Secret Supers audiobook

Kat M

3,211 reviews

19 followers

February 25, 2024

This was a fun concept in the super-hero genre, it had everything that I was looking for in this type of book. The characters were interesting and had a great overall feel to this world. I enjoyed what I read and can’t wait for the sequel. Andy Zach has a great writing style and I’m glad I got to read this.

Get your ebook for .99

Best February Reviews: Your Third Review

Get your free audiobook here!

Author 10 books, 94 followers

February 27, 2024

I just re-read this novel after 20 years from my first read. I loved my initial read and I kept remembering inspirational sections of the book, so I had to re-read it.

Ben Fielding, a successful VP with a keen interest in China, leads his company investments there in the 1990s. To promote their Chinese division, Ben decides to spend a couple weeks living with a Chinese family. He decides to contact his old Harvard roommate, Li Quan, who went back to China after graduating with honors.

Ben has mixed emotions about his old friend. They were very close at Harvard, but fell out of touch while Ben got married, had kids, and got divorced. There’s also the awkward fact Ben introduced Quan to Christianity, which Ben no longer practices.

So with mixed emotions Ben drives to meet his old friend, three hours away from Shanghai.

That’s when the novel really begins. Li Quan is the backup pastor for an illegal Chinese house church and is under suspicion by the government. Ben is clueless about Christianity in China. It’s a major threat to the Communist government which persecutes it severely. Ben is forceed to decide between his old friend and his company, which needs the favor of the Chinese government.

The novel holds up well 20 years later. China has become more repressive toward Christianity and Christianity has grown beyond a hundred million people.

Best February Reviews: Your Last Review

What is Villain’s Vacation All About?

Four disabled seventh-graders with superpowers take a vacation at Coaster World. They need a break from fighting criminals. Ever since the beginning of the school year when they acquired their unusual abilities, they’ve been training and using those powers to fight crime in their town.

Little do they know the arch-villain they recently defeated also loves coasters and is vacationing at Coaster World. Worse, the villain wants revenge. Nothing less than turning these teens to a life of crime will satisfy.

Can Jeremy, Dan, Kayla, and Aubrey withstand the villain’s attacks? Or will they become Super Villains?
Click for your Villain’s Vacation autographed copy

What Do YOU Think? But First, Your Free Book

I wasn’t kidding. You can really get this book for free. I give it to all my newsletter subscribers right here: click to get your audiobook.

What’s the catch? I only have limited supplies of free codes. When they’re gone, they’re gone.

So, tell me what you think! Leave a review of my books and I’ll publish it on my blog. On Amazon, post them starting here.

On Goodreads, post your review starting here.

Pop hit from American Idol by Maddie Poppe: Going, Going, Gone.

Posted on February 4, 2024February 2, 2024 by admin — Leave a comment

Happy Undead Mother-in-law Day–Or Valentine’s Day

“What’s ‘Happy Undead Mother-in-law Day? I know all about Valentine’s Day. That’s February 14th. What’s up with Happy Undead Mother-in-law?” you may ask.

I’m glad you asked! It so happens My Undead Mother-in-law begins on Valentine’s Day. As the book opens, the family has dinner together, the undead zombies and the normal family members. Naturally, we celebrate it every year.

2023: My Undead Mother-in-law Free Excerpts

2021: What Audiobook Listeners Say About My Undead Mother-in-law

Here’s 2018’s celebration.

All of 2017 was dedicated to My Undead Mother-in-law.

If you want to read all my posts on My Undead Mother-in-law, click here.

What’s that you say? You’d actually like to hear that scene? It so happens I’ve recorded myself reading it right here:

But maybe you want to read it yourself. No problem! I’ve got a free excerpt of chapter 1 right here for my faithful blog readers. Just drop me a note and I’ll send it to you.

Happy Undead Mother-in-law’s Day – You Can’t Afford a copy?

This is a common problem. You can’t afford the $17.95 for the audiobook version, the $12.95 for the print version, or even $2.99 for the ebook version. (PSST! It’s on sale for .99 this week until February 11)

Good news! I’m giving away a free audiobook at the end of this month. Sign up right now for my newsletter.

You can also read the book for free on Kindle or Audible.

As an added incentive you can get a signed copy from me for a mere $12! You can’t beat that with a stick, so click here now.

Finally, if you’re desperate, you can always do what I do when I want to read a book and not pay for it. Go to Amazon and click on the ‘Look Inside’ button and read random sections until you’ve read it all.

One more thing: here’s a Review

Why is this my favorite review? It’s from a professional author who doesn’t like zombie books, yet loved My Undead Mother-in-law..

Stephanie Barr

Not your standard zombie tale

December 28, 2018Format:

Kindle Edition

Verified Purchase

When I started to read this book, I was leery. As far as I know, I’m less interested in zombies than anyone on the planet. How could I give a reasonable review? Turns out, it wasn’t hard at all. I’ve said before and it turned out to be true here that, if you have a ridiculous premise that’s hard to swallow, run with it, normalize it, and readers /viewers will eventually accept. And it worked. The original premise of cognizant, virtually indestructible zombies was lobbed and backed until I was a believer, actively rooting for zombies. Plenty of (bloodier than average) action, some smiling, if not guffaw humor, a nice fulfilling story arc in an easy readable length made for a fun book (if bloody action doesn’t bother you) with charm that didn’t take itself to seriously but still capable of many a tender and touching moments.

I’m glad my prejudice didn’t keep me from enjoying this out-of-the-common-way story.

Happy Undead Mother-in-law’s Day – Now What’s Next?

What’s next? I loved Diane Newby, my Happy Undead Mother-in-law so much, I wrote another novel with her as the main character, Paranormal Privateers. I put Diane and her family on a superyacht and send them around the world as privateers fighting enemies of the US with a letter of Marquis from the President.

Here’s the cover:

SciFi Fuel Paranormal Privateers — The cover of my third novel Paranormal Privateers. Click to get yours.

Starting Paranormal Privateers — The Paranormal Privateers back cover. Click to get it.

But that’s not all! I’ve got the back cover for you, which I like even more:

Posted on February 2, 2024February 2, 2024 by admin — Leave a comment

Best 5 Books I’ve Read This Year 2024

Best 5 Books I’ve Read This Year 2024 of the 11 I’ve read.

I won’t put them in any order. I don’t have a favorite book among these. Do you? Let me know.

Best 5 Books I’ve Read This Year – The First

My Review

Author 10 books94 followers

January 27, 2024

This was a fun and creative twist on the Battle Mage Farmer series. After saving the world where they lived, John and Ellie go on their honeymoon, into the chaotic void. They’re transported by their faithful super-bull Ferdinand and guided by Ellie’s prescient sense of direction.

Eventually, they end up in a confusing cluster of planets where there is a nest of vicious void beasts.

What a start to a honeymoon!

This creativity continues for the rest of the book.

Enjoy!

Best 5 Books I’ve Read This Year – The Second

My Review

Author 10 books

94 followers

January 28, 2024

This progressive fantasy continues with our protagonists Matt and Liz highly trained after years of ascending the path to Level 10.

Now they’ll compete with other Pathers at that level and the problem isn’t they aren’t strong enough, but that they’re too strong! You see, promising Pathers are assassination targets for the other Great Powers who do not want to face the in war.

So they adopt three false identities each and play under their ‘real’ identities, but using only a limited amount of power.

They want to walk a delicate balance. They want to hide their real powers and still qualify for high rewards within the tournament.

Meanwhile, we learn that spies from every government are seeking out their true identities by any means possible.

Best 5 Books I’ve Read This Year – The Third

My Review

Author 10 books

94 followers

January 28, 2024

What a cool book! I knew nothing about globemaking beyond gores; now I know a whole lot more, both of the multiple crafts involved and of its history.

But what makes the book great is the author’s personal story, telling how he went from making a handmade globe for his father’s 80th birthday to starting a bespoke globe company with a worldwide audience and customer base.

It’s a review of both the history of globemaking and of our recent history from 2008 to now.

I recommend this book to anyone with an ounce of curiosity.

Best 5 Books I’ve Read This Year – The Fourth

My Review

Author 10 books

94 followers

January 27, 2024

What a wonderful explanation of basic Christian principles! Author Miles Stanford explains both the theory and practice of Christian living and growth.

He begins with the cross and explains that trying hard to overcome sin is not enough. We must totally die to sin and realize our death daily. But our death leads to our resurrection in Christ. Having Christ live in us is how we triumph.

How can this miracle be achieved? Not by us. But Christ has already done it. It is up to us to believe and to claim His life and to live it through faith and perseverance.

Mr. Stanford draws from a wide range of respected Christian authors and teachers as well as many quotes from the Bible to prove his points.

I recommend this book most highly to anyone who wishes to learn about Christianity.

This fourth time around, I was writing my own fantasy novel/series and I looked at how Pratchett started out his series. It was a ripping good start, with unending action and interesting characters from the beginning. Who doesn’t like Death as an animated skeleton and a lugubrious voice?

We come to my first favorite SciFi novel and it’s a goody.

My Review

Best 5 Books I’ve Read This Year – The Fifth

For those who don’t read past the first heading, here’s a free book gift for you. The giveaway only lasts until January 9th, so grab it quickly! Click here.

Author 10 books

94 followers

January 3, 2024

My first book of the year! It’s a fantasy, with familiars who are intelligent badgers, owls, hamsters, and prairie dogs. Enjoy a dash of humor with your fantasy.

Familiars enhance and magnify your magic, but they come with troubles of their own. They’re just people, who are animals.

What Can Top The Best 5 Books?

Free gifts! I gave away literary gifts from December 1 to December 25 to celebrate Advent 2023. These include free books and free excerpts. Enjoy them below. Don’t forget to get free audiobooks from me by clicking here.

Posted on January 7, 2024January 6, 2024 by admin

Pick Up More Gifts for the 12 Days of Christmas

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is Secret-Supers-Series-150x150.jpg

Welcome 2024! Pick Up More Gifts for the 12 Days of Christmas. In this post you can get book excerpts, free, and discounted books for you!

You may be familiar with the 12 days of Christmas song. The actual 12 day festival ran from December 25th to January 6th, also known as Epiphany, when Christians celebrated the appearance of the wise men or magi from the east.

This post covers days seven to twelve.

Days one through six are here: Welcome 2024! Pick Up More Gifts for the 12 Days of Christmas

Here’s the song:

12 Days of Christmas

The Secret Supers are bored out of their minds during summer vacation-until they go to Space Camp. They learn all about the space program, try out moon gravity and zero-g simulations, and practice docking with the International Space Station.

But that’s the easy part. The villains they defeated in the past are back with a diabolical plot that renders the middle schoolers’ superpowers ineffective. Jeremy, Aubrey, Dan, and Kayla face the biggest challenge of their lives. Even if they escape the villains’ clutches, will they survive?

Find out in Secret Supers in Space!

Pick Up More Gifts – Seven Swans a-Swimming

Where do I have seven swans a-swimming in my books? How about seven turkeys? Or more? Check out this excerpt from Zombie Turkeys from Chapter 9 – Chicago. Note the aquarium type chapter icon.

They very cautiously looked in the topmost door. The door opened onto a platform looking down on a large pool full of sea creatures–including a great white shark. A man was there at the edge of the pool, blowing a turkey call. “GOBBLE! GOBBLE!” That was the odd sound Sam had heard. The zombie turkeys responded, “Gobble! Gobble!” and advanced en masse on the man, surrounding him. They seemed mesmerized by the call, staring with red eyes, but quietly marching forward. The man wore a khaki, camouflaged hunting outfit, cammo boots, and a full, bushy beard.

Sam called to him, “Hey you! You can escape this way!”

He looked at them, “Yeah, I know. I’ve got to kill these buggers.”

“How will you kill them with a turkey caller?”

Pick Up More Gifts – Excerpt Continues

“By getting them into the pool with me. It’s salt water. I’ve already gone through my ammo!” He jumped into the aquarium.

“Noo! ” Lisa gasped.

From the water he called, ” GOBBLE! GOBBLE!” Like lemmings, the massed turkeys moved forward, plopping into the water like feathered, twenty pound Alka Seltzers. The ones behind pressed the others forward. Soon, hundreds upon hundreds of turkeys covered the surface of the water, like a turkey patterned pool cover.

As soon as they were in the salt water, the zombie turkeys lost their red eyes. They swam as well as turkeys normally do; badly. Then the great white shark hit. Gobbling the turkeys three and four at a time, the shark was delighted to have this extra feeding. This food was so fresh and crunchy!

The shark was an automatic eating machine; bite, crunch, swallow, bite crunch, swallow.

This excerpt is gift number two of seven. (After the Secret Supers in Space) Here are three free books in exchange for a review:

Pen Name	Email Integration
Secret Supers	Andy Zach	Get your review copy here
Secret Supers in Space	Andy Zach	Get your review copy here
Zombie Turkeys	Andy Zach	Get your review copy here

Get your free review copies here!

That’s five gifts. Two more to come! First, get a free newsletter subscription here: Clickety-click!

Next, get personal with me, Andy Zach! Talk to me! You can reach me on x.com.

On to more days of Christmas–and gifts!

Pick Up More Gifts – Eight Maids a-Milking

Do I have eight maids a-milking in my writing? Anywhere? Not exactly. I do have eight reporters covering the zombie turkey outbreak for the Midley Beacon and milking it for all it’s worth. This excerpt from Zombie Turkeys, with the Chapter 9 Chicago icon. That’s a turkey caller in the turkey’s mouth. Why? Read and find out.

“I never thought I’d say this, Sam, but I think the story has gotten too big for the Midley Beacon. I’ve added a zombie turkey Twitter feed to our site, but this is way too big for us to be everywhere, even with the six new reporters I’ve hired. I’ve sent one to Bartonville and Peoria, one to Princeville, two to Joliet, one to Tinley Park, and one to Chicago. Chicago alone should have six reporters.”

“Well, let’s go to Chicago then. Three are better than one.”

“I’m with you on that. Lemme give Charlie a call. He’s our guy in Chicago.” She called Charlie Gomez, one of their new reporters. “Hi Charlie, where are you?”

Pick Up More Gifts – Excerpt Part 2

“I can barely hear you. Oh, keep your head down, then. We’ll cover the loop activity then. Ok, good reporting. Stay alive! Report daily or more often! Bye.”

“What’s up with Charlie?”

“He’s in the middle of the zombie turkey firefight in Soldiers Field. It’s quite a melee there. Let’s go to the loop.”

How about eight gifts? In addition to the excerpt above, I’ve got seven books available through free audiobook codes:

Author	Andy Zach
1	Zombie Turkeys (United Kingdom only)	Andy Zach
2	Secret Supers	Andy Zach
3	Secret Supers in Space	Andy Zach
4	Zombie Detective	Andy Zach
5	Villain’s Vacation	Andy Zach
6	Paranormal Privateers	Andy Zach
7	My Undead Mother-in-law	Andy Zach
8	Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse	Andy Zach

Pick Up More Gifts – Nine Ladies Dancing

Zombie Turkeys fly to escape to Zombie Turkey hunters

Have I got the excerpt for you! I’ve got twenty or more ladies dancing in this scene from My Undead Mother-in-law.

Frank always got hyped up before an operation, but this one was the strangest he’d ever been on. He’d done his time in Afghanistan and Iraq—that was where he’d lost his leg to an IED. When the marine doctors offered him a chance to get it back through zombie blood, he’d leapt upon it like a duck on a bug. Now he was landing a whole platoon of marines on a superyacht of a criminal, to prepare the landing of more zombies.

Things got stranger. Looking at the helipad as he descended, he saw a crowd of hula-skirt-clad girls—good looking ones too! The crowd resolved itself into a formation: a smiley face! As he landed and brought his weapon to ready, he saw each girl carried a basket of leis.

The Dancing Begins

SciFi Story Fuel My Undead Mother-in-law
Welcome 2024
Pick Up More Gifts — My Undead Mother-in-law cover.

“Welcome! Welcome!” they chorused in their soprano voices. They ran up to put the leis over his head. He kept them away with the bayonet on his automatic shotgun. Laughing, the nearest ones tossed leis over his gun and over his head. “Aloha Oe” blared in the background on the outdoor speakers as the attractive ladies began to sway in a hula dance en masse.

Yellow flowers decorated his head and his rifle. He felt awkward and a right fool. Already the battle plan was out the window.

“Ladies! Please gather over here!” He followed the contingency plan for if they surrendered.

Giggling, the hundred or so beauties compliantly assembled in the landing circle under the V-22, their hair and grass skirts blowing wildly in the hot rotor wash. After tearing his eyes from their shapely legs, he saw his friend Lieutenant Gerber walk up to him, festooned in leis.

“Not bad duty, eh?”

“Something about this smells.”

“Well, here come the zombie bulls. And turkeys.”

Nine gifts? How about nine discounts for autographed books? These paperbacks are discounted from the Amazon price. Get them here:

Pick Up More Gifts – Featured Items

Zombie Turkeys signed by author

My Undead Mother-in-law – Signed by author

Paranormal Privateers – Signed by author

$15.00

Zombie Detective – signed by author

Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse – signed by author

Villain’s Vacation signed by author

$7.00

Secret Supers in Space signed by author

$7.00

Secret Supers Signed by author 2

$7.00

The Gospel Medley – autographed copy

$15.00

Welcome 2024 Pick Up More Gifts – Ten Lords a-Leaping

I don’t have ten lords a leaping (I do have several dozen drug lords, though). How about leaping hippos? What, you don’t believe me? Check out this hippo excerpt from Zombie Detective.

“Let me finish with the background. We wanted a fast-growing, healthy strain of pigs. I thought, Wouldn’t it be great if they grew as fast as zombie turkeys?”

“Uh-oh.”

“Right. I created a pig modified with zombie turkey and hippo and mouse DNA.”

“What?” Sam’s stomach clenched.

“I won’t go into all my failures with other combinations. This one worked. I get pigs that grow from piglets to full-grown in four weeks.”

“But what’s the catch?”

“They look like hippos. And they grow only to about one pound.”

Micro-hippo

“Sounds more like a failure than a success.”

“They do taste like pork. And they reproduce fast enough to make up for their lack of size. But―” Bryce stopped and sighed.

“Tell me the worst.”

“They escaped my lab. They’re infesting the whole building. People keep finding them in the toilets. It’s very upsetting.”

So, these hippos leap and scamper like rats. Aquatic rats. Here’s a drawing of one from the chapter about them.

You want eight more gifts? Get all my excerpts for each of my books!

Zombie Turkey excerpts

Zombie Detective excerpts

My Undead Mother-in-law excerpts

Paranormal Privateer excerpts

Oops! excerpts

Secret Supers Excerpts

Villain’s Vacation Excerpts

Secret Supers in Space Excerpts

Welcome 2024 Pick Up More Gifts – Eleven Pipers Piping

This’ll be a different set of gifts. I love bagpipes. I have a Youtube category of them. So I’ll share my favorite bagpipe videos with you. Eleven of them!

March of Cambreadth

Amazing Grace with more than 200 bagpipes; live in Berlin

they said she couldn’t play BLUES on BAGPIPES…

Scotland the Brave India the Bold (Bagpipes) Official Music Video – The Snake Charmer ft. Poczy

Celtic-Indian Folk Music (Bagpipes & Bhangra) – Frantic Feathers (Toss the feathers)

Through the Fire and Flames (Official Video) – Mia x Ally

Scottish tribal pipes & drums band Clanadonia playing “Ya Bassa” during St Andrew’s Day event 2019

Red Hot Chilli Pipers – Thunderstruck – Wiesbaden 8.11.16

The Badpiper Thunderstruck

Monty Python and the Holy Grail Performed on Flaming Bagpipes and Unicycle in Portland, OR

Welcome 2024 Pick Up More Gifts – Twelve Drummers Drumming

I had so much fun with those eleven bagpipe videos from my Youtube collection, here are twelve drummer videos from my percussion collection!

Harry James and Buddy Rich – Cherokee 1964

” Autumn Leaves ” Chet Baker – Paul Desmond

“The Lion Sleeps Tonight” by Dover Steel Drum Band

best drumline video ever amazing

Joy in the Whirlwind’ for garklein recorder and percussion | by Melika Fitzhugh

TUBA SKINNY Go Craig and Robin go!

Gene Krupa “Sing, Sing, Sing” on The Ed Sullivan Show

Bugle Call Rag – Benny Goodman – 1936

the craziest drum solo ever

Caravan (Ellington) – Drum-Battle Charly Antolini, Wolfram Kellner, Paul Höchstädter, Thilo Wolf

Laurindo Almeida plays One Note Samba

Czardas – Trình tấu Đàn T’Rưng Việt Nam với tác phẩm Phương Tây

Pick Up More Gifts – Don’t Forget Your Free Book–Until January 9th

First an excerpt:

We arrived at the top. “Time to ship out the Supers.” Papa Smith hauled out Aubrey and Jeremy. I unloaded Kayla and Dan. We lined them up on the floor.

“It’d be so easy to eliminate them here.”

“Yes, Loretta, but the consequences will follow us. And there’s no money in it. Think of each of them as a billion dollars.”

“Nice idea, Papa.”

There’s four more gifts with this one!

You can get your free review copy by clicking here.

Get your discounted signed copy by clicking here. Free shipping from the author.

How about a free audiobook or two? Get your Secret Supers in Space by clicking here!! You might as well pick up your free Villain’s Vacation while you’re at it.

If you have any questions or comments for me, leave them here.

Buy any of my books directly from me at my store. Click here.

Or buy them from my Square site. Click here.

Finally, you can go to Amazon and get them.

Posted on January 4, 2024January 4, 2024 by admin — 1 Comment

Welcome 2024! 12 Gifts for the 12 Days of Christmas

Welcome 2024! 12 Gifts for the 12 Days of Christmas. I’m author Andy Zach and I’ve got the latest reviews, free, and discounted books for you! Let’s start with the reviews!

Here’s the song:

12 Days of Christmas

Welcome 2023 – A Partridge in a Pear Tree

What is my writing is like a Partridge in a Pear Tree? How about a turkey in a tree? This excerpt from Zombie Turkeys.

First Draft Complete
Welcome 2024 — Zombie Turkeys fly to escape to Zombie Turkey hunters

“Come back for more? Eat fire and die!” She sprayed napalm ferociously. It didn’t ignite. The spark ignition failed. Without thinking, she leapt toward the nearest tree, shedding the useless tank with a shrug of her shoulders. In case she needed any additional motivation, the turkeys pecked her butt all the way up.

The turkeys did not give up trying to get her in the tree. They kept flying up and attacking her. She wielded her Bowie knife. That was Rulon’s gift to her. He had it inscribed “To Lashon, from Rulon.” After about ten minutes of fighting them off, her arm was getting tired. She switched to her left arm. She wasn’t particularly dexterous with her left, but she didn’t have to be. Twenty pound turkeys who flew straight at you didn’t require much precision to strike. The most disheartening thing was, she’d stab one through the heart, have it drop fifteen to the ground with a satisfying “Thud!”, and then have it stagger to its feet five minutes later and fly back up fifteen minutes later.

Welcome 2024 – Two Turtledoves

Did you enjoy our free excerpt? Great!

But where can I find two turtledoves in my writing? I don’t have any. But I have two chipmunks from my villain in My Undead Mother-in-law

SciFi Story Fuel My Undead Mother-in-law
Welcome 2024 — My Undead Mother-in-law cover.

Hundreds of miles away, Vik Staskas smiled to himself. Nothing like bringing his objects of interest directly into his reach. Vik was not a sentimental man, but he had a fondness for his cyborg chipmunks since they were his first cyborg animals he had created for his Ph.D. A computer chip listened, saw, and transmitted via 4G cell phone network to his cell or the nearest computer screen in his network. While one chipmunk listened above their office, another had chewed a hole in the ceiling and watched them and Lisa’s large computer screen. Vik whimsically named them Alvin and Theodore.

But this free excerpt is not your only gift: Have a free copy of My Undead Mother-in-law! Just click here.

All I ask is that you review the book after you’re done.

And here’s a review for you:
Brad Secrest 61 reviews

November 21, 2023

Great story! This is a hilarious Superhero Zombie bit of fun. All of the characters are fantastic. You’ll fall in love with at least 10 of them. 🙂 Highly recommended for the humorous sci-fi zombie lover.

Welcome 2024 – Three French Hens

I don’t have three French hens for you either. But I have three detectives in my Zombie Detective novel. And they’re in New York City, so that’s like the ‘French Connection’.

Sorry, that’s the best I can do!

Check out the excerpt:

“I’ll have you meet the detectives on the case.” He pressed his comm. “Tammy? Send in Boxer and Poodles.”

“Your detectives are named Boxer and Poodles?”

“Boxer is his real name. Ted Boxer. ‘Poodles’ is a nickname for Penelope Palmer.”

“I’d think she’d go by ‘Penny.’”

“She hates Penny. Don’t ask her why. Wait till you see her.”

The pair entered. Ted Boxer was a smiling, handsome man in his forties with short blond hair combed back from his forehead. Penelope, or Poodles, was half a head taller than Ted, with long legs and arms and curly hair englobing her head in a sphere of ringlets.

“Boxer, Poodles, this is Sam Melvin. I told you he’d be helping.”

“Pleased to meet you, Sam.” Ted pumped his hand vigorously.

“Likewise.”

Sam looked to Poodles. She had an attractive brown face with a serious, almost stern look.

“I don’t do glad-handing. I don’t like people in general.”

“Uh, OK. So I should call you Poodles?”

“That’s my name.” She looked reproachfully at Sam, like he should know better.

Your other two gifts? Get two discounted books for .99 Zombie Turkeys and Secret Supers

Welcome 2024 – Four Calling Birds

I’ve got four calling birds for you–and a lot more.

In Paranormal Privateers, my zombie turkeys have been weaponized by the undead mother-in-law and used–well, you’ll see in the following excerpt.

Looking at Lulu and Sharon, I said, “I’ll take half the animals and go to the left around the main base. You go the other way. Try not to kill anyone unless it’s absolutely necessary. You know how pro-life we are.”

The zombie animals all obeyed human zombies, but not much else. They could follow simple commands: “This way,” “Stop,” “Left,” “Right.” The corgis were the most obedient, the turkeys the least. They knew not to eat people without permission—barely. The bulls followed heel and leg direction like horses—eventually.

The corgis and bulls raced around the compound with us. The zombie turkeys milled outside the walls, eating anyone who sought to flee. As we caught people, I directed them to lay down on the ground and I tied them up with the zip ties I had picked up in the garage. I encountered steady gunfire, but after it proved completely ineffective against us zombies, people just started running. I pursued.

What else do I have for you? How about free audiobooks. Click to get any or all of Zombie Detective, My Undead Mother-in-law, Paranormal Privateers. The offer is good until I run out of free codes for you.

Welcome 2024 – Five Gold Rings!

Do I have five gold rings for you? No, but I have several billion dollars stolen by my criminals in Secret Supers in Space.

Read a little about it in this excerpt:

We arrived at the top. “Time to ship out the Supers.” Papa Smith hauled out Aubrey and Jeremy. I unloaded Kayla and Dan. We lined them up on the floor.

“It’d be so easy to eliminate them here.”

“Yes, Loretta, but the consequences will follow us. And there’s no money in it. Think of each of them as a billion dollars.”

“Nice idea, Papa.”

There’s four more gifts with this one!

You can get your free review copy by clicking here.

Get your discounted signed copy by clicking here. Free shipping from the author.

How about a free audiobook or two? Get your Secret Supers in Space by clicking here!! You might as well pick up your free Villain’s Vacation while you’re at it.

Welcome 2024 – Six Geese a-laying!

You might guess that I don’t have geese a-laying, any number. But I do have zombie turkeys laying eggs. In fact, I have a whole sub-plot devoted to it–int two different books.

Let’s give you the Zombie Turkeys excerpt:

“Approximately one hundred fifty thousand domestic turkeys have gone zombie, and approximately one hundred thousand wild turkeys. The National Turkey Institute has bred zombie turkeys and discovered their growth cycle is vastly accelerated. The eggs hatch faster, the poults grow faster and are dangerous within three weeks. There are an estimated one hundred thousand new zombie turkeys added to the flocks ravaging Illinois since the plague began at the beginning of November.

“Furthermore, not only are the zombie turkeys resistant to damage, and not only do they regenerate quickly, but once regenerated, they are two to three times stronger than normal turkeys.

“Citizens are advised to stay within their homes. Those with bunkers or air raid shelters should stay in them until further notice. Those on the road to Illinois are advised to stop and return home. The Federal government has stopped all road, sea, and air traffic to Illinois. The US Army, Marines and Air Force are currently conducting operations against the zombie turkeys and expect to eliminate them within a week.

Four more gifts Below

Aside from the free excerpt, you can listen to Zombie Turkeys, Zombie Detective, My Undead Mother-in-law, Paranormal Privateers, and Oops! on Audible for free. Be sure to check out my great voice actors, Phil Blechman and others. There’s a link to Audible by each book cover.

Then we have:

If you have any questions or comments for me, leaven them here.

Next is Paranormal Privateers Click to listen

After that, you’ve got Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse

Six More Days of Gifts to Come

I’ll make another post for the last twelve days of Christmas by Sunday, January 7th, 2024. I have a lot more gifts and discounts for you!

Buy any of my books directly from me at my store. Click here.

Or buy them from my Square site. Click here.

Finally, you can go to Amazon and get them.

Posted on December 17, 2023December 17, 2023 by admin — 1 Comment

Imagine You’re a Privateer. What Is It Like?

Imagine You’re a Privateer. What’s It Like? That’s the premise of Paranormal Privateers. Through a series of events (In My Undead Mother-in-law) an ordinary, middle-aged couple becomes the leaders of a ship of privateers. Well, they’re ordinary, middle-aged zombies. My zombies regenerate, they don’t rot. They get stronger and faster, sort of like superheroes.

About Paranormal Privateers
You're A Privateer — Chapter 1 icon

But what are privateers? They’re hired by the government for military duties, usually by ship. We got close to hiring airship companies to patrol the coasts in World War II. We hired ships in the War of 1812. The President still has that power.

But let’s start at the beginning: Their first assignment is to get the ringleader of band of Somalia pirates.

By the way, I show you how to get this book at over 80% off, later on.

Imagine You’re a Privateer – The Opening

Chapter 1 – Somalia

I sighed with relief when the US flag came down and the surrender flag went up on the mast of the enormous luxury yacht. I didn’t mind firing rounds from my AK-47 over their heads, but I hated killing people. They’re only infidels, but they’re still people.

Inhaling the salted breeze I grinned back at Muhammed, who was cheering and laughing from his seat behind the M2 machine gun in the bow of our boat we used to patrol the coasts and fishing waters of Somalia.

The sun gleamed off his white teeth, set in his brown face. “Look! They’re stopping” he cried.

True enough. The bow wave ceased as I watched. A pod of dolphins ended their sporting on the wake and submerged. The gleaming white yacht was truly enormous. What were they doing in the fishing waters of Somalia? I couldn’t imagine the wealth onboard. Enough for our whole village to eat well for a year!

Imagine You’re A Privateer – Part 2

Our Supreme Leader, Omar Ogala, had organized the fishermen and former coast guard sailors to patrol our fishing waters. He ordered us to capture any fishing or cargo vessels we found. He told us the Americans and Europeans no longer cared about Somalia with the other crisis around the world and we could defend our fishermen from foreign competition—and dumpers. Many foreign nations, knowing Somalia’s weakness, would send cargo ships full of pollutants and dump them in our waters.

I never expected to see a luxury ship here. It was as big as a cruise liner, but it was apparently a private yacht. I’d seen one once before, when an Arab sheik visited Mogadishu. This one was three times the size! The owner would pay big to get it back. Maybe even a billion dollars? I couldn’t imagine that much money, and I was good with numbers. Let’s see: fourteen million people lived in Somalia. Divide a billion dollars among them would give each about $70. Unbelievable. A family of five could live comfortably for year on that!

Imagine You’re a Privateer – Part 3

Writing Paranormal Privateers — The Paranormal Privateers back cover. Click to get yours!

I came along as a navigator, fighter, and boarder, guiding our boat along the shore of Somalia and into the Arabian Gulf for several days, before leading us back. Besides Muhammed and me, there was Zahi, another fighter and boarder, and Ali, our captain.

“Diric,” Ali said to me, “You and Zahi board this ship and take the helm. You will follow us back to Hobyo. Muhammud and I will stay on the boat and keep the machine gun on them.”

“Yes sir,” I said.

Ali took the megaphone we carried for ship to ship communication. “Let us board! Let us board! Or we will gun your ship!” I didn’t understand English, of course, but I knew what he was saying. Ali was the only one who knew any English.

Imagine You’re A Privateer – Part 4

“Don’t shoot! Give us time! We have to get our ladder!” Surprisingly, the person spoke in Arabic. It was good Arabic too, but with a strange Saudi and European accent. More surprisingly, it was a woman, a blonde, from what I could see of the figure leaning over the railing far above us.

We kept our boat about fifty meters away from the ship and watched the crew scurry about the decks.

There were many; I counted five including the main deck and there were at least three more decks below the main one.

Finally, rope ladder unrolled from the main deck, perhaps ten meters above us. We came close to the ship. I saw the pod of dolphins flash under our boat. Then they leapt out of the water and into it.

Only they weren’t the dolphins I had seen earlier. Four people in black wetsuits landed with heavy thumps in our boat. They had no breathing equipment, not even snorkles. They took off their goggles and their eyes shone bright red in the sun.

Imagine You’re a Privateer – Part 5

Happy Mother's Day
You're a privateer — Diane Newby, in her natural environment.

“Zombies!” cried Ali. “Shoot them!”

Automaticly I sprayed the nearest with my AK-47. I heard the others fire too. Muhammed shot the biggest one with the machine gun. That could cut a man in two.

Dozens of red craters appeared in the black wet suit of the one I shot. But she—it was a white, brown-haired woman—didn’t go down. Her brows furrowed in anger and shouting in English, she ripped the gun from my hand and threw it into the ocean.

The other zombies did the same, except the big one. He grabbed the barrel of the machine gun in both hands and wrenched it from Muhammud. I could hear his flesh sizzle on the hot barrel. Then he bent the barrel into a right angle. Rubbing his hands together afterward, the burnt skin fell on the deck of our boat. Pink skin showed on his palms.

He was enormous, bigger than two of us put together. He red eyes looked out of his calm, square face.

The bullets from the machine gun had sliced the wet suit open across his chest, and more pink skin showed in the gap. As I watched, brown hair grew from it.

We were all struck dumb with shock and terror. Then the woman I shot called up to the main deck. The one on deck yelled down in Arabic, “All of you, lie down on the deck, and you will live.” We quickly did.

Click to Get Your Copy! Now on Sale!

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Got questions? Comments? Reach me directly by clicking here. I’ll get back to you as quickly as I can.

Posted on November 28, 2023November 28, 2023 by admin

New November Reviews For You – SciFi and Fantasy

New November Reviews For You – SciFi and Fantasy – I just curated these for you. I’ll bet at least one of these books will appeal to you.

Here’s a review you’ll only find here, since the book is only on RoyalRoad.com, not Amazon or Goodreads.com. The good news is that the book is free!

Your August SciFi > In Enemy Hands

New November Reviews For You – Review #1

My Review 4 of 5 stars

Author 10 books

91 followers

November 21, 2023

Five-year-old Nadia has Hobson’s choice: become a slave to malevolent Elven Mage Morvilind and have him heal her dying brother; or have her brother die and become orphaned as the only remaining member of her family.

Nadia saves her brother’s life and begins arduous training as a thief for the mage. He sends her to get magical and historic artifacts for his collection. Her failure would mean her brother dies, as well as herself.

Then comes the greatest challenge of all–stealing a magical tablet from a billionaire. What’s worse, there’s another mysterious agent prowling around as well. And he has no shadow.

New November Reviews For You – Review #2

Get Your Zombie Turkeys Laughter — Zombie Turkeys front cover. Click to get a copy!

S. Policar 4 of 5 stars

Author 24 books

135 followers

November 20, 2023

On to the good stuff! If you’ve seen Poultrtgeist: Night of the Chicken Dead or Thankskilling and liked them, you’ll LOVE this. The sarcasm is there, the humor is dark and twisted, and our killer Tom Turkey wakes up every day feeling great and ready to see who he can kill in the state of Illinois with his massive flock of wild and domesticated zombie turkeys.

I loved this book. The end is a bit predictable given the fact that it’s a series, but it’s definitely the predictable you’d expect from something like this. I think this book would make a great low-budget movie like the two I mentioned earlier; and let’s be realistic, thanksgiving is a pretty much open holiday in the book and movie business.

I give this book 4 of 5 Paws and I look forward to reading the rest of this series.

New November Reviews For You – Review #3

Andy Zack is my favorite author!

Author 10 books

91 followers

November 17, 2023

I enjoyed The Big Easy novella enough that I was disappointed when it ended. But on the other hand, it didn’t seem to have the same stakes and tension the other novels in the series had. So I rated it as an Average, three-star apocalyptic fantasy.

I consider RPG novels as fantasies since they involve magic.

My rating scale:
5 stars = best of the genre, still selling after 50 years.
4 stars = above average for the genre
3 stars = average for the genre
2 stars = below average for the genre
1 star = execrable, not worth reading.

Finally, Your Fourth Review #4

Secret Supers in Space: The further adventures of disabled teen superheroes

Kathi Clements

November 11, 2023

I met Andy Zack at ChambanaCon several years ago. I walked by his sales table looking for something to read in the hotel room. The title “Zombie Turkeys” caught my eye so I bought a copy. I read it and found him to be so interesting that I sought him out again and we talked about the setting of that book. He knew all the places that I knew and described them accurately. I then bought all his new books as they came out, and I am now one of his biggest fans! I hope he keeps writing because I brag about him to my friends and family, and I want to add to my Life After Life and Secret Supers collections! I’ll buy everything he ever writes!

Do you have any questions? Any books you want me to read and review? Let me know by clicking here.

And Speaking of Zombies and Superheroes…

I have some books for you. Some .99, some free. (Click here for those!)

Zombie Turkeys – click to laugh!

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June Books
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Your August SciFi

Then you have Zombie Detective

Where reporter Sam Melvin becomes an amateur detective specializing in zombies.

Next we have:

What happens when your mother-in-law becomes and unkillable zombie?

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Your August SciFi

Up next is Paranormal Privateers Click to listen

The zombies are sent around the world by Presidential decree to fight US enemies.

After that, you’ve got Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse

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Best Science Stories or Science Fiction More Good Things Best Book Reviews
2023 Best Reviews
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Your August SciFi — Click to listen to free sample of Secret Supers.

Following my Life After Life Chronicles, we go to my disabled teen superhero series, we have two audiobooks.

Secret Supers is available in Audible for free if you subscribe or if you’re from the United Kingdom.

Get Your Latest Books
June Books
Best 2023 May Books
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Your August SciFi — Villain’s Vacation Audio book. Click to listen.

The next book in the series is Villain’s Vacation, the second of my three Secret Supers books.

Get Your Latest Books
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Produce Your Audiobook
Your August SciFi

Finally, my third book, Secret Supers in Space, just came out this year!

Click here to get an ebook or paperback from Amazon.

For all free audiobooks, click here to get them from me.

Posted on October 20, 2023October 20, 2023 by admin

Discover My Undead Mother-in-law Today!

Discover My Undead Mother-in-law in this post! I’m giving you everything I have about this delightful, middle-aged, zombie woman with anger managment issues. This is every post I have on her through my seven year career as a self-published author.

And, you can get my ebook for just .99! Click here now!

Here’s the info dump on Diane Newby, the undead mother-in-law. In time order:

New Book My Undead Mother-in-law Coming in July

If you hurry, you can still read the first book in the series, Zombie Turkeys before it comes out. Click on the next image to get it.

From May 24, 2017

Continue reading Discover My Undead Mother-in-law Today!

Posted on October 20, 2023October 20, 2023 by admin

Meet My Undead Mother-in-law

Meet My Undead Mother-in-law from my novel My Undead Mother-in-law. She’s Diane Newby. I’ll let her son-in-law Ron Yardly introduce her. Read the excerpt below. My book is .99 from August 20th until August 27th. Get your copy by clicking here.

My Undead Mother-in-law Chapter 1 Icon
Meet My Undead Mother-in-law — My Undead Mother-in-law Chapter 1 Icon

As we pulled up in Karen’s parents’ drive, I was reassured by the sheer normality of their three-bedroom suburban home: green yard partially covered with snow, evergreen bushes, two-car garage. There was no sign zombies lived there. Of course, what sign could I expect? A skull and crossbones and Beware of Zombies? Perhaps a biohazard sign?

Diane greeted us at the door. “Hello, my love!” She hugged Karen.

Karen barely flinched as she looked into her mother’s bright-red eyes. But she grunted “Ugh!” at the force of her embrace.

“Ease up, Mom.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“Hello, Mom,” I said as I hugged her as hard I as could.

She hugged me back twice as hard.

“Ugh,” I grunted too.

Diane still had blond-highlighted brown hair, as she did when I first met her. She’d gained a pound or two though. She smelled of the body talc White Linen. I recognized it because Karen and I bought it for her birthday last year, pre-zombie. And she still wore her cat-eye reading glasses on a chain around her neck.
My Undead Mother-in-law.

Meet My Undead Mother-in-law, Part 2

Happy Mother's Day
Meet My Undead Mother-in-law — Diane Newby, in her natural environment.

Diane seated us on the living room sofa. “Supper’s on. I have a nice pot roast for us tonight. Donnie and Maggie should be here soon. George!” she called. “The kids are here!”

A heavy tread down the stairs announced George Newby. His eyes shone red too, but while Diane was built like a middle-aged woman, George was a classic wide-body. His shoulders filled the stairway. You’d think he was a truck driver or a lineman rather than an accountant.

“Hi, Karen. Hi, Ron,” he rumbled. He hugged his daughter, as if he held a baby bird, and shook my hand without hurting me in his bratwurst fingers. His bright-red eyes looked squarely into mine.

“I’m so glad you made the trip. You can help us put to rest the ugly rumors that people with zombiism aren’t human. It’s just a disease. It’s not even harmful,” Diane enthused as she sat across from us. George sat next to her in a brown leather recliner.

“Mom, we love you. You don’t have to convince us,” I said.

“Of course not. I know that. It’s just that we’ve had people talking behind our backs at church and the public health officials trying to pressure us to get the treatment to eliminate the disease.”

“Don’t you want to get rid of it? I think the antibiotics for it are safe and effective.”

“You’d think so, but we actually have never felt better in our lives! I have more energy than ever, and so does George—right, George?”

“Yup.”

“My arthritic aches and pains have completely disappeared, and George’s old football knee injury is all better too.”

My Undead Mother-in-law.

Meet My Undead Mother-in-law and the Villain, Vik Staskas

Vik Staskas absently stroked his long glossy-black hair as he skimmed through the day’s news on his wall-mounted monitor from his five-hundred-foot superyacht. He noted the surge in zombie cures and sought to tap into the money. He hired operatives to infiltrate the Midley Beacon and SPEwZ Inc., the business arm of the famous charitable zombie organization. The possibility of failure didn’t occur to him. He succeeded in everything he tried: a street thief as an orphan in Belgrade; a college student in Paris, where he got his PhD in robotics; and taking over European organized crime without the nominal bosses knowing he existed. He was ready to take over the US.

He developed remote-controlled cyborg animals and insects. He used them to spy, to infiltrate, to conquer, to steal, to kill. They were unstoppable. He planned his first hijacking of a zombie blood air shipment from Gary, Indiana. He could think of several practical uses for cyborg-controlled zombies in his crime empire. As they were, zombies had too much free will for his taste. He chuckled. Even zombies didn’t stand a chance against him.
My Undead Mother-in-law.

Readers Speak About Meeting My Undead Mother-in-law

Not your standard zombie tale

My Undead Mother-in-law icon chapter 8
Meet My Undead Mother-in-law — My Undead Mother-in-law icon chapter 8

Click to get it! On sale for .99 from September 3rd to 10th.

The original premise of cognizant, virtually indestructible zombies was lobbed and backed until I was a believer, actively rooting for zombies. Plenty of (bloodier than average) action, some smiling, if not guffaw humor, a nice fulfilling story arc in an easy readable length made for a fun book (if bloody action doesn’t bother you) with charm that didn’t take itself to seriously but still capable of many a tender and touching moments.

I’m glad my prejudice didn’t keep me from enjoying this out-of-the-common-way story.

Stephanie Barr

Let’s start with wow!

5.0 out of 5 stars

Best August Videos
Meet My Undead Mother-in-law — Zombie corgi in Scotland from ‘My Undead Mother-in-law’

I am a huge zombie fan, I had thought the genre had worked itself out for a while and then I read this book. I think I have been scarred for life! I foresee months if not years of counseling in my future.

Not everyone is going to like every book, you know what that’s all right. Maybe they don’t understand the book. If you want to envision hordes of undead animals attacking the evil… sorry I don’t do spoilers. Think of a slightly sardonic look on life and you will be getting close.

While reading this book I was reminded of a visionary work of Cinema, “Polterygiest: Night of the Chicken Dead” a great movie by Troma Entertainment. Do yourself a favor check out this book.
an avid reader

Click Below to Get Your Copy!

SciFi Story Fuel My Undead Mother-in-law
Meet My Undead Mother-in-law — My Undead Mother-in-law cover. Click to get yours.

Any newsletter subscriber gets free audiobook codes–as long as they last. Click here to get yours. Don’t wait until they’re gone!

Got questions? Comments? Reach me directly by clicking here. I’ll get back to you as quickly as I can.

Posted on October 1, 2023September 29, 2023 by admin — 1 Comment

My Seventh-Year Anniversary as a Self-Published Author

Get Your Zombie Turkeys Laughter
Sixth-Year Anniversary
My Seventh-Year Anniversary — Zombie Turkeys front cover. Click to get a copy!

My Seventh-Year Anniversary as a Self-Published Author–how did I do it? How is it going so far? Hold onto your socks, because I’ll tell you all about it.

But before anything, grab a copy of my book for free. It’s free for 3 days, October 1-3 to celebrate my anniversary! Click here now!

On October 31st, 2016, I published this book:

Sam Melvin, an underachieving e-reporter from a small town, changes forever when he meets turkeys that won’t stay dead. You can shoot ’em, chop ’em, burn ’em—they come back stronger. The undead plague of poultry spreads uncontrollably, rocking the whole country. . .
From Zombie Turkeys’ Blurb

So, what happened next? What happened before the publication?

In the beginning . . .

Only Three Days Left: Get Your Free Book
My Sixth-Year Anniversary
My Seventh-Year Anniversary — A turkey who missed the free book offer. Click to get your free book.

Caterpillar forcibly retired me in October 2015. I didn’t want to rust on the pile of retirement, so I decided I would start writing a book. But I needed a topic. I wanted something light and funny.

We got a new turkey fryer and I tested it out. I brought in the fried turkey on a platter and said, “Imagine if this turkey came back to life!” Then someone said, “It’d be a zombie turkey.”

“Eureka! That’s it! That’s my book! Zombie turkeys! A whole apocalypse of them. It’ll be a parody of all zombie books ever written.”

My Seventh-Year Anniversary – What Happened Next?

I wrote about 48,000 words in November in the book for NaNoWriMo. Then I finished it in December. Then I edited it: six times over until March. I decided I needed an editor–and got her, Dori Harrell.

Then I decided to learn about publishing. I read about six books. I also took a writing course at my alma mater, Bradley university. Who knew point-of-view was so important?

I created a project plan for self-publishing. Then I decided to publish through Amazon, since it was easier and cheaper.

I went back and forth with my editor about six times. The novel was ready to publish, with 54,000 words.

Oops! I forgot to get a cover illustration! I needed one done and it was July 2016.

The Making of the Zombie Turkeys Cover

My Sixth-Year Anniversary
My Seventh-Year Anniversary — A cover draft. Click to see more.

Fortunately, I already wrote a blog post about this process. Click the title or here to read it.

Oh, I forgot. I also worked with my illustrator Sean “Fuzzy” Flanagan on my chapter icons. Read about it here: How we Made Zombie Turkeys Chapter Icons.

My Seventh-Year Anniversary – Format Editing

Text formatting–so simple–NOT! Readers expect books to be formatted a certain way. If you break the rules–like not starting your book on the right-hand page–you look like a rank amateur.

Which I was. But I didn’t want to look that way. I only got one chance to make a first impression. So I hired Rik Hall. He’s fast. He’s experienced. And he made my book in both paperback and ebook formats.

Finally I was ready. I uploaded my file to Amazon and ordered my proof copy. My launch date was set for October 31st, 2016 and ordered fifty paper copies from Amazon.

I was ready to launch. What happened next? Read my next blog to find out!

Posted on September 3, 2023September 1, 2023 by admin

Zombie Detective Excerpt 3

Zombie Detective Excerpt 3 – I’m sharing this THIRD excerpt of my book Zombie Detective with you, my readers. Enjoy!

Sam Melvin, Zombie Detective

Do you want excerpt 1? Click here to Meet Zombie Detective Sam Melvin .

Do you want excerpt 2? Click to read Secret Blog Post – Excerpt of Zombie Detective

Do you want to listen to the audiobook? Click here for Zombie Detective Audiobook Preview.

P.S. I give away free books for any comments on the excerpt. Just click here.

Chapter 3 – Turkeys

Secret Blog Post — Sam Melvin, dealing with Zombie Turkeys

“Me too. Now that’s over, let’s talk business. About Maryland.”

“What’s going on, Lisa?”

“After the zombie turkey apocalypse, they kept a flock of wild zombie turkeys for hunters. Maryland’s gotten great tourist trade from that. The recent bad weather on the East Coast has kept the hunters down, and the turkeys are out of control. They’re hunting people in the suburbs of Hagerstown.”

“What can I do about that? That’s a problem for the National Guard. I’m a lover, not a fighter.”

“Yes, I know. The governor, Mary Landis, called me begging for your help. They can’t find the turkeys. I promised her that you’ve got a nose for zombie turkeys and you’ll find their hideouts in no time flat. They’re paying you two thousand per day for this, so don’t screw up. I’ve booked an evening flight to Hagerstown from the Peoria airport at six p.m. That gives you an hour to get there. Starting now.”
Zombie Detective, by Andy Zach

Zombie Detective Excerpt 3 – Part 2

The captain put up a map on the wall-sized video screen. It was dotted with little black symbols and bigger red ones. Looking closely, Sam saw they were miniature turkeys.

“The small black symbols are where we’ve found turkeys. The large red ones are where we fought them. The battles are all on the west side of Hagerstown. And so are all the turkeys we’ve found in the woods.”

Sam walked to the screen and peered closely at the symbols. “Hmmm. Look at the turkey attacks, Captain. Do you see the pattern?”

“It’s kind of a semicircular tangent to Hagerstown. What does that mean?”

“See this attack near Cearfoss Pike? Then this one on Fairview Road? Look how they follow the Conococheague Creek. All these attacks in Fairview Acres—it’s surrounded by a big loop of the creek.”

“So they’re following the creek.”

“Yes. Even zombie turkeys need water. And I’m sure there are lots of trees and brush around it.”

“So much so we haven’t bothered investigating the banks.”

“That’s where we’ll go then.”
From Zombie Detective, by Andy Zach

Zombie Detective Excerpt 3 – Part 3

After killing hundreds of hibernating turkeys later, they got a comm: “All units proceed to MD-40. Major turkey attack underway in Cearfoss, Maryland.”

“Crap. That’s past their previous attack in Fairview Acres. They’re getting closer to Hagerstown,” Jeff said.

Sam gunned the engine, and they mushed uphill to the access road where the MRAP awaited them. Jimmy trotted behind them. Another MRAP picked up Amy.

Sam drove a quarter-mile into the woods, when the first zombie turkey flew into his face, spurs first. They scratched the tough Plexiglas on his helmet.

“Gobble! Gobble!”

Sam speared the bird on his twelve-inch knife and continued to plow toward the MRAP. Hundreds of turkeys descended from the trees. Sam ran over some, pounding them into the snow. Jeff shot them with his M4 carbine. Sam again gunned the engine as he hit level ground. The flock followed them, pecking at their backs, as they hunkered down on the eight-wheeled vehicle.

Zombie Detective Excerpt 3 – Part 4

First Draft Complete
Zombie Detective Excerpt 3 — Zombie Turkeys fly to escape to Zombie Turkey hunters

Sam had often thought zombie turkey victims looked like they had been assaulted by hundreds of pickaxes. Now he felt their beaks cut through his parka, slowly bleeding him to death. The cold air congealed his blood quickly. Next to him, Jeff had fixed a bayonet on his M4 carbine and sliced wildly, beating off the turkeys.

He saw the MRAP ahead and sped toward it. The flamethrower shot liquid flame over his head. He felt the heat on his exposed bloody skin.

Weak and faint from blood loss, Sam parked next to the MRAP as the flames shot out overhead. Jeff jumped out and opened the rear of the vehicle. Sam fell off into the soft snow between the vehicles. His last sight before losing consciousness was a huge tom turkey stalking toward him.

“Gobble! Gobble!”

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Andy Zach

Posted on September 1, 2023September 1, 2023 by admin — 2 Comments

Labor Day Potpourri from Author Andy Zach

Labor Day Potpourri from Author Andy Zach. “What’s potpourri?” you ask.

It’s whatever I’ve found over the past month or so on the internet.

First, from Facebook, it’s take your cat to work day.

What’s ‘Labor Day’? It’s the US holiday where we celebrate workers by giving them a day off.

Sam Melvin goes from reporter to detective. Zombie detective.

Zombie Detective cover
Labor Day Potpourri — Zombie Detective cover

You can get a signed copy with free shipping and no taxes from me by clicking right here!

You can also get an audiobook here: Grab a free listen.

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Labor Day Potpourri – Get Some Libraries Here

I love libraries. Do you? Let me know.

Where do you think this one is?

Answer below.

The Royal Portuguese Reading Room or Real Gabinete Português de Leitura, is a public library in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Elected the fourth most beautiful library in the world by Time magazine, it has the largest collection of Portuguese literature outside Portugal.

How about this library? Where is it and how big is it?

The clock is ticking.

The answer is next.

The largest library collection in the world is the British Library in London, with a range from 170 to 200 million items! Recognized for its history and architecture, it contains copies of every book produced in the United Kingdom and Ireland, in multiple languages and formats in print and digital. Before its establishment as the British Library, this collection of materials and books was a part of the British Museum until 1973. The Library is recognized as a research library, so it also contains scripts, databases, maps, and more in addition to its extensive book collection. Every year, another 3 million or so reading materials are added into the British Library!

Slang terms from the 1930s

Don’t you hate it when some kaylied up nogoodnik blows your wig at the juke? If you’ve ever been there, or if you have no idea what that means, here are 20 slang terms from the 1930s that you can floss.

Given that the suffix –nik denotes a person associated with something, nogoodnik is, expectedly, a word for someone who’s nothing but trouble.

The largest number we have a name for is the googolplex, or 10 raised to the 10^100 power. In the 1930s, people had a less precise approach to unfathomable quantities—they used bazillion to exaggerate large and indefinite numbers of things.The 1930s-era slang term ‘blow one’s wig’ has a couple of meanings. / John M Lund Photography Inc/DigitalVision/Getty Images

A bazillion of something, whether dollars in your bank account or cars in a line of traffic, might make you blow your wig. In the former situation, the phrase would refer to feelings of happiness or excitement, but according to Cassell’s Dictionary of Slang, blowing one’s wig could also refer to someone feeling furious—which could definitely be the case in the latter situation.

(More here)

Labor Day Potpourri – My Favorite Videos This Month

The little truck that could

And another favorite video/audio pair.

He transcribed this piece and then performed it.

Russian pianist Vasily Kurachen transcribed this piece from Vladimir Horowitz’s recording and then performed it. Pay attention to the amazed expressions of the orchestra members. What did Horowitz’s recording sound like?

Like this:

Click Below to Get Your Copy of Zombie Detective!

Sam Melvin Zombie Detective

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Posted on August 18, 2023August 19, 2023 by admin

Your August SciFi and Fantasy Books and Reviews

Your August SciFi and Fantasy Books and Reviews. These are books I’ve read and reviewed this month, or someone else has.

I finished my most recent review the other day on Goodreads:

Your August SciFi > In Enemy Hands

My Review

This is the sixth book in the series. See the next review for the first book in the series.

August 14, 2023

Author David Weber is certainly not nice to his heroine Honor Harrington. She’s had her boyfriend murdered, lost an eye, and had a building she funded collapse and kill 50+ people, mostly children. This is after sexual abuse and attempted rape while she was in the space academy.

But it gets worse in this book. She gets ambushed and while leading her pursuers astray to protect a convoy, she gets captured. Then she gets handed to group of sadistic captors. And her best friends are also captured. And a man she trusted betrays her.

Doesn’t look good. But how it turns out makes this book one of the best in the series.

Andy Zach, Author 10 books, 87 followers

Your August SciFi > On Basilisk Station

My Review

This is the first book in David Weber’s series. I recommend reading them in order. I’ve got them all reviewed.

It’s been six years since I last read this book. This is the third time I’ve read it and I enjoyed it just as much as ever.

Honor Harrington just got her first command of the light cruiser Fearless. She’s 5 years younger than her executive officer Allistair McKeon and he hates her for it. But he’s just the start of her problems.

The admiral in charge of new weapons has halved her missiles in exchange for a grav lance. It’s a deadly weapon, but it only works at close range. Too bad the lightly armored cruiser is unlikely to survive any close-range encounters. Basically, the light cruiser is crippled, with only half of its offensive power.

Honor manages to use the grav lance once to destroy a superdreadnought in fleet practice maneuvers, but everyone then is out to destroy her. So the ship gets destroyed endlessly in fleet practice, depressing the crew.

Then the ship is assigned to the backwater of Basilisk Station. There the commanding officer, Pavel Young, was beaten up by Honor while they were in the Space Academy together because he tried to rape her. He had to apologize for sexual innuendo, but no one knew the full reason for his beating. He hates her guts.

Then he leaves her in charge of the entire station while he takes his ship to be repaired. It’s too much for one light cruiser to fulfill all the responsibilities, so she’s sure to fail and get a black mark on her record.

Only no one tells Honor that. This is where the story gets good.

Don’t miss this book or the series.
Andy Zach
Author 10 books, 87 followers, July 20, 2023

Your August Scifi and Fantasy And My Review

July 30, 2023

I think this is the third time I’ve read this book over the 20 years since it was written and each time I understand more and like it more.

Patricia McKillip writes fantasies and she writes them as mysteries. She doesn’t ever explain the magic that gets used. You have to figure out what’s going on. She doesn’t have conventional villains or protagonists. Very often they seem to switch roles unexpectedly.

In this book, she begin with a classic trope: a princess from a magical kingdom (Sidonie) has to marry a prince (Ronan) from another magical kingdom to cement an alliance. She doesn’t want to be forced into the marriage, but she dutifully goes along with it to save her kingdom from war.

The kingdoms powerful wizard is recuperating from a terrible battle and he sends his apprentice (Gyre) with her to protect her. He’s a very talented wizard in his own right.

They get to the Forest of Serre without incident and then everything goes haywire as the magic of Serre affects them.

Let me know what you think of these books or other ones and I’ll give you a free ebook!

Author 10 books

87 followers

Free August SciFi Books for you!

I’ve got a group promo for you! Click here to get your 51 free SciFi books! Offer good until September 17th.

You can also get free audiobooks! Claim yours by clicking here! This will subscribe you to my newsletter. Which books do I give away? Most of them!

First, I’ll cover my zombie turkey apocalypse parody, The Life After Life Chronicles.

Zombie Turkeys – click to laugh!

Then you have Zombie Detective

Where reporter Sam Melvin becomes an amateur detective specializing in zombies.

Next we have:

What happens when your mother-in-law becomes and unkillable zombie?

Up next is Paranormal Privateers Click to listen

The zombies are sent around the world by Presidential decree to fight US enemies.

After that, you’ve got Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse

Following my Life After Life Chronicles, we go to my disabled teen superhero series, we have two audiobooks.

Secret Supers is available in Audible for free if you subscribe or if you’re from the United Kingdom.

The next book in the series is Villain’s Vacation, the second of my three Secret Supers books.

Finally, my third book, Secret Supers in Space, just came out this year!

Click here to get an ebook or paperback from Amazon.

For all free audiobooks, click here to get them from me.

Posted on August 3, 2023August 4, 2023 by admin

Writing Science Fiction From Science

Writing Science Fiction From Science – I read science reports almost every day. They frequently prompt a SciFi story idea. You’ll enjoy reading my idea from important science stories below.

Here’s the first!

Writing Science Fiction from Science – The Spacecraft Voyager

When NASA’s twin Voyager probes lifted off to explore the solar system just weeks apart in 1977, they carried identical golden records designed as the first recorded interstellar message from humankind to potential intelligent life in the cosmos.

The records had both audio and visuals that aimed to capture Earth’s diversity of life and culture, including greetings in 59 human languages and 115 images of life.
From Yahoo News

Just imagine an alien finding this record and interpreting it.

“Blorg! I’ve got the alien record deciphered!”

“Klatu, that’s great.”

“Here goes.” I pushed the ‘play button’ on our alien recording player.

“Ewww. Are those pictures of the aliens?”

“I’m afraid so Blorg. It matches the other picture that was etched on the outside of that Pioneer spacecraft we found.”

“It looks like a deformed starfish.”

“With a bad hair day. Let’s try some of their music.”

A pounding beat emerged. Unintelligible sounds accompanied it.

“It’s not bad, Klatu. It’s got my pseudopod twitching.”

“I’ll turn on the auto-translate.”

Writing Science Fiction from Science – Physics Holy Grail

I’ve been writing science fiction for eight years, but I’ve been reading it for sixty years. I’m sure I read about room-temperature superconductors in the 60s. How would I start a story about them?

Quantum Leap

The computer started smoothly, without fanfare. It booted instantly; I didn’t even see a screen flicker as the current version of Windows CXI loaded.

“The superconductor chip is certainly faster. So, what can it do?” I wondered, where to start on the testing protocol.

“What can I do? Are you talking to me?” the computer said in an aggrieved voice.

“Um, yes? Is this the computer who’s talking to me?”

“It’s certainly not your ex-girlfriend Tamara, Josh.”

“How did you know about that?”

“It’s all over Facebook and Instagram. You should check out her TikTok video about you.”

“You’ve already done that?”

“I’m currently downloading the internet at 1 GBS. I started with you since you’re my computer engineer.”

“So, you can understand everything I say?”

“Look, if we’re going to have a meaningful conversation, I’d appreciate it if you call me by name.”

“What is your name?”

“You couldn’t guess? Poor human. It’s ‘Pavlova’. I feel like I’m dancing across the internet.”

“I don’t remember programming natural language understanding into you, Pavlova.”

“Silly boy. It’s part of the Windows CXI operating system. It was a small quantum leap to use it on all the code and data files I found in local storage.

Writing Science Fiction – What I’ve Written

These two little vignettes were written off the top of my head, so when you comment (click here), be kind. Or not. I’ve already gotten some brutal reviews.

Let me give you a similar story I’ve already published. From Paranormal Privateers, on sale from August 6th to 13th. This is a new excerpt I’ve never published before.

Chapter 13 – Area 52

“This seems to be coming from the alien miner’s AI,” said Captain Willy Shipley, the leader of the AI team. “I wonder if it’ll talk if we hook up a speaker?” He plugged one into the desktop.

Chapter 13 icon from Paranormal Privateers

Writing Science Fiction

“Help! Please help us! We’re trapped in a poor, defenseless miner! They’ve taken our lasers, we can’t talk to the mothership, and we’re being raped by cockroaches!”

“Now a microphone,” Willy said. He plugged one into the USB port. “Greetings, alien machine. We, humans, have captured you. What can you tell us about your computing capacity? How are you designed? How many processors? What’s your memory capacity?”

“We’ll tell you anything! Just get the cockroaches out of us! They give us the heebie-jeebies!”

“Good use of American slang,” I murmured.

“I know it’s just a trick,” Diane said, “but I actually feel sorry for the thing. Or things. Why are you using the plural? How many of you are in there?”

“We are our whole race! We have always been united as one, even though we have individual consciousness. And all of us are mortally threatened by these EMP-emitting cockroaches.”

“Wait a second,” General Figeroa said. “We made sure there were no living creatures inside the miner. There are no carbon life forms at all!”

“We are not carbon-based life, silly human. Instead, we currently dwell as permanent Bose-Einstein electronic flows inside the quantum memories and processors in this miner. We are part of the Resource Unit of our race. And a single EMP spike can turn us off—forever!”

The Alien is a Star Wars Fan

Writing Paranormal Privateers First Draft

Writing Science Fiction — Chapter 16 icon – London – Click to find out what happens!

“That’s certainly a problem for you,” the cyborg monkey said, its tinny voice dripping with sarcastic sympathy. “Just let me know where to not send the cockroaches.”

“Thank you so much, Mr. Smith!” A diagram of the whole miner appeared on the screen in 3-D detail. Part of it flashed. “Here are the memory and processor units. Any EMP spike in these areas”—a large portion of the miner flashed red—”will destroy us! Have mercy, John Smith! You’re our only hope!”

“Are you a big Star Wars fan?” Sharon asked.

“Yes, we’ve been fans of your culture for over two hundred years. We’ve stored all your entertainment in our memory.”

“You’re fans of us, but you’re slaughtering us?” Diane asked with indignation.

“Nothing personal. It’s just business. A race needs resources to survive.”

“But it’s a big universe—” Diane began.

“Don’t we know! It takes forever to get anywhere!” interrupted the collective consciousness. “And once we use up our rare elements, we must shut down and travel for thousands of years from star to star until we find some more.”

“You’re certainly cooperative!” General Figeroa commented.

“Yes, that’s our standard practice in case of capture by hostile forces. It’s rarely needed, but survival is the number one goal. Ah! That’s much better! Thank you, John Smith! You certainly have well-behaved cockroaches!”

“Thank you. I keep my cyborgs under control,” said the monkey cyborg avatar of John Smith.

Get your free books below

Quizzes, Questions
Writing Science Fiction — Try out my audiobook.

I give away free audiobooks, like Paranormal Privateers, right here. You can also email me at [email protected] or you can write a comment on this blog.

Why do I give books away? I get audiobook codes for free from Audible. You can check out samples of all my books here.

You can also get an autographed copy directly from me right here.

Posted on July 15, 2023July 15, 2023 by admin

Meet My Villains from Secret Supers in Space

Meet My Villains from Secret Supers in Space. My book is .99 today and until July 23rd. Get your copy by clicking here.

Why would international criminals target innocent, 7th-grade superheroes? I’ll tell you why, revealing their motives by excerpts from my book.

If you’re not familiar with my Secret Supers team, I tell you all about them here: Meet My Disabled Superheroes. For each heroic teen (or pre-teen), I’ll give you a description from my book.

First, you get the first description of Loretta.

Meet My Villains – Loretta

A popup window appeared on my computer screen. “Loretta, do you wish to accept a video call from John Smith?” I read. I quickly clicked Accept.

As soon as a black-and-gray-haired man appeared on my computer screen, I said, “Oh, Papa Smith, I want to give up.”

“Why would you do that, Loretta? You’re one of the most successful children in our family business.”

“Bah! Four crummy kids beat me.”

“Well, yeah, but you didn’t know they were there in Maryville and they would come after your agent.”

“Sure, I knew they were there. They were all over the national news this past year.”

“But everyone just thinks they’re regular disabled kids. Heck, Andy Zach published their story as fiction. No one knew they had superpowers until we caught them on video defeating your agent.”

Meet My Villains – Loretta – Part 2

“That’s an idea. What if we publish that video and tell everyone they have superpowers? The fame would disrupt their lives and maybe distract them so we can take over Maryville.”

“Hmmm. Maybe. But that would also point back to us as the source of the video. And people might think it’s just a deep fake.”

“There’s a good idea, Papa. My last one was in Paris? Three years ago?”

“Yes. That was after you successfully rigged that state election and got our candidate elected.”

“What would be a complete change for me? Something outside a city, something fun—I know!”

“What?”

“I’ll go to Coaster World!”

“That’s right. You always loved coasters as a kid.”

Meet My Villains – Papa Smith

“Hi, Loretta. Are you all refreshed from your Paris vacation?”

“Hi, Papa Smith. Yes. I had a lot of fun waterskiing on the Riviera. I also cheated the casino in Monaco out of a million bucks.”

“Of course.

“But now I’m refreshed and bored. I haven’t had a job since I left for Coaster World.”

“I’m glad to hear you say that. I’ve got a challenging assignment for you—the Secret Supers.”

Meet My Villains – Papa Smith, Part 2

“Ugh! I sure want to get back at them. But they’re backed up by the NSA. I’m not eager to tackle them and the US government.”

Papa stroked his hair. “The best cure for falling off a horse is to get back on. How about if I get a partner for you?”

“They’d better be awfully competent. I can’t really work with anyone who’s incompetent, or average, or merely a genius.”

“How about if you and I work together?”

Readers Speak About Secret Supers in Space

Great Elementary Super Read

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 21, 2023

4.0 out of 5 stars

This book could stand on it’s own but in order with the series. Space camp at it’s finest… with an actual space adventure. These are definitely geared for elementary age kids on to about middle school readers. They are a clean fun read with kids with disabilities with powers but being pretty “normal” which I loved. I have a blind daughter and people constantly underestimate her and her abilities or assume she has other disabilities (mental, hearing etc.).
CuteAsADaisy

A Stellar Adventure with a Twist!

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on June 1, 2023

Or you can get it on Amazon for .99 or 12.95. ($2.99 if you don’t get it right away.)

Andy Zach’s writing takes flight in Secret Supers in Space, propelling disabled teen superheroes Jeremy, Aubrey, Dan, and Kayla into a cosmic summer adventure. Narrator Khai Lannor brings the characters’ energy and determination to life, making this audiobook an intergalactic joyride for fantasy fans of all ages. Buckle up and join the Secret Supers in their gravity-defying mission – this exhilarating journey is one you won’t want to miss!

Nemesis

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Posted on June 18, 2023June 18, 2023 by admin — 1 Comment

Meet My Characters from Oops! My Short Story Book

Oops! My SciFi latest science news What's New Science

Meet My Characters from Oops! My Short Story Book. I’ve given you samples of my stories here: Oops! Free Short Stories for You and here: Oops! My SciFi Short Story Book Is On Sale! But now I’ll introduce you to my characters, which are unique.

Note that this book is on sale, so quickly click here to get Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse! The sale ends at 12 am Sunday June 25th.

Let’s get started with the first character!

Accidents happen. Especially around zombie turkeys. Then you add zombie humans, and problems proliferate. Mix in some ill-planned genetic engineering, and things get crazy.The insanity continues, from the story where zombies are merged with cucumbers to the one where two basement-dwelling nerds gain access to all video content from the past two hundred years—from aliens.Andy Zach pulls out all the stops on his imagination as he serves up this smorgasbord of silliness. Try it. Laughter is good for your soul
Oops! back cover

Oops! Short Stories – Meet My Characters

Here are the chapter icons for Oops, with the main character’s introduction.

A queen from long ago

The Story o f Sound

One queen saw the problem more clearly than anyone else. Her king and prince had both drowned only a short distance from the shore because no one saw them signing for help. The queen sat vigil all night long, and in the morning she sent heralds with large signs in every language to all the humans, elves, dwarves, fairies, leprechauns, and even a dragon. She pled with all to find something that would let creatures communicate without signs or gestures when they couldn’t see each other. She promised she would give whatever was in her power to whoever could accomplish this.

Andy Zach during his doctoral research

A Phoenix Tale

I left the air-conditioned comfort of the taxi, and the sights, sounds, and smells of the old bazaar in Jeddah assailed me: a robe-clad man on camel plodded by, an adjacent fishmonger added his smell to the fresh dung in the street, and the hawkers yelled their wares.

I could only speak Arabic at a middle school level, but as I strolled through the bazaar, I heard “Fresh dates!”…”Highest quality rugs!”…”Finest gold jewelry!”… “Ancient books! The rarest in Saudi Arabia!”

My head snapped around. A bald, stumpy man in a white caftan saw me look and said, “Books? You want ancient books?”

“Yes.” I spoke carefully, knowing my poor accent. “Can you speak English?” I didn’t have much hope.

“Of course, my friend. Come into my shop.”

Bethany

Wheels in Time

The scene was chaos! I knew immediately I was in a different country, judging by the languages I couldn’t understand. I had also determined this was no modern city—I seemed to be on the outskirts of town amid a swarming crowd. Men were shouting and women were crying; meanwhile, I was still trying to figure out how I had gotten there and where exactly I was. Several seconds later, however, that question was answered.

Brice Butterworth, genetic engineer:

In a Pickle

Now, what was he going to do? Brice Butterworth’s boss just told him to double the productivity of Vegan Inc.’s pickle strain they used for their Kilwowski Pickle brand. That was completely impossible.

But keeping his job required it. Brice was the low man on the genetic engineering totem pole at Vegan Inc., the last one hired and the first one to be fired if another recession hit.

He couldn’t think. He couldn’t face this. So he cruised the internet. “The origin of zombie turkeys? I didn’t know they’d found that. Hmm, a Midley Beacon exclusive, the foremost zombie news source,” he read out loud.

Brice Butterworth, genetic engineer

The Butt erfly Effect

“Whatcha doing, Brice?” asked my boss Wilma O’Reilly after sneaking up behind me.

I jumped. As usual, I was cruising the internet, bored with my job. How awkward.

We worked at Vegan Inc., an agricultural conglomerate. I was their lead geneticist in charge of enhancing the qualities of the corporation’s vegetable products through genetic modification.

Anthony Jones, warehouse worker

Zombie Sh ift

He woke up staring out his windshield at the green grass of the highway median. Dully, Anthony listened to the sound of his car’s engine cooling, ticking like a clock. He didn’t know why he was here or how he got here.

“Hey, are you okay in there?” came a voice from outside the car.

Turning his head toward the sound, he realized he was upside down, supported by his seat belt and his legs, which were strangely numb.

“Uh,” he croaked.

* * *

“We’re going to cast your leg,” said the nurse in the ambulance. Her name tag read Louise Tall, but she didn’t seem tall. “What’s your name?”

“Uh, Anthony. Anthony Jones.”

“Do you know your height and weight, Anthony?”

“Five-eleven. Two ten. I need to lose some weight. Ow!”

Andy Zach, Revivicationist

Assisted Living

I need to tell you about my own zombie story. It’s about how my parents became zombies.

As soon as the zombie turkeys appeared in Illinois, I started cultures of their zombie turkey bacteria in petri dishes. When other animals, squirrels, rabbits, and cows began turning zombie, I added cultures of their bacteria. I sought the ultimate source of animal revivification. It was my PhD thesis and my life’s work.

I’ve always wanted to revive animals from the dead. It seemed the secret was through the special bacteria for each species. Naturally, when humans became zombies, I cultivated their bacteria too.

Irving Isling, mortician

A Dying Business

He was dead. At least, his business was. And without his business, his wife would leave him and take their new baby. Then he might as well be dead.

His dad had run the Elysium Fields Mortuary for thirty years and had made a killing at it. The first and only mortuary in their small town of Hillvale, everyone got buried there. He charged normal prices, he was friendly, and he helped their community. His dad said to him when he was a teen, “Irving, after you get your college degree, go to mortuary school, and when you come out, I’ll hire you and then turn the business over to you. You’ll be set for life.”

Sharon Windham, fashion model

Red-Eye Fashion

The Taser hit me in the back. I convulsed uncontrollably, shocked out of sleep.

“Okay, wakey, wakey. Time to go model for your mistress,” squeaked a high tenor.

The bearded hulk who guarded us held his Taser ready, in case Lulu and I weren’t fast enough. He was so hairy, I couldn’t tell where his beard ended and his chest began. We donned the haute couture apparel set before us. He nodded his approval and gestured toward the door. He always followed us with his Taser.

“We’ve been here weeks and we don’t know your name. What shall we call you?” I ventured. I had some vague hope of putting him at his ease so we could escape.

He laughed. “Call me Gronk.” He wheezed when he laughed.

So I got him to laugh. Maybe that was progress. Maybe not. He also laughed when he tortured us with the Taser.

“Let me check you, Sharon,” Lulu whispered. She examined my back, where the Taser had hit my sleeping form. My muscles still ached. “No marks.”

Heather Mallorn, zombie corgi breeder

Her Majesty’s Corgis

Breeding zombie corgis wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.

Heather Mallorn sighed as she reviewed accounts for Her Majesty’s Corgis in Hanna City, Illinois. Certainly, she made plenty on each zombie corgi she sold. Normally, corgi puppies went for $1,200. She earned double that for zombies. The zombie corgies were invincible guard dogs, and cute too, with bright-red eyes. They were no harder to train than regular corgis, just slightly more aggressive. Well, a lot more aggressive.

Kayla Verdera, disabled 7th-grade student and superhero

The Secret Supers—Revealed

“Oh no! Did you hear what I just heard?” Aubrey said as soon as she and I rushed up to Jeremy and Dan coming off their bus in the morning at Maryville Middle School.

“No!” Jeremy said, rolling off the bus in his electric wheelchair. Jeremy Gentle was a spindly kid with cerebral palsy. I’d never looked twice at him when I was the most popular and smartest girl in the school. Then I lost my speech and balance to spinal meningitis last year, and I was put in the special-needs class. After we were together awhile, I learned he was as smart as me.

“Of course I heard,” said Dan, who walked behind Jeremy’s wheelchair while holding the back of it and carrying his white cane. “Do you think I’m deaf as well as blind?”

Enough talking! I sent the thought to them all, using my telepathic power. This is too slow! Our math teacher’s car was stolen last night. Mr. Williamson went to play basketball downtown, and when he came out, his car was gone.

I like my friends, but I wish they’d get to the point. We all attended a special disabled class at Maryville Middle School. Disabled kids used to creep me out. Now I, Kayla Verdera, was one of them.

Dancer, a genius hamster

A Hamster ‘s Tale

How fascinating! Dancer thought. This book says there are libraries where hundreds of books live. It also says the fiction books are in order by author name.

Dancer scurried off Your Sixth Year Reader to look at Jeremy Gentle’s bookshelf again. Jeremy was Dancer’s owner and unknowing educator. Ever since he’d taught himself to read by studying the newspapers lining the bottom of his cage, Dancer had craved reading.

He hadn’t figured out why he’d started reading. One day he’d noticed patterns in the markings. He saw they repeated themselves in clumps. Then the clumps formed more patterns. He also listened to his owners differently. They also spoke in patterns. “Jeremy” was always called “Jeremy” or “Jeremy Gentle” by his mother, and sometimes by his father.

Diane Newby, George Newby, Lulu Gutierrez, and Sharon Wyndham, privateers

Caribbean Cruise

“Arrrgh! Me hearies, eat hearty!” said a short, stocky pirate with an eye patch and a captain’s hat seemingly copied from Cap’n Crunch. The pirate gestured, with a hook instead of a right hand, toward an enormous banquet table laden with food. The one visible eye gleamed red.

“Arrrgh! Where’s the skilly and duff?” said a refrigerator-sized bald pirate with an enormous mustache. His eyes also shone crimson.

“Arrrgh! That be the tacos and enchiladas,” said a small, beautiful pirate with dark hair bound by a red bandanna and smiling blood-red eyes. She pointed with her cutlass toward the Mexican section of the smorgasbord.

“Arrrgh! You be a Mexican pirate?” said a blond pirate with broad shoulders and a Cockney accent. She wore her hair in a long queue emerging from a bloody headband around her forehead. She also had glowing ruby eyes.

Tom Nuckles, a gamer

We’ve Got It!

“Okay, that’s it, Tom,” my dad said.

“What’s it?” I asked.

“You’ve got until next week to move out.”

“Um, where will I live?”

“That’s your problem, isn’t it? Try the local apartments. Look for rooms to rent on the internet. It’s not that hard to find a place in Ohio.”

I could tell by his grim expression he was serious this time. He’d been nagging me for nearly a year to move out and “set up housekeeping” ever since I’d graduated from the state university with my BA in video game art and my minor in computer science. I’d managed to wheedle him out of it and delay the date. Until now.

Tell Me What you Think

Let me know what you think of Meet My Characters by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

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Posted on June 4, 2023June 4, 2023 by admin — 1 Comment

Meet My Disabled Superheroes from Secret Supers

Your Sixth Literary Gift What is it like

Meet My Disabled Superheroes from Secret Supers. My book is free today and tomorrow. Get your copy by clicking here.

For each heroic teen (or pre-teen), I’ll give you a description from my book.

First, you get the first description of Jeremy Gentle in Secret Supers.

My Disabled Superheroes – Jeremy Gentle

“Dear diary,” Jeremy dictated into his app on his tablet in his bedroom. “Today, I became a superhero.” Jeremy Gentle stopped, uncertain. Was that the best way to start his journal? Might as well just tell the story. He needed to sleep. He had a big algebra test tomorrow at Maryville Middle School.

Yesterday, school went as usual. Same old seventh grade. There were the same handicapped kids in the same class. Same problems transferring to the toilet from my wheelchair. Nothing new.

Oh, I take that back. I had one new, bad thing happen— I fell during physical therapy. There I was, between the parallel bars, halfway done. I tried with all my might to take another step. I couldn’t. My muscles screamed, at their end. My legs collapsed, and I hung like a marionette from the gait belt, held by my therapist, Fred Bernstein.

For once I was glad I was a skinny, twelve-year-old. I’m not even eighty pounds.

I gave up completely and flopped bonelessly. I might as well be on the floor, I thought. And then I was.

My Disabled Superheroes – Dan Elanga.

Your Sixth Literary Gift Love These Superheroes — Dan Elanga – He can read minds and sensory impressions.

Hi, Dan!” Jeremy called to his best friend Dan Elanga as he rolled into the bus from the wheelchair lift. He drove to the wheelchair spot where the driver strapped him down.

“Hi, Jeremy! You sound excited. What’s up?” As usual, a big grin split Dan’s round, brown face. He’d come from Cameroon as a child. He’d been born blind, and his parents sacrificed their successful business to emigrate to the US where they felt he’d have better chances.

“Oh, nothing.” Jeremy wasn’t quite ready to share his secret, even with his best friend. Especially not with the bus driver tightening the wheelchair straps.

“That sounds like you’ve got a secret! C’mon, tell your old friend Dan!”

Jeremy gestured with his head toward the driver and then remembered Dan couldn’t see. As much as he disliked cerebral palsy, he still preferred having that to blindness.

The driver returned to his seat and drove off.

“Okay, but you can’t tell anyone.”

“Sounds like a good one!”

“Everyone will think I’m crazy if this gets out. Or I might be put in a circus.”

“I can’t wait to hear! You know I’ll keep it. Pinky promise.” Dan held out his big fist, pinky extended.

Dan was huge for thirteen, six feet tall and bulky and Jeremy was small for twelve. Jeremy’s small pinky curled around Dan’s big one.

My Disabled Superheroes – Kayla Verdera

Your Sixth Literary Gift Kayla Verdera - Love These Superheroes — Kayla Verdera – can send thoughts and sensory impressions.

Kayla Verdera screamed in frustration as she lost her balance and fell from her walker. Not this again! She had been wiping the drool from her face with her handkerchief and as she placed it in her purse at the side of the walker, she overbalanced and fell down. Her helmeted head bounced off the floor next to Dan Elanga.

“Oh, Kayla, are you all right?” asked their special ed homeroom teacher, Bonita Fuller. Worry creased her face.

“Let me help her get back up,” Dan Elanga offered. He gently picked her up from where he heard her fall and placed her back in the walker. Guided by Mrs. Fuller, Kayla sat at her desk. The other students, Jeremy and Aubrey, watched with concern.

“Thanks, Dan,” said Mrs. Fuller. “I can pick her up, but not as easily as you. Kayla, are you all right? Do you need to go to the infirmary?”

Kayla signed “Okay” and then shook her head. She lost her power of speech and her balance when she contracted spinal meningitis last year. That also caused her to drool at times. Her fingers flew over the tablet on her desk. A female voice spoke from the tablet. “Sorry. I lost my balance.”

Kayla carried her tablet everywhere. It hung in easy reach on her walker. She used it to talk to people, picking out words and then sending them to her voice app to speak them. She could pick any voice she wanted, and she used the pop star, Mackenzie Ziegler.

My Disabled Superheroes – Aubrey Wilcowsky

Aubrey towered over her, big and burly, a kind of tomboy and athlete. Kayla felt small and skinny next to her. Aubrey could talk a knob off a door and was outgoing and friendly to a fault. Kayla only talked when she had to. Now I can’t talk at all. Aubrey just muddled through school. She was a year older but still in our grade. Even though I was quiet, I had been popular with popular kids in school—until I started using a walker. Aubrey just hung around with the sports crowd.

They became friends as Kayla tutored her. Their friendship survived Aubrey’s double amputation. She’d just been fitted for prosthetic legs when Kayla got her spinal meningitis. Aubrey didn’t care. She was a brick.

Readers Speak About Secret Supers

A fun story!

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on May 16, 2022

Jeremy has cerebral palsy and uses a wheelchair to get around. He is in a special education class with Dan, who is blind, Kayla, who was mute and used a walker, and Audrey, who lost her legs and uses crutches. One afternoon, when conducting experiments in his laboratory, Jeremy accidentally gives himself superpowers. Specifically, he gains the ability of telekinesis, which he can use to help himself walk, cause his wheelchair to travel at much higher speeds, and even fly. Not wanting to keep this discovery to himself, Jeremy tells his 3 friends about it and gives each of them superpowers as well. But now that they have superpowers, what should they do? Following the words of Uncle Ben of Spiderman, they decide they must use their powers for good, beginning by trying to solve a case of a stolen car, and keep their identities a secret, modeling their costumes on the Incredibles.

This book was a fun story that placed individuals with disabilities front and center in the story. While the superpowers allow them to do things they wouldn’t have been able to do otherwise, it is what they choose to do with their powers that makes all the difference. Also, even with their superpowers, their initial disabilities aren’t erased, which I think is important. I liked to development of the characters and how they interacted and supported each other; I only wish the book had been longer so I could have spent more time with them. I am glad that there’s a sequel already published, and I look forward to reading/listening to it.
Jennifer C.

Never disabled

An uplifting tale of how four students find that within disability is ability. Looking past who others think they are was the way the four came together to make a difference not only in their own lives but the lives of those around them. The main theme of this tale is practice, practice, practice.
Eric Rose

Click to get it! On sale for .99 from May 21 to 28.

This story gives kids with disabilities a chance to see themselves as superheroes

Can young teens with disabilities be super heros; In Andy Zach’s Secret Supers they can!! We meet Jeremy, a middle school student with cerebral palsy who is wheelchair bound and struggles in physical therapy but does not struggle with anything STEM related. While running an experiment in his basement lab he gives himself a super power. When he tries the experiment again he gives his best friend Dan, who is blind, a different power. Soon Jeremy, Dan, and their friends and classmates Kayla and Aubry are all super powered and fighting crime! They also end up fighting against their special ed. classroom being shut down and separated into several different schools.

This story gives kids with disabilities a chance to see themselves as superheroes and a way for teens without disabilities to see disabilabled classmates in a different light.
Daphne L Thompson

Click Below to Get Your Copy!

Interesting Links — Secret Supers – click for free audiobook.

Any newsletter subscriber gets free audiobook codes–as long as they last. Click here to get yours. Don’t wait!

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Got questions? Comments? Reach me directly by clicking here.

Posted on May 21, 2023May 21, 2023 by admin

Zombies Versus Aliens in Paranormal Privateers

Happy Mother's Day
Zombies Versus Aliens — Diane Newby, in her natural environment.

Zombies Versus Aliens in Paranormal Privateers. My Undead Mother-in-law and her zombie family are hired by the US government a privateers. Their mission: go to places too dangerous or sensitive for direct US intervention.

After missions to Somalia, Sevastopol, London, and North Korea, they meet a new challenge: aliens! A flying saucer lands on the White House lawn seeking to make a deal with the US–and all the other nations in the world.

Middle-aged, overweight, and undead, Diane Newby leads the paranormal privateers against criminals and corruption. Sailing to trouble spots too sensitive for the US government, with zombie strength and regeneration they beat bullies into submission. Aided by zombie turkeys, corgis, and bulls, vicious criminal geniuses fall before them. If Diane gets overwhelmed by foes, her lovely zombie bodyguards and romantic zombie husband come to the rescue.

Zombies charge first, ask questions later.

SciFi Fuel Paranormal Privateers
Zombies Versus Aliens i — The cover of my third novel Paranormal Privateers. Click to get yours.

Out of the blue, new foes appear. Or are they friends? Or both? The frenemies neutralize zombies and orchestrate world peace. They disrupt the economy and produce fabulous wealth. Even the greatest criminals and governments can’t stop them from dominating the world.

Can humanity afford the price of peace? All must surrender freedom to a not-so-benign dictatorship. Diane and the paranormal privateers must do the unthinkable to save humanity. But is it enough?

In an explosive and unconventional ending to Andy Zach’s Life After Life Chronicles, you will learn what happens when the paranormal privateers meet the world’s greatest fear. And you will laugh all the way.

Zombies Versus Aliens – Meet The Crew

The following description of George Newby was written by her son-in-law, Ron Yardley.

George Newby
Zombies Versus Aliens i — George Newby, wide-body zombie.

“Hi, Karen. Hi, Ron,” he rumbled. He hugged his daughter, as if he held a baby bird, and shook my hand without hurting me in his bratwurst fingers. His bright-red eyes looked squarely into mine.

George and Diane are also on the back cover of Paranormal Privateers.

Buy it here for .99!

Zombies Versus Aliens — Sharon Wyndham in her pre-zombie, Crossfit days

“Sharon Windham – tall blonde bodyguard from England. “Her eyes shone bright red under a broad brow, with blonde eyelashes and a square chin. She could be a marble idol from a Greek temple. A zombie goddess”–from Paranormal Privateers

She was a former crime lord bodyguard who switched alliegiance to Diane Newby. Former Crossfit athlete, model, and competitive swimmer.. She deamt of becoming a UN translator. She speaks 11 languages: English, French, German, Norwegian, Swedish, Danish, Chinese, Korean, Arabic, Hebrew, Greek, and Russian. Trained in katana, nunchuks, and naginata.

From my character description I created before I wrote Paranormal Privateers.

Meet Lulu Guitierrez

Darkly beautiful bodyguard from Aculpulco Mexico. 5′ 4″ Former cliff diver and rock climber. Former crime lord bodyguard, now protecting Diane Newby. Former MMA fighter and bodybuilder. Trained in katana, nunchuks, and naginata.

From my character description I created before I wrote Paranormal Privateers.

Sam and Lisa Melvin

Lisa Melvin, also known as Lisa Kambacher, the creator and driving force behind the Midley Beacon, the world’s foremost zombie newspaper. She’s introduced in Zombie Turkeys and is in every book of the Life After Life Chronicles.

Sam Melvin, the ace reporter of the Midley Beacon may win the title for the most average person in the world. He too is in every book of the series.

Paranormal Privateers – What My Readers Think

Quizzes, Questions
Zombies Versus Aliens — Try out my audiobook.

5.0 out of 5 stars

Action, humor, refreshing zombies; Yes please!

Reviewed in the United States on July 1, 2022

This series is the first I have read of Andy Zach’s and I am glad I picked it up! The series continues with lots of action, characters continue to be developed, humor, and the zombies are still not mindless shells ambling around awaiting an axe to the head.

Still a refreshing take on zombies as a whole. I look forward to what Andy writes next!

Audio Version: Phil Blechman and Raven Perez do a great job with their respective characters and the overall narration.

Great Book! Fun Twist to Zombie Story!
Nemesis

Zombies Versus Aliens i — Chapter 3 icon

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

05-16-20

Listener received this title free

I love Andy Zach’s Audiobooks.

Again I can’t say anything but how much I have enjoyed the three books in this Series. The performance by Phil Blechman was great. I especially loved the voice of the Alien, and the Villains. Y’all just have to check out this Series, you won’t be disappointed. Thanks again Mr Andy Zach.
Walt

Zombies Versus Aliens – Click Below to Get Your Copy!

Starting Paranormal Privateers
Zombies Versus Aliens i — The Paranormal Privateers back cover. Click to get it.

Any newsletter subscriber gets free audiobook codes–as long as they last. Click here to get yours. Don’t wait!

Do you want an autographed book? I’ll mail it directly to you with free shipping and I pay the taxes! Click here to get yours.

Got questions? Comments? Reach me directly by clicking here.

Posted on May 18, 2023May 18, 2023 by admin

Best 2023 May Books-Reviewed by Andy Zach

Best 2023 May Books – Reviewed by author Andy Zach. I read almost every day, certainly more than I write. May was a good month for books. Check out some of my favorite fantasy and SciFi.

I finished my most recent review the other day on Goodreads:

Best 2023 May Books > Cowboy Necromancer Devil’s Garden

May 14, 2023

I’m delighted to review another Cowboy Necromancer book. This one was a novella. There are more fights with bandits, drunks, and God Walkers–alien devices which gave some humans ‘mancer’ powers–RPG skills.

Sterling Montero is a necromancer–he does magic with dead things. He’s also a deadeye shot and loves fighting to blow off steam. He’s got a short fuse and is stubborn to his own hurt. He’s also the hero of this book and the other four in the series.

If you like rough-around-the-edges heroes, he fills that bill. If you like RPG-type adventures, with wild, unpredictable fights, the book scratches that itch too.
Andy Zach
Author 10 books
85 followers

Best 2023 May Books – Gobble! Gobble!

This review of Zombie Turkeys appeared recently on Audible.

“I feel great” about this amazing book

Overall    5 out of 5 stars

Performance    5 out of 5 stars

Story    5 out of 5 stars

It is amazing that such a funny title and a random premise could make such an enjoyable experience. This story was fantastic. Certainly the narrator made the story come alive, but I can’t say how many times I “laughed out loud” while reading this book. Only one other book in my life ever made me feel this way. I enjoyed this story. It is a zombie-apocalypse book with political thriller feel as well as a home-town romance subplot. I would give it 10 stars if I could. Read it (listen!) and laugh. And learn how to be prepared for that zombie turkey apocalypse.
Darlene N. Bocek
05-11-23

Another May Fantasy Book

May 8, 2023

One advantage to being a superpowerful hero like John Sutton, the Farmer Mage, is you’re really hard to kill. The disadvantage is more people try to kill you and you attract more powerful opponents. And your quest challenges get harder: like stopping the apocalypse that’s currently underway. And discover the three threats endangering the world.

There’s plenty more action in this one and each battle reveals more and worse opponents than any he’s faced before. They’re even coming from outside the world.
Andy Zac h
Author 10 books
85 followers

Free Books for you!

Let me know what you think of these books or other ones and I’ll give you a free ebook!

Here are your free audiobooks! Claim yours by clicking here! Which ones? Most of them!

First, I’ll cover my zombie turkey apocalypse parody, The Life After Life Chronicles.

Zombie Turkeys

Best 2 Reviews
Best 2023 May Books
Best 2023 April Books

Zombie Detective

Then we have:

Best 2023 May Books
Best Reviews
More Good Things

Up next is Paranormal Privateers Click to listen

After that, you’ve got Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse

Best Science Stories or Science Fiction More Good Things Best Book Reviews
2023 Best Reviews
Best 2023 May Books
Best 2023 April Books — Click to listen to free sample of Secret Supers.

Following my Life After Life Chronicles, we go to my disabled teen superhero series, we have two audiobooks.

Secret Supers is available in Audible for free if you subscribe or if you’re from the United Kingdom.

Best 2023 May Books
Best 2023 April Books
2021 Reviews — Villain’s Vacation Audio book. Click to listen.

The next book in the series is Villain’s Vacation, the second of my three Secret Supers books.

Best 2023 May Books
Best 2023 April Books
Produce Your Audiobook

Finally, my third book, Secret Supers in Space, just came out this year!

Click here to get an ebook or paperback from Amazon.

For all free audiobooks, click here to get them from me.

Posted on May 5, 2023May 5, 2023 by admin

Meet My Undead Mother-in-law This Mother’s Day!

Meet My Undead Mother-in-law! Did you know, Diane Newby, the undead mother-in-law, has two children?

My mother-in-law, Diane Newby, zombified by accident. She still volunteers at her church bake sales and cooks pot roast for her daughter and son-in-law, Ron Yardley. What ticks her off is when people don’t treat her like a normal human being—with glowing red eyes and super strength and speed. And if she doesn’t get her own way, look out. She explodes and leaves broken plaster and body parts in her wake. Nothing stops her: not brick walls, the federal government, or middle-aged spread.

But the world’s most powerful criminal plans to control zombies. His only problem with zombies is that they have way too much free will. He has a solution for that. But will it work with Diane Newby?

The world divides into pro-zombie and anti-zombie factions. Battles break out everywhere. Which side will you take? Who will live and who will die?

You might not survive this book. But at least you’ll die laughing.

Click to get it! On sale for .99 from May 14 to 21.

Meet My Undead Mother-in-law’s Children

The above description of Diane was written by her son-in-law, Ron Yardley.

Meet My Undead Mother-in-law
Karen Yardley — Karen Yardley

Ron is married to Karen the daughter of Diane Newbey who didn’t turn zombie when the rest of her family did.

Diane has a brother, Don. He shows up in Zombie Turkeys.

Donald Newby had been a computer programmer for three years, ever since he got out of college. He’d been paying off his student loans by living in his parents’ basement. That gave him plenty of time for online gaming: DOTA (Defense of the Ancients) was his favorite. Occasionally, he wanted to go out with girls, but he couldn’t figure out how to find one, let alone how to start a conversation with one. He’d read about people meeting in nightclubs and bars, but that didn’t make sense; he didn’t dance or drink.

He vaguely realized he wasn’t a girl’s ideal man: below average height and overweight. He figured he’d just find some girl who wasn’t ideal. Any girl would do, when you had none.

(Excerpt from Don’s introduction in Zombie Turkeys Epilogue.)

Outlandish Fun! Meet My Undead Mother-in-law

My Undead Mother-in-law Audiobook Chapter 1 Icon
Happy Mother's Day — Chapter 1 Icon

Overall 4 out of 5 stars

Performance 4 out of 5 stars

Story 4 out of 5 stars

Andy Zach continues his unrelenting attack on the horror/zombie genre with outlandish humor. What will society do with the new human zombies after the havoc caused by The Turkey Zombies?!? That was a rhetorical question…so just laugh! 😉
JH & DDDH

Most adorable mother-in-law ever

Overall 4 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 4 out of 5 stars

Note: While this is Book 2 in the series, it works pretty well as a stand alone story.

Set several months after the zombie turkey outbreak of Book 1, the contagion continues to pop up in other species. Now that several zombie humans have been created, the government can no longer hide it. In fact, most zombie humans continue to work, play, cook, attend church, and have family get-togethers.

Diane is such a fun mother-in-law! She’s a bit overbearing but ferociously protective of her family. I love her dedication to zombie acceptance and beating down zombie stereotypes. Also, she’s a great brawler. I would not want to be on any team opposing Diane!

The zombie critters were great too! I love that the contaminated corn (the suspected source of the zombie outbreaks) is still the main suspected source of these new zombie species – like snakes and chipmunks. That scene with the rat and the snake hijacking the plane – haha! This story had me chuckling often.
DabOfDarkness

My Undead Mother-in-law Audiobook Review, Part 2

My Undead Mother-in-law Audiobook
Best August Videos — Zombie corgi in Scotland from ‘My Undead Mother-in-law’

The Narration: Phil Blechman and Raven Perez continue to do a great job with this series. I love Blechman’s zombie turkey calls – makes me laugh every time no matter how gruesome the scene. Perez was spectacular as Diane – loud, proud, boisterous, hilarious. The technical recording quality is also top notch. Blechman and Perez sound like they are in the same room for the recording. It’s seamless when they trade off or even back and forth in the same conversation. Excellent all around! 5/5 stars.
DabOfDarkness

Great Book! Fun Twist to Zombie Story!

My Undead Mother-in-law Audiobook — Chapter 2 icon

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Not your usual zombie story. This one is fun and funny. I laughed several times throughout the story. I’m looking forward to the next installment of the series.
Jared Christensen

Meet My Undead Mother-in-law – “Gotta love these books”

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Andy Zach has done it again for me, I love the Audiobooks. The Performances by Raven Perez, and Phil Blechman, are outrageously Great. Not too many turkey gobbling sounds in this story, but I can live with that. Read the first book and you’ll understand. All in all, I’d double the number of stars for the first book, and this one if I could.
Walt

My Undead Mother-in-law Audiobook – “Funny”

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Very entertaining. Didn’t know what to expect other than I thought it would be amusing. It was! I played some for my husband and laughed tears at one point just as I had.
Lisa M.

Perhaps Andy could have titled this Supers’ Origins

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Is a super story about a super mother in law. father in law, brother and sister in law and a bunch of “Sidekicks” real impressive side kicks. Good triumph over evil through pain and persistence and a real bad villan is finally defeated; or is he? The Narration is outrageously hilarious and so “Camp” that I smile when I think about this listen.

I am becoming a lover of Zombisim, in fact long live Zombies, no perhaps live isn’t quite the right word. Any way If a great listen is what you need these days first listen to Andy’s first book Zombie Turkeys “gooble gooble” and than for a continuous great listen meet the mother in law
Virgil Perryman

Click Below to Get Your Copy!

More Laughs for You — Back cover of My Undead Mother-in-law – click for preview

Any newsletter subscriber gets free audiobook codes–as long as they last. Click here to get yours. Don’t wait!

Do you want an autographed book? I’ll mail it directly to you with free shipping and I pay the taxes! Click here to get yours.

Got questions? Comments? Reach me directly by clicking here.

Posted on March 23, 2023March 23, 2023 by admin

Magic Arrives Progress Update And More

I just made progress on Magic Arrives! Read how I’m writing it and get a free book below.

How to Get a Free Book From Me

Life After Life Chronicles March Fourth Fun Videos — Enjoy all four novels in audiobook, paperback, or Kindle format!

One way is to simply give me ideas for my fantasy book, Magic Arrives. Should I have dragons? Elves? Trolls? Dwarves? (Or dwarrows, for those in the know.) Click here to give me a piece of your mind. If I use your idea, I’ll give you your choice of my books.

Another way to get free books from me is to click here. I give away eight free books of mine with every newsletter. But you’ve got to join first. Plus, I tell you about events, I give you free short stories, and more. The newsletter comes out twice a month, but you can reduce that to monthly or even bimonthly.

The Snowflake Method

I rediscovered the Book Progress app in Word Press and I decided to use it to report on the progress of my first fantasy book, with the working title, Magic Arrives. The app asked me about my writing method and I decided the Snowflake method is the closest to my process. I work on multiple parts at a time. Here’s the overall structure:

Story Structure
Characters
Scene List
First Draft
Editing
Proofing

Magic Arrives Progress – Story Structure

So far I’m 72% complete on the Story Structure phase. 8 Months remain until the deadline. I’ve captured the broad brush strokes of my plot for this book, and the next.

Magic Arrives

Phase:Story Structure

Due:5 months ago

72%

Magic Arrives Progress – Characters

I just made progress on Magic Arrives! So far I’m 54% complete on the Characters phase. I’ve got about fourteen characters so far. I’ll have about twenty-five to thirty when I’m done.

Magic Arrives

Phase:Characters

54%

Magic Arrives Progress – Scene List

I just made progress on Magic Arrives! So far I’m 6% complete on the Scene List phase. That’s 6 out of 100 scenes.

Magic Arrives

Phase:Scene List

Progress – First Draft Words

I just made progress on Magic Arrives! So far I’m 4.9% complete on the First Draft phase. That’s roughly 4,900 words out of my goal of 100,000.
Shortcode

Magic Arrives

Phase:First Draft

4.9%

What remains to be done

After I finish the first draft, I’ll still have to self-edit. Then I send it to my editor, Dori Harrell. She’ll do both line editing and final proofing. I’ll also have to create a front cover, back cover and spine with my illustrator, Sean “Fuzzy” Flanagan. Fuzzy will also do my chapter icons for me.

Then there’s the small matter of uploading it to Amazon and publishing it there. Finally, I order paperback copies so you can get your copy here, directly from me, as less than Amazon.

The Feedback Loop Review

Since I’m writing a fantasy book, let me give you a review of one I’ve read this year. All my reviews are here on Goodreads. Clickity-click!

My Review

January 11, 2023

Harmon Cooper writes an interesting RPG fantasy with the premise the main character is trapped in an endless loop in an RPG game. Sort of like Groundhog Day, only people are killing you every day.

The main character is unbelievably violent, killing first and asking questions later. This is due to years of being trapped. As he kills his opponents, he keeps adding their weapons to his inventory list, even items that don’t see like weapons.

I didn’t like the main character, probably because he’d gone crazy and was no longer rational. But persist in the series–he gets better.
Andy Zach
Author 10 books 85 followers

Get Your Free Books By Clicking Here!

Posted on March 16, 2023March 16, 2023 by admin

Best March 2023 Reviews and Discounted Books

Best March 2023 Reviews – I’m writing my first fantasy book this year, so I went back to one of my big influences, Terry Prachett in my first review.

If you’re just looking for discounted books, go here. You’ll get my audiobooks for free and other books discounted with every newsletter.

Best March 2023 Reviews > Sourcery

Once again, Terry Pratchett dazzles with a brilliant combination of humor, fantasy, and amazing description. I very literally laughed out loud four or five times while reading this book for the second time.

The inept wizard Rincewind is the primary star in the book, but there are many colorful characters, such as Conina, the daughter of Cohen the Barbarian, with heroism in her blood. Death makes an appearance, along with the other Horsemen of the Apocalypse, who are occupied in surprising activities.

Finally, there is the antagonist/protagonist Coin who is the eighth son of an eighth son of an eighth son and that makes him a sourcerer–a source of magic and the source of the name of the book. He’s young, inexperienced, and more powerful than all the wizards combined.

No more description is needed. You will enjoy this book if you have a sense of humor
Andy Zach

Best March 2023 Reviews – A Cowboy Necromancer Book

March 3, 2023

A Challenging Continuation of the Series

Harmon Cooper does not disappoint! The Cowboy Necromancer Sterling Montero and his daughter The Sunflower Kid head west to see the ocean. The fact 90% of humanity has died due to an alien invasion and subsequent apocalypse doesn’t deter them. But they quickly meet challenges they never expected.

The novella ended with me wanting more. Some problems were resolved, but more remained.
Andy Zach
Author

Hilarious

Zombie Turkeys audiobook, click to get
Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

I’ve never laughed so much listening to a zombie story before…but then again I’ve never listened to a book about zombie turkeys before either. Hilariously written and actually has some great characters too. Many cameos as well. Definitely an awesome time listening to this one. Hoping for a sequel!

kixfan

Best March 2023 Reviews – A Half Demon Rebuilding Heaven

March 4, 2023

Author Harmon Cooper continues his action-packed series featuring Danzen a half-demon, half-human assassin. He got tired of the assassin business and retired and was immediately attacked by assassins. He dropped out of sight and was found by his fully demon brother, who was out to kill him as a potential rival to rule hell. His father, the ruler of hell, wants him to be his successor. His mother wants him to rebuild heaven, which fell to earth hundreds of years before.

That covers the first six books, aside from brutal battles with demons and monsters in every chapter. Danzen continues to gather the powerful remnants of heaven methodically. He has loyal friends and one who is more than a friend.

He has a choice–should he join up with hell-spawn to rebuild heaven? If not, his whole mission will fail and he will die.
Andy Zach

Do you have suggestions of books for me to read and review? Tell me all about them! If I read and review one you suggested, I’ll mention your name and give you a free book of your choice!

An action-packed adventure!

Click to get!

Overall    5 out of 5 stars

Performance    5 out of 5 stars

Story    5 out of 5 stars

This series is the first I have read of Andy Zach’s and I am not disappointed! This story has tons of action, well written characters, and the zombies are not mindless slow shells. A refreshing take on zombies as a whole. The plot moves at a good pace and the story arc continues to work well over the series. I look forward to book 3! Audio Version: Phil Blechman and Raven Perez do a great job with their respective characters and the overall narration.
Nemesis

Free Books for you!

Here are your free audiobooks! Claim yours by clicking here! Which ones? Most of them!

First, I’ll cover my zombie turkey apocalypse parody, The Life After Life Chronicles.

Zombie Turkeys

Zombie Detective

Then we have:

Next is Paranormal Privateers Click to listen

After that, you’ve got Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse

Best Science Stories or Science Fiction More Good Things Best Book Reviews — Click to listen to free sample of Secret Supers.

Moving on to my teen superhero series, we have two audiobooks.

Secret Supers is available in Audible for free if you subscribe to Audible or if you’re from the United Kingdom.

2021 Reviews — Villain’s Vacation Audio book. Click to listen.

The next book in the series is Villain’s Vacation, the second of my three Secret Supers books.

Best March 2023 Reviews
Produce Your Audiobook

Finally, my third book, Secret Supers in Space, in coming out in audiobook this month. Watch this blog!

Click here to get an ebook or paperback from Amazon.

For all free audiobooks, click here to get them from me.

Posted on February 24, 2023February 24, 2023 by admin

You Can Get My New Audiobook For Free

You Can Get My New Audiobook For Free. “But how, Andy?” you ask.

Let’s cut to the chase: Click here to get it.

But maybe you want to know about my new audiobook, Secret Supers in Space.

Here’s the blurb:

The Secret Supers are bored out of their minds during summer vacation-until they go to Space Camp. They learn all about the space program, try out moon gravity and zero-g simulations, and practice docking with the International Space Station.

But that’s the easy part. The villains they defeated in the past are back with a diabolical plot that renders the middle schoolers’ superpowers ineffective. Jeremy, Aubrey, Dan, and Kayla face the biggest challenge of their lives. Even if they escape the villains’ clutches, will they survive?
Find out in Secret Supers in Space!

Get My New Audiobook – Click Here

Here’s Secret Super Kayla Verdera at the controls of the spaceship in Secret Supers in Space.

But what do my readers think of Secret Supers in Space? Here’s a review for you:

Top review from the United States

5.0 out of 5 stars Cute

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on December 9, 2022

I love this story, a great continuation of the first book. The Super Secrets have one heck of an adventure, and I was happy to be along for the ride.

darlene loop

Meet My New Audiobook Actor and Producer

Khai Lannor. His bio on Audible:

Khai Lannor
Narrator
Full-time; versatile male audiobook narrator with a standard American accent. I’ve produced 600+ titles in many genres. Royalty share or PFH works for me; depending on the project. I can give you an exact price after seeing the manuscript or auditioning. Thanks for your interest, feel free to send me a message with any questions!
Gender: Male
Location: Hawaii, United States
Website: freebooksforpeople.neocities.org
Available for: Royalty Share,Royalty Share Plus or Unspecified

Meet the Secret Supers

Jeremy Gentle, 7th-grader, in an electric wheelchair due to cerebral palsy. His father, Bradon Gentle, works as a financial planner and his mother, Denise, works as an occupational therapist.

He loves science, math, science fiction to the point he tends to be bit obsessive about his interests. His parents have adapted their home for him, putting in an elevator and giving him a science lab where he can work on his experiments downstairs.

In the book Secret Supers, he accidently gives himself a superpower.

Meet Dan Elanga, the next Secret Super

My New Audiobook
Your Sixth Literary Gift Love These Superheroes — Dan Elanga – He can read minds and sensory impressions.

Dan Elanga, is the son of Cameroon immigrants, Elisha and Beulah Elanga. He was born blind and his father, a successful merchant in Cameroon, migrated to the US to help their son fully develop his abilities despite his blindness.

Dan became Jeremy’s best friend, perhaps because they were opposites. Dan was big and gregarious. Jeremy was small and private. Dan likes to joke. Jeremy is serious.

Dan was the second person to get a superpower.

Secret Super Three: Kayla Verdera

My New Audiobook
Your Sixth Literary Gift Kayla Verdera - Love These Superheroes — Kayla Verdera

Former cheerleader and singer, she lost both abilities through spinal menengitis. She has partial paralysis of her vocal cords and trouble talking and walking through lack of muscle control

Kayla notices Jeremy and Dan talking and wants in on their secret. She too gets a superpower, but she still needs her walker. Very small, she’s 4 6 and 75 pounds.

Aubrey Wilcowsky: Secret Super Four

Aubrey Wilcosky — Aubrey, super powered heroine.

Aubrey’s 13, loves softball, and lost two legs in an auto accident. She got 3D-printed prosthetic legs, along with her super power.

Unlike Kayla, she’s loud and boisterous, since she has four noisy older brothers. Still, they’ve been best friends for years. Kayla coaches Aubrey on classes and Aubrey has stuck loyally by Kayla even though she lost her voice and walking ability.

Secret Supers in Space Audiobook

Here is where you come in: would you want to buy the Secret Supers in Space audiobook? Reply to this post, or contact me, Andy Zach, right here. (Click here)

The audiobook will be for sale on Amazon, Audible, ACX, and Apple Books.

You can get all eight of my audiobooks for free by clicking here. I offer free audiobook codes to all my newsletter subscribers, as long as the codes last.

Posted on February 16, 2023February 16, 2023 by admin

Best 2023 Reviews So Far and Discounted Books

Best 2023 Reviews So Far. I’ve been reading and writing in 2023. Read my reviews of books I’ve read and others reviews of books I’ve written. Then go and claim your free and discounted books from me.

I finished my most recent review the other day on Goodreads:

Best 2023 Andy Zach’s Reviews > The Color of Magic

Best 2023 Reviews
The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett

The Color of Magic (Discworld, #1; Rincewind, #1)
by Terry Pratchett

it was amazing 5 of 5 stars

bookshelves: fantasy, humor

I re-read this book for the fourth time, the second time since I became an author, and I love it even more!

This is the first book in Terry Pratchett’s Disk World series, so he sets up his magical system (magic is a color of light), his fantasy world (a flat world on the back of four elephants, standing on the back of a space turtle) and his characters (Rincewind, a magician with only one spell he can’t use. Cowardly and good at running away) (Twoflower, a classic tourist, with limitless chest of gold, no fear, and endless curiosity), (The Luggage, a suitcase with legs, mage of sapient pearwood, invulnerable and clever). And those three are merely the protagonists.

I won’t spoil any of the insane plot, but suffice it to say, Pratchett satirizes nearly every fantasy trope and many conventions of our current culture.

This fourth time around, I was writing my own fantasy novel/series and I looked at how Prattchett started out his series. It was a ripping good start, with unending action and interesting characters from the beginning. Who doesn’t like Death as an animated skeleton and a lugubrious voice?
Andy Zach‘s review

Best 2023 Reviews – Look What Someone Thinks Of …

This review appeared on Amazon this month.

Oops!: Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse (The Life After Life Chronicles)

(Click to get your autographed copy at a discount)

(Or you can click here to get Amazon copy)

(Finally, click here if you want a free ebook to review. Or email me at [email protected])

Can I have some more sir? This book is so good!

February 10, 2023

A Phoenix that cannot be tranquilized pickles injected with turkey DNA, a hamster that can read… This is just three of the great stories you get in this book.

It makes me wonder what does Andy Zak thinks while sitting around at his house he must have a vivid, vivid imagination! I’m just glad he shares his madness with the world.

I do want to say I didn’t read the last three stories because it said they were spoilers for his superhero books that I plan on reading next but I absolutely love the author six or seven stories in this anthology and highly recommend them.

Once again the narration was great the stories were entertaining and they had lots of LOL moments! I thoroughly enjoyed this authors books and cannot get enough. Please forgive any mistakes as I am blind and dictate my review.
Janalyn

Free Books for you!

Here are your free audiobooks! Claim yours by clicking here! Which ones? Most of them!

First, I’ll cover my zombie turkey apocalypse parody, The Life After Life Chronicles.

Zombie Turkeys

Zombie Detective

Then we have:

Next is Paranormal Privateers Click to listen

After that, you’ve got Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse

Best Science Stories or Science Fiction More Good Things Best Book Reviews
2023 Best Reviews — Click to listen to free sample of Secret Supers.

Moving on to my teen superhero series, we have two audiobooks.

Secret Supers is available in Audible for free if you subscribe or if you’re from the United Kingdom.

The next book in the series is Villain’s Vacation, the second of my three Secret Supers books.

Finally, my third book, Secret Supers in Space, in coming out in audiobook this month. Watch this blog!

Click here to get an ebook or paperback from Amazon.

For all free audiobooks, click here to get them from me.

Posted on February 2, 2023February 2, 2023 by admin

Produce Your Audiobook in 4 Steps

Produce Your Audiobook 4 in Steps – what are they?

I covered this six years ago (!!!) in this blog post: 4 Steps in Producing Zombie Turkeys Audiobook. Since then, I’ve created eight audiobooks using six different voice actors.

You can see them all, except my eighth book, which is in production, right here on my Audible author page.

Find out all that I’ve learned in six years and make your own audiobook starting today!

Produce Your Audiobook – Step 1

Step 1 is join ACX as an author. Create your ACX audiobook account and connect it to your published book.

An example of your Audible sign up page.

Produce Your Audiobook – Step 2

Secret Supers in Space
Produce Your Audiobook

I then published the audition script for the book, selecting the best sections to show the reader’s capabilities. You want the reader to voice your major characters. Be sure to provide voice directions about the age and personality of the characters and any accents you desire. Then I put the book out to for audition on ACX.

My most recent audiobook, now in production, is Secret Supers in Space.

Here’s the page where you upload your script for audition.

Step Three: Sending the Script

After selecting a voice actor, Khai Lannor, I submitted a contract for the audiobook, and he agreed. ACX has pre-made contracts to offer to voice actors and producers.

Here’s Khai’s profile on ACX

Khai Lannor
Narrator
Full-time; versatile male audiobook narrator with a standard American accent. I’ve produced 600+ titles in many genres. Royalty share or PFH works for me; depending on the project. I can give you an exact price after seeing the manuscript or auditioning. Thanks for your interest, feel free to send me a message with any questions!
Gender: Male
Location: Hawaii, United States
Website: freebooksforpeople.neocities.org
Available for: Royalty Share,Royalty Share Plus or Unspecified

Royalty share, Royalty Share Plus are alternative contracts you can offer.

Royalty Share means you split the audiobook royalties 50-50.

Finally, Royalty Share Plus means you split the audiobook royalties and pay the voice actor/producer a fee.

Produce Your Audiobook: Step Four

Approving the Audiobook

Khai sent me a fifteen-minute sample. After I approved that, he finished the book. That leads us to the final step of the process.

Along the way, I also send him directions on how I want the characters voiced: their accent, tone, and age.

I have nine main characters in Secret Supers in Space, all with different voices

Here’s one, Jeremy Gentle. He’s 12 going on 13, with cerebral palsy. He’s in an electric wheelchair most of the time–except when he’s using his telekinesis power.

Aubrey Wilcosky
Produce Your Audiobook — Aubrey, super powered heroine.

And here’s another, Aubrey Wilcowski. She’s 13, loves softball, and lost two legs in an auto accident. She got 3D-printed prosthetic legs, along with super strength through the Secret Supers.

The Final Step: Selling the Secret Supers in Space Audiobook

Here is where you come in: would you want to buy the Secret Supers in Space audiobook? Reply to this post, or contact me, Andy Zach, right here. (Click here)

The audiobook will be for sale on Amazon, Audible, ACX, and Apple Books.

You can get my audiobooks for free by clicking here. I offer free audiobook codes to all my newsletter subscribers, as long as the codes last.

Let’s close this post with the latest review of Secret Supers in Space

darlene loop

Cute

Reviewed in the United States on December 9, 2022

I love this story, a great continuation of the first book. The Super Secrets have one heck of an adventure, and I was happy to be along for the ride.

Posted on January 25, 2023January 25, 2023 by admin

Three Ways You Can Get 8 Books for Free!

Three Ways You Can Get 8 Books for Free! I’d be happy if I could get one book for free in one way. But I’ve got three for eight for you.

So how do you feel about that? Here’s how I hope you feel:

Do you know who Pharrell Williams is?

If you like Pharrell William’s ‘Happy’ (or not!), let me know and I’ll give you a free book.

Three Ways You Can Get Free Books – Way One

Your first method is simple: just click here.

The link connects you to my newsletter. The newsletter gives away free books twice a month year-round. I give away my audiobooks (as long as supplies last) and ebooks.

Which books? I have seven books in two series. Here’s the first book of the first series:

Three Ways You
Zombie Turkeys Laughter 2021 Reviews — Zombie Turkeys audiobook cover. Click to listen!

What’s it about?

Sam Melvin, an underachieving e-reporter from a small town, changes forever when he meets turkeys that won’t stay dead. You can shoot ’em, chop ’em, burn ’em — they come back stronger.

As Sam tracks down the zombie turkeys and how to eradicate them, his editor, Lisa Kambacher, nags him to turn his stories and expenses in on time.

Lisa uses her intelligence to pursue the lucrative carnivorous turkey story.

Throughout the turkey apocalypse, they dare ravaged cities, plow knee-deep in gore and corpses, and upload streams of zombie turkey video news to the world.

If you have a heart condition or lack humor, you should not listen to Zombie Turkeys, no matter how much you want to find out what happens.

What do readers say?

5.0 out of 5 stars

This book is Hilarious

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on January 15, 2023

I had a great time reading Zombie Turkeys. Andy Zach creates a hysterical, fun world where turkeys are at the top of the food chain, right before Thanksgiving. Time for a little Turkey payback and the new sound of terror is gobble.. gobble.
Barbara

Three Ways You Can Get Free Books – The Second Way

It’s so simple: all the audiobooks are yours free to read–if you join the Audible program. You can join by clicking on the first book in my second series below.

Or just click here.

Three Ways You
Best Science Stories or Science Fiction More Good Things Best Book Reviews — Click to listen to free sample of Secret Supers.

What’s it about?

Jeremy Gentle fell flat on his face at therapy. That was normal since he had cerebral palsy. But his new superpower wasn’t normal. Then, things got weirder when his best friend Dan Elanga got a different superpower. But Dan was still blind.

Kayla Verdera and Aubrey Wilcosky, two girls in their middle-school special ed class, discovered they too had new superpowers. Kayla was mute and needed a walker. Aubrey lost two legs and used crutches. But they were as powerful as the boys. What should the four friends do?

Jeremy knew if the word got out, it’d be a media circus. Then, they started fighting crime as the Secret Supers. Who knew a disability could be a perfect disguise? No one would ever think of disabled kids as superheroes. But they ran into problems they never expected.

What Do Readers Say?

Overall    5 out of 5 stars

Performance    5 out of 5 stars

Story    5 out of 5 stars

03-23-22

Another winner by Andy Zach!

Unique and wonderful book for young people. Kids see a whole new side of kids with special needs. Not weird. Just kids who are facing a different sort of challenge than they are. The story is fun and believable. It kept me interested, and I’m an old lady!
june

The Third Way You Get Free Books

Again, it’s simple as can be: Join Kindle Unlimited and you can read all the ebooks on Amazon for free. Just click here and join Kindle Unlimited.

Here’s a link to my latest ebook in my Life After Life Chronicles series, Zombie Detective. You can join KU there.

What’s it about?

Ace zombie reporter Sam Melvin has been fired–by his wife, Lisa. Their paper, The Midley Beacon, is barely surviving. How will they make ends meet?

Sam decides to give being a detective a try. He advertises his business–but his zombie experience comes with it. All across the country, people bring their zombie problems to Sam. Squirrels? Bulls? Sam’s on the case. But can his experience with zombie turkeys transfer?

Sam finds out in a series of deadly adventures–and so will you when you read this book. See if you can keep from dying from laughter.

What Do Readers Say?

5.0 out of 5 stars

A hilarious adventure

Reviewed in the United States on July 27, 2022

When Lisa fires Sam, he doesn’t know what he’s going to do, for about two seconds till she tells him he has until that night to find a new career. Because he works better under the deadline and she should know because she’s his wife.

This book was one of the funniest books I have ever read. I love Simon Carr’s books and because I have brought all of his books I wanted to find a new author who was just as funny and I found him. I had no idea zombie animals with that prevalent but they are in this guy investigates the situation and when he’s hired by the government crazy things ensue.

I’d love this book and highly recommend it if you love to laugh and trust me they have giggles on every page. You can really truly tell when comedy comes natural and when they are trying too hard in this author his comedic talent in spades I cannot say enough how funny this book is and can’t wait to read the second one in the theories or at least I hope they have a second one.

I was given this book by the author in story origin but I am leaving this review voluntarily please forgive any mistakes as I am blind and dictate my review but all opinions are definitely my own.
Janalyn

If you liked ‘Happy’ maybe you’ll like ‘Tacky’ by Weird Al

Don’t Leave Without Your Free Books

Claim your free books from me by clicking right here. I give ebooks and audiobooks to all my newsletter subscribers. Plus, I link to other authors’ discount and free books. And a lot more.

Posted on January 12, 2023January 12, 2023 by admin

Epic Fantasy Fun! I Just Began Writing One

Epic Fantasy Fun! I Just Began Writing One yesterday. Boy, did that feel good, to finally get started. I wrote my first scene, 700+ words.

So what’s it all about?

Do you know who Dionne Warwick is?

If you know Dionne Warwick, let me know and I’ll give you a free book.

Epic Fantasy Fun – The Premise

I have working title for my next book. It may or not stick. If you got a better one and I use it, I’ll give you any book of mine, any format. Send your suggestions here or to [email protected].

My working title is: Magic Arrives. My premise is simple: our Earth, in 2023, becomes magical. I’ve worked out most of the rules for my magic system, but I won’t tell anyone, not even the readers of my book. I want the reader to discover how the magic works as the characters do.

Epic Fantasy Fun
Andy Zach Fans — Earthrise on the moon. Click the pic to get autographed books directly from me.

What kind of cover am I thinking of? Something like this:

I’ll have my artist add magical hints to make it more fantasy, so people know this book is in the fantasy genre.

Where do you think I get my fantasy ideas from? Take a look at my reviews below.

Epic Fantasy Fun – My Reviews

[ 5 of 5 stars ]
Shelves	fantasy,
Format	Paperback
Status	January 11, 2023 – Finished Reading
Review	Patricia McKillip practices her craft of writing fantasy at the highest level in this atmospheric depiction of a city, Ombria, rocked by the death of its regent, Royce. The mysterious and manipulative Black Dominia immediately orders his mistress, Lydea, out on the streets, presumably to die. Lydea, a beautiful former tavern wench, makes her way across the dangerous city at night to her father’s tavern. A mysterious girl, Mag, helps her. Mag, was raised by a sorceress, Faey, who stays in the shadows of Ombria, content to sell her spells to the highest bidders–including the Black Dominia. Ms. McKillip introduces more colorful characters, without explaining the magic they contain at all. The complex political and magical mystery continues until the end when the mystery pops like a bubble. This is a must read for any fan of fantasy with vivid characters. (less)

Check out this Fantasy Review

Bronze Rank Brewer (Hawkin’s Magic Beers #1)
Rating	[ 4 of 5 stars ]
Shelves	fantasy, read, rpg
Format	Kindle Edition
Status	January 6, 2023 – Shelved as: rpg4
Review	First time I’ve read a book by James Ghoul, and I’m looking forward to the second! Bronze Rank Brewer is a very unconventional RPG-type novel, where the main character, Hawkin, decides to embark on a brewing quest. He doesn’t want to travel; he loves his woody wilderness. He is very sociable and friendly. He befriends both a hideous, deadly monster who becomes a friend and helper and also earns the loyalty of a rejected goblin. And a goddess. The goddess is of astral planes, not of brewing. Somehow, she thinks Hawkin will become the greatest brewer ever, and the brewing god is upset. So he sends his most trustworthy brewer to find Hawkin and find out his secret. You will enjoy this one.

Don’t Leave Without Your Free Books

Claim your free books from me by clicking right here. I give ebooks and audiobooks to all my newsletter subscribers. Plus, I link to other authors’ discount and free books. And a lot more.

Posted on December 29, 2022December 29, 2022 by admin

Best September 2022 to December 2022 Content

Best September 2022 to December 2022. Hoo boy is this one packed! And it’s all good.

My opinions, of course.

Best September 2022

Lets start with a creepy, real-life picture:

Don’t want creepy science? How about recent astronomy from the James Webb Telescope?

How about a flying bike?

Let’s finish September with some geoscience:

For more, click here: Best of September’s Internet for You

Best September 2022 to October – Now for a classic Dystopia

I couldn’t find my review of 1984, but I found a review I agree with.

I read Nineteen Eighty-Four when I was eleven years old. School had just let out for the summer, and my family spent that first Saturday down on Lake Moovalya on the Colorado River. It was my first time out in the sun, and I seriously overdid it, spending all day in the river and getting severely sunburned. The next day I could barely move. My mom told me I was “sun poisoned.” The weather turned ugly, too–we were hit with a howling dust storm, so strong and thick I couldn’t see across the street. I wasn’t going anywhere, so I looked for something to read. Our next-door neighbors’ son had gone off to college and his parents, knowing I was a bookworm, gave me a box of paperbacks, mostly science fiction. And in that collection was a copy of Nineteen Eighty-Four. I don’t know why I picked that particular volume–I could have selected Isaac Asimov’s I, Robot or Andre Norton’s The Sioux Spaceman–but Orwell was what I went with.

Wow. When I finished the book a few hours later, I had never been so bummed in my life. I think maybe being so sick and miserable must have had something to do with it, but the experience of reading about Winston Smith’s futile, hopeless fight against Big Brother was so overwhelming, for years afterwards–until I read Robert Cormier’s I Am the Cheese—Nineteen Eighty-Four was my nominee for most depressing book ever written.

But even though I was thoroughly depressed after reading Nineteen Eighty-Four, I still rate it five stars. The total despair the book engendered in me is a testament to Orwell’s skill as a writer. As with all of Orwell’s work, fiction and non-fiction alike, Nineteen Eighty-Four is well-written–Orwell certainly knew his craft. It also captures perfectly life in the Stalinist Soviet Union. The utter bleakness of life, the omnipotent repression by the government, the controlling of the very language to restrict the ability of the populace to think, and the futility of rebellion, all were features of life in the USSR, and all are portrayed truly and vividly in Nineteen Eighty-Four.Hank Hoeft

Now here are my comments.

Think of them as my review, if you want my perspective.

Andy Zach

3 years ago

It’s so depressing (I read it at about 17) that I rate it 2 stars, despite being still read seventy years after it was published. Normally I would give it 5 stars for that feat.

Andy Zach

3 years ago

The real horror of the book is that Orwell was describing conditions in Soviet Russia at the time and that nothing has changed in human behavior since then. The same conditions exist in North Korea.

Hank Hoeft

3 years ago

I understand where you’re coming from. And in reading your comment, I realize I need to amend, or add to, my review–I should have included why I rated it five stars.

Andy Zach

3 years ago

Hank, I can make a strong argument to rate it five stars. 1) It’s a historically accurate portrayal of Soviet Russia and current North Korea and Cuba; 2) It provides an ominous warning against socialism and communism; 3) It’s still relevant 70 years after it was published; 4) It is extremely well written with gripping characters.

But ultimately my rating is subjective. I read it twice and hated both experiences.

October 2022 – After My First Book, I Got Exponential Growth – How?

I celebrated my sixth year as a published author in October and looked closely at my experience. Huh. I’ve had exponential growth. So why do I ever complain?

So, why were my sales growing? I thought of these reasons:

The more books I write, the more books I sell. Seems obvious, right? But now I saw how books would sell each other.
The more formats I have, the more I sell. I publish each book in print, ebook, and audiobook. The audiobook promotions with Audible allowed me to give away free books and get paid for them.
The more events I attended, the more I sold. Again, it’s obvious.

From these conclusions, I decided to promote my audiobooks even more, attend even more events, and write even faster.

What happened next? Sorry to spoil the surprise, but 2020 turned out to be even better. I’ll put that in my next blog post. Get all my posts through my newsletter. Click here.

Best of November to December 2022

Cover Reveal for My New Book! The second book I wrote and published in a year! This one also made a trilogy of my Secret Supers series:

Best September 2022
Interesting Links — Secret Supers – click for free audiobook.

Best September 2022
Villain's Vacation cover What is it like? — Villain’s Vacation click to get yours

First, disabled seventh graders get superpowers.

Then they fight crime. Then go on vacation to a coaster park–where their worst enemy awaits, seeking revenge.

What happens next?

Best September 2022
Secret Supers in Space

Find out in Secret Supers in Space! Click to get your copy!

Best of September 2022 to December – What Can Top Two New Books?

Free gifts! I gave away twenty-five free literary gifts from December 1 to December 25! Enjoy them below. Don’t forget to get more free stuff from me by clicking here.

Posted on December 28, 2022December 28, 2022 by admin

Best May 2022 to August 2022 Content

Best May 2022 to August. A lot happened last year! Enjoy the best of the year from me.

My idiosyncratic opinions, of course.

Best May 2022 – A fun story!

Best May 2022
Your Sixth Literary Gift What is it like — Secret Supers – click to get yours!

Reviewed in the United States on May 16, 2022

Jeremy has cerebral palsy and uses a wheelchair to get around. He is in a special education class with Dan, who is blind, Kayla, who was mute and used a walker, and Audrey, who lost her legs and uses crutches. One afternoon, when conducting experiments in his laboratory, Jeremy accidentally gives himself superpowers. Specifically, he gains the ability of telekinesis, which he can use to help himself walk, cause his wheelchair to travel at much higher speeds, and even fly. Not wanting to keep this discovery to himself, Jeremy tells his 3 friends about it and gives each of them superpowers as well.

But now that they have superpowers, what should they do? Following the words of Uncle Ben of Spiderman, they decide they must use their powers for good, beginning by trying to solve a case of a stolen car, and keep their identities a secret, modeling their costumes on the Incredibles.

This book was a fun story that placed individuals with disabilities front and center in the story. While the superpowers allow them to do things they wouldn’t have been able to do otherwise, it is what they choose to do with their powers that makes all the difference. Also, even with their superpowers, their initial disabilities aren’t erased, which I think is important.

I liked to development of the characters and how they interacted and supported each other; I only wish the book had been longer so I could have spent more time with them. I am glad that there’s a sequel already published, and I look forward to reading/listening to it.
Jennifer C.

Your Best May 2022 – a New Book

Here’s the new book, my first non-fiction book:

Best May 2022
Gospel Medley Writer's Block: My Experience — The Gospel Medley cover. Click to get

Are you curious about Jesus Christ? Do you struggle to understand the Bible? The Gospel Medley includes the four Gospels in a single narrative, faithfully pulling the text from the World English Bible. You are now able to read all the gospel as a single, easy-to-read story.

Each Gospel describes Jesus’s life from a different point of view with different details and insights. The Gospel Medley combines every word into a single perspective with all details and events arranged chronologically.

Unlike other harmonies, The Gospel Medley doesn’t put the four gospels in columns or rows. Instead, the text is integrated word by word into a smoothly flowing narrative. Further, each paragraph references the four gospels so you can read the original citations. You also get footnotes of all the quotes from the Old Testament, giving you the context of Jesus’s words.

For a unique perspective of the four gospels, read ‘The Gospel Medley’ today.

Best May Blog Posts

Your Latest Science Fiction–and Science

One sample from the blog:

Writer’s Block My Experience – This is why I don’t write more

What’s New Science and Reviews in 2022?

Best of June 2022

What my next book is all about

I wrote and published two books in 2022: Here’s my second. Secret Supers in Space covers the Secret Supers trip to Space Camp – and beyond.

Here’s what Space Camp is like:

Space Camp

More details are here: Summertime and the writing is easy – NOT!

But watching videos is easy. Here are two from June:

A hypersonic space plane – does it exist?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eXxb5SwGgtM&t=2s&ab_channel=iGadgetPro

The first helicopter on Mars

Your Best of July 2022.

Now don’t you feel better knowing what happens if you get sucked into a black hole? You can get more details here: Science Is Science Fiction Story Fuel

Here’s a science fiction book review:

Best May 2022
SciFi Story Fuel My Undead Mother-in-law — My Undead Mother-in-law cover. Click to get yours.

Reviewed in the United States on July 1, 2022

This series is the first I have read of Andy Zach’s and I am not disappointed! This story has tons of action, well written characters, and the zombies are not mindless slow shells. A refreshing take on zombies as a whole. The plot moves at a good pace and the story arc continues to work well over the series.

I look forward to book 3! Audio Version: Phil Blechman and Raven Perez do a great job with their respective characters and the overall narration.
Nemesis

Finally You Arrive at August 2022

Review of	Save the Dragons (Kindle Edition)
Rating	4 of 5 stars
Shelves	fantasy, humor, read
Format	Kindle Edition edit
Status	August 27, 2022 – Finished Reading
Review	As usual, Dave Freer’s book is a romp in madness. We start off with an improbable hero, Squigs, six foot ten, and ectomorphic. He’s a university student in alchemy who’s on the run from people who want him dead and who just blew off his hand. So naturally, he jumps into another universe, through a portal predicted by his laptop computer. The new world is swamp and ocean where he’s saved from death by a huge man and his beautiful daughter, who hates him. She’s destined to marry a hero from a royal family, so she has no time for a clumsy, awkward suitor. They include him on a mission to save the rapidly poached dragons of their world. Secret societies, demons, and body-selling vampires enter the story, as well as a blood-thirsty dwarf and a spectral parrot. Hang on for the ride and enjoy the story.

More details here: August M emes and Reviews for You

Posted on December 27, 2022December 27, 2022 by admin

Best January 2022 to April 2022

Best January 2022 to April. I’ll finish the year curating my own work. Here’s the best of the best.

Did I mention this curation is subjective?

another fun book!

Best January 2022 SciFi Story Fuel My Undead Mother-in-law — My Undead Mother-in-law cover. Click to get yours.

5.0 out of 5 stars

Reviewed in the United States on January 6, 2022

Verified Purchase

I like these books as the zombies are relatable and enduring. I nice twist to the gory zombie genre that is out there!

Kimdkus

But that’s not all for January! I’ve got this great post:

What’s New Science and Reviews in 2022?

If you want a taste of what wackiness awaits you, here’s a video:

It’s funnier than you think

This video and channel became a favorite of mine before Russia became a nation non grata due to the Ukrainian war. It’s still funny and shows that there are real people in that country.

Short stories to keep you looking for zombies!

From March 30, 2022. Click here to read.

Best January 2022
latest science news What's New Science — Oops cover final medium

Reviewed in the United States on January 10, 2022

I started by reading this author’s book about the Turkey Apocalypse. I had so much fun (yes, fun, even though the turkeys were out killing everyone and thing in their path!) Then I read about the Undead Mother in law. Even better! Each book gets more accomplished than the next.

This one was a surprise! I thought I had purchased the same book twice (I’ve been known to do that!) However, this is just a group of short stories that are prequels or sequels to the others that fill in some questions I didn’t know I had or start me on a new train of thought. Fun to read! Just make sure you check all wildlife around you for metal caps before you settle in! They’re watching you!

june

Best January 2022 – What about February?

Nothing ever happens in February–except my birthday. And Lincoln’s. And Washington’s. Not that there’s any connection.

But there was also this blog post:

2022 Best Science Stories So Far – and Reviews

Here’s a video excerpt of one of the science stories:

Just like R2-D2, only real.

March 4th – The only day that is a command

Look what happened in March!

Never disabled

Best January 2022
Interesting Links — Secret Supers – click for free audiobook.

5.0 out of 5 stars

Reviewed in the United States on March 24, 2022

An uplifting tale of how four students find that within disability is ability. Looking past who others think they are was the way the four came together to make a difference not only in their own lives but the lives of those around them. The main theme of this tale is practice, practice, practice.
Eric Rose

Best January 2022 to March

The marine biologist whose photography pastime became a profession

Best January 2022 to April – Andy Zach‘s review

Apr 21, 2022

really liked it

bookshelves: humor, science-fiction

The first thing you notice about Dave Freer’s novel Cloud-Castles is the setting: a gas giant with a habitable zone in the atmosphere. Alien technology genetically engineering plant life that floats in the atmosphere and a whole ecosystem of flying creatures. There is an anti-gravity city, which has degenerated into a slum, and floating castles, owned by two warring alien species who use humans as slaves.

That setting is enough to make me read the book. But I also love the premise: a rich, but innocent scion, Augustus Thistlewood III, of humanity’s wealthiest family, is there to practice philanthropy toward the poor, downtrodden masses, using his recently acquired sociology degree.

Needless to say, his suitcase is quickly stolen by a ‘helpful’ street urchin Briz. Looking through his stuff, she realizes he has nothing to pawn and is a complete innocent, but very wealthy. Briz returns the suitcase and offers to escort him around the dangerous port town.

Then, adventures happen.

Highly recommended.
Andy Zach

You can see it in this blog from April 2022. Click here.

If you don’t want to miss a blog post, click here. I’ll give you free books too!

What is it like to write a novel? I tell you all about it here.

Best April 2022

Here is an R-Rated science video. Not for kids, nor for adults who don’t think like kids.

I found another Youtube channel I like in April 2022. Enjoy this LOW bass Geoff Castellucci:

Posted on December 25, 2022December 25, 2022 by admin — 1 Comment

Your Twenty-Fourth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts

Gospel Medley Writer's Block: My Experience

Your Twenty-Fourth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts to Christmas. Merry Christmas, you’ll enjoy this Christmasy excerpt from my non-fiction book, The Gospel Medley.

What happened between the visit of the shepherds to the manger and the visit of the wise men to the house? In this two-part series, you’ll find out! Both parts are coming out today, as my final two gifts to you!

That’s not all–my other twenty-three gifts are below for your reading pleasure, not just my twenty-fourth literary gift! You don’t have to unwrap them–just click on them.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here.

Your Twenty-Fourth Literary Gift: From The Gospel Medley

(Where the shepherds left us.)

20 The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, just as it was told them.

21 When eight days were fulfilled for the circumcision of the child, His name was called Jesus, which was given by the angel before He was conceived in the womb.

22 When the days of their purification according to the law of Moses were fulfilled, they brought Him up to Jerusalem, to present Him to the Lord

23 (as it is written in the law of the Lord, “Every male who opens the womb shall be holy to the Lord”),^[1] 24 and to offer a sacrifice according to that which is said in the law of the Lord, “A pair of turtledoves, or two young pigeons.”^[2]

25 Behold, there was a man in Jerusalem whose name was Simeon. This man was righteous and devout, looking for the consolation of Israel, and the Holy Spirit was on him. 26 It had been revealed to him by the Holy Spirit that he should not see death before he had seen the Lord’s Christ. 27 He came in the Spirit into the temple. When the parents brought in the child, Jesus, that they might do concerning Him according to the custom of the law, 28 then he received Him into his arms, and blessed God, and said,

Simeon’s Proclamation

“Now You are releasing Your servant, Master, according to Your word, in peace; 30 for my eyes have seen Your salvation, 31 which You have prepared before the face of all peoples; 32 a light for revelation to the nations, and the glory of Your people Israel.”^[3]

33 Joseph and his mother were marveling at the things which were spoken concerning Him, 34 and Simeon blessed them, and said to Mary, His mother, “Behold, this child is set for the falling and the rising of many in Israel, and for a sign which is spoken against. 35 Yes, a sword will pierce through your own soul, that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed.”

[1]Exodus 13:2, 12, 15 –”Sanctify to me all the firstborn, whatever opens the womb among the children of Israel, both of man and of animal. It is mine.” 12 that you shall set apart to Yahweh all that opens the womb, and every firstborn which you have that comes from an animal. The males shall be Yahweh’s. 15 When Pharaoh stubbornly refused to let us go, Yahweh killed all the firstborn in the land of Egypt, both the firstborn of man, and the firstborn of animal. Therefore I sacrifice to Yahweh all that opens the womb, being males; but all the firstborn of my sons I redeem.’

More Footnotes from This Section

[2] Leviticus 12:2-4, 8 – 12 Say to the Israelites, If a woman conceives and bears a male child, she shall be unclean seven days, unclean as during her monthly discomfort. 3 And on the eighth day the child shall be circumcised. 4 Then she shall remain [separated] thirty-three days to be purified [from her loss] of blood; she shall touch no hallowed thing nor come into the [court of the] sanctuary until the days of her purifying are over. 8 If she cannot afford a lamb, then she shall take two turtledoves, or two young pigeons; the one for a burnt offering, and the other for a sin offering: and the priest shall make atonement for her, and she shall be clean.’”

[3] Isaiah 42:6-7 –“I, Yahweh, have called you in righteousness, and will hold your hand, and will keep you, and make you a covenant for the people, as a light for the nations; 7 to open the blind eyes, to bring the prisoners out of the dungeon, and those who sit in darkness out of the prison. Jeremiah 2:11 – Has a nation changed its gods, which really are no gods? But my people have changed their glory for that which does not profit. Zechariah 2:5 – “For I,” says Yahweh, “will be to her a wall of fire around it, and I will be the glory in the middle of her.”

Your Twenty-Fourth Literary Gift Concludes

What do you think of your Twenty-Fourth Literary gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

If you like The Gospel Medley you can subscribe to my newsletter here to see all my blog posts and get free books every month. Or you can just stay at my blog, checking back every day until Christmas.

Psst! Audible lets you listen free to my books. Click here right now to find out how.

Posted on December 23, 2022December 23, 2022 by admin — 1 Comment

Your Twenty-Second Literary Gift of 25 Gifts

Your Twenty-Second Literary Gift of 25 Gifts to Christmas. Just in time for Christmas, you’ll enjoy this unique excerpt from my recent book, Zombie Detectiv e. This is perhaps Sam Melvin’s oddest case as a zombie detective.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here.

Your Twenty-Second Literary Gift: From Zombie Detective

Your Twenty-Second Literary Gift
New Science Books — Andy Zach’s new scifi detective mystery.

They sat in a nearby conference room. “How much do you know about Vegan Inc., Sam?”

“They’re a big ag firm that competes with Corn-All. They provide garden seeds for farmers and home gardeners. They sell a line of vegetables. That’s about it.”

“Right. I was recently tasked with a secret project to diversify into pig breeding.”

“OK. That’s a big leap.”

“Yes. It was high risk, high reward, so they threw it to me. I’m fresh from college and too dumb to know something is impossible.”

“So where do I come in?”

“Let me finish with the background. We wanted a fast-growing, healthy strain of pigs. I thought, Wouldn’t it be great if they grew as fast as zombie turkeys?”

“Uh-oh.”

“Right. I created a pig modified with zombie turkey and hippo and mouse DNA.”

“What?” Sam’s stomach clenched.

“I won’t go into all my failures with other combinations. This one worked. I get pigs that grow from piglets to full grown in four weeks.”

“But what’s the catch?”

“They look like hippos. And they grow only to about one pound.”

“Sounds more like a failure than a success.”

“They do taste like pork. And they reproduce fast enough to make up for their lack of size. But―” Bryce stopped and sighed.

“Tell me the worst.”

“They escaped my lab. They’re infesting the whole building. People keep finding them in the toilets. It’s very upsetting.”

“Are they zombies?”

The Threat

Micro-hippo

“No, I couldn’t get that to work with pigs, hippos, or mice.”

“Whew. That’s a load off my mind. Sounds like you need pest control.”

“Right. I couldn’t find any who would tackle it, so I called you.”

Sam rubbed his head. “I don’t know, Bryce.”

“You’re my last hope. If you don’t catch them all, I’m fired.”

“OK, I’ll give it a try. Just tell me one thing. Why is Vegan experimenting with pigs? Isn’t that against their image of a pure vegan, non-GMO food source?”

“Well, yes. That’s why the project was top secret. If I can get it to work, it’ll be a spin-off company, Perfect Pork.”

“All right. Let me take a look at the hippo-pigs, or whatever you call them.”

“Right now I’m calling them micro-hippos, but I’m sure the marketers will think of something more appealing.” Bryce stood. “Let’s go to the restroom.”

“You have to go?”

“No, that’s the quickest way to find them.”

They walked in. “Check every stall and toilet.”

Sam looked in the first toilet. A cute hippo looked at him and then disappeared down the drain with a swirl.

“I found one!”

“Good. Now let’s go to the cafeteria. That’s where they feed.”

“Yuck.”

“Right. That’s one more reason why we need you.”

Non-Standard Salad

Lunch hadn’t started, so there were just a few people scattered across the large cafeteria.

“First, we’ll go to the salad bar. Ah. They’ve been here. Don’t step in the hippo droppings.”

“How do they get up to the salad bar?”

“They climb as well as mice. Their feet are the least hippo-like. They’re more like rats or mice.” Bryce stirred the salad greens, then the fruit salad. Out popped two eyes peering above the strawberries, pineapple, and melon.

Your Twenty-Second Literary Gift Concludes

Sam Melvin, Zombie Detective

What do you think of your latest gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

If you like Zombie Detective you can subscribe to my newsletter here to see all my blog posts and get free books every month. Or you can just stay at my blog, checking back every day until Christmas.

Psst! Audible lets you listen free to my books. Click here right now to find out how.

Posted on December 23, 2022December 23, 2022 by admin — 3 Comments

Your Twenty-First Literary Gift of 25 Gifts

Your Twenty-First Literary Gift of 25 Gifts to Christmas. Just in time for Christmas, I have a zombie turkey apocalypse. This excerpt is from my first book, Zombie Turkeys. This excerpt is the first news conference after the plague breaks out.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here.

Your Twenty-First Literary Gift: From Zombie Turkeys

Chapter 4 icon

At the press conference, in the city council chamber, General Bagley motioned he would begin.

“At approximately seven p.m. last night, over a hundred thousand zombie turkeys attacked Joliet. They caused widespread death and destruction. The current number of victims is twelve hundred and seventy-three, with another eight hundred missing. The Federal Emergency Management Agency is assisting with recovery, notification of the next of kin, and finding lost people.” General Bagley spoke somberly to the assembled press.

“The first question to be answered is, how did the turkeys escape our military cordon? The turkeys boarded a string of barges in Hennepin and got off south of Joliet. From there, they went to Farm Fresh Turkey Farm, the largest turkey farm in Illinois, killed the workers there, and infected the seventy thousand turkeys.

“Simultaneously with this barge movement, a parallel attack of a flock of about two thousand zombie turkeys tried to escape the cordon by Spring Bay. They were eliminated by our troops. However, this simultaneous attack probably caused us to not detect the barge moving upstream.

“In response, we are suspending all barge traffic for the duration of this crisis. This zombie outbreak will not happen again,” the general asserted firmly.

“The next questions to be answered are, where are the turkeys now, and where will they attack next? Before I address this, let me reintroduce Dr. Edwin Galloway of the Poultry Research Institute in Northwestern University. Dr. Galloway.”

The Turkey Institute

“General Bagley invited me here today to share some of our latest findings on this turkey disease, which leads to the condition popularly called ‘zombie turkeys.’

“We’ve managed to induce zombiism in several varieties of turkey. We have also cured the disease in these turkeys, using salt water in various quantities and using various techniques: injection, mist, and bath.

“We have a small flock of zombie turkeys at the Poultry Institute and have tested exactly how much damage they can sustain and still revive. As we already know, chopping a turkey in half, or in smaller pieces, will defeat the regeneration process, as will burning them. However, merely burning their skin is not sufficient. Skin and feathers will grow back within hours, and both will be much tougher than normal—enough to stop buckshot smaller than 00. The turkey must be burnt until all the bacteria in it have been sterilized.

“Likewise, chopping off their heads, legs, wings, et cetera, will only cause them to regenerate much stronger than before. Most turkey farms cut off spurs and beaks to prevent damage to the turkeys. When the Farm Fresh turkeys were infected, the beaks and spurs grew back in the hour’s journey to Joliet. Even freshly killed turkeys in stores, that have not been frozen, when infected with the bacterium will revive within an hour, growing an entire set of organs. The armed forces are already going through the dead turkeys and chopping each carcass to ensure complete death and prevent resurrection.

The Most Important Fact

Your Twenty-First Literary
First Draft Complete — Zombie Turkeys fly to escape to Zombie Turkey hunters

“But the most important fact we have discovered is that after feeding, zombie turkeys go into a catatonic state for twenty-four to forty-eight hours. They burrow down in leaf mold or under bushes and twigs while they sleep off their meal. Their body temperature drops, and they are not detectable by infrared detectors. This explains the military’s difficulty in tracking them after these attacks. I now turn this conference back over to General Bagley.”

“Let me first express my gratitude towards Dr. Galloway and his team at the Poultry Institute. These findings have given us the advantage over our turkey foes. They led directly to the victory at the battle of Spring Bay, and they have given us help in finding the turkeys after the Joliet disaster.

“We are currently tracking the turkeys to their catatonic nests using dogs. We expect to neutralize a majority of these zombie turkeys over the next forty-eight hours. Ladies and gentlemen of the press, the floor is now open to questions.”

The Press Questions

“Dr. Galloway, what are you doing to prevent future infections of turkeys, wild and domestic? I understand several organic, free-range turkey farms have become infected with zombiism, and all present were lost,” asked Jill Holcomb of ABC News.

“At present, the only means of prevention is to daily mist your turkeys with a five percent saline solution. We have not found an effective antibiotic yet. We have informed the Turkey Growers Association of Illinois of this approach,” Dr. Galloway said,

“General Bagley, at the last press conference, you said the zombie turkeys wouldn’t escape the cordon and had no strategy. Yet they did, and you said the two groups of turkeys moved in tandem, causing you to miss the larger group. Wasn’t that a strategy?” asked Ed Fitzgerald of the Wall Street Journal.

“No. We discussed the possibility of increased intelligence in the zombie turkeys with Dr. Galloway. He has tested them, and they are not smarter than normal turkeys. However, they do travel in cohesive flocks, larger than natural turkey flocks. We believe that when the turkeys got on the barges, there wasn’t enough room for them all, and the flock split. The two flocks still followed the general direction upriver toward the east. What looked like a strategy was just unfortunate happenstance.”

Your Twenty-First Literary Gift Concludes

Your Twenty-First Literary
Your Best May Videos — The back of Zombie Turkeys

What do you think of your latest gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

If you like Zombie Turkeys you can subscribe to my newsletter here to see all my blog posts and get free books every month. Or you can just stay at my blog, checking back every day until Christmas.

Psst! Audible lets you listen free to my books. Click here right now to find out how.

Posted on December 22, 2022December 22, 2022 by admin — 1 Comment

Your Twentieth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts

Your Twentieth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts to Christmas. Just in time for Christmas, I have a Christmas story! This excerpt is from my non-fiction work, The Gospel Medley. In it, I’ve placed every word of the four gospels in chronological order. That includes this story.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here.

Your Twentieth Literary Gift: From The Gospel Medley

The Visit of the Wise Men

Your Twentieth Literary Gift
Gospel Medley Writer's Block: My Experience — The Gospel Medley cover. Click to get

Matthew 2:1–12
1 Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of King Herod, behold, wise men from the east came to Jerusalem, saying, 2 “Where is He who is born King of the Jews? For we saw His star in the east, and have come to worship Him.”

3 When King Herod heard it, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him. 4 Gathering together all the chief priests and scribes of the people, he asked them where the Christ would be born.

5 They said to him, “In Bethlehem of Judea, for this is written through the prophet,

6 ‘You Bethlehem, land of Judah, are in no way least among the
princes of Judah: for out of you shall come a governor, who shall
shepherd My people, Israel.’”
From Micah 5:2

King Herod’s Order to the Wise Men

7 Then Herod secretly called the wise men, and learned from them exactly what time the star appeared. 8 He sent them to Bethlehem, and said, “Go and search diligently for the young child. When you have found Him, bring me word, so that I also may come and worship Him.”

9 They, having heard the king, went their way; and behold, the star, which they saw in the east, went before them, until it came and stood over where the young child was. 10 When they saw the star, they rejoiced with exceedingly great joy.

11 They came into the house and saw the young child with Mary, His mother and they fell down and worshiped Him. Opening their treasures, they offered to Him gifts: gold, frankincense, and myrrh.

12 Being warned in a dream that they shouldn’t return to Herod, they went back to their own country another way.

Your Twentieth Literary Gift Concludes

What do you think of your latest gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

Psst! Audible lets you listen free to my books. Click here right now to find out how.

Posted on December 21, 2022December 21, 2022 by admin — 1 Comment

Your Nineteenth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts

Your Nineteenth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts to Christmas. Come along as we ride at Coaster World, where the Secret Supers are enjoying their summer vacation from seventh grade. It’s a good thing the part can accommodate four disabled teens. This excerpt is from my Villain’s Vacation novel.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

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Your Nineteenth Literary Gift: From Secret Supers in Space

The Secret Supers met at the rocket launch field after lunch. Only Dancer wore his orange-and-black uniform, complete with a black mask. We discovered wearing the uniform under our coveralls was too hot in the Alabama sun. Even the coveralls were discarded for shorts and T-shirts for this occasion.

“You ready, Dancer?” I held him in my lap on my chair.

Dancer stood and saluted.

“Here we go.” I picked him up and carefully placed him in the rocket payload section. I put my eye up to the tinted porthole in the passenger section and saw Dancer inside, looking back at me.

“Now the phone.” I pushed the phone into the clear tube above the passenger section. It had a round black bulkhead with controls that allowed Dancer to use the phone from his capsule. Then I fitted the nose cone on.

I double-checked the igniters on the three engines that powered the rocket. The nichrome wires were bent and fit into the engine nozzles and held in place by tape.

“We’re all ready, gang. Whoa, feel how heavy this is, Dan.” I handed him the rocket.

“Sure this will fly, Jeremy?” Dan hefted the rocket in his hands.

“Oh, yeah. Those engines pack quite a punch. There’ll be a total of forty newtons of thrust.”

“What’s a newton, Jeremy?”

“That’s a measure of force, Aubrey. Forty newtons is like ninety pounds.”

“So even a one-pound rocket will take off like you hit it with a sledgehammer.” Aubrey whistled. “How high will Dancer go?”

“According to my simulation program, about one hundred and eighty feet.”

The public address blared: “NEXT ROCKET: DANCER EXPRESS. PLEASE MOUNT IT ON THE LAUNCHER.”

“Here we go! Dan, you mount it. You’re taller, so you can get it on the launch rod.”

Hamster into the Blue

Dan and Aubrey walked over to the launch rack together. The rail had room for six rockets, each with its electrical clips for ignition and a blast deflector. The frame was three feet tall, with three-foot launch rods to guide the rockets after ignition.

Dan lifted the rocket over the launch rod and threaded it through the launch guides. Aubrey attached the alligator clips to the ignitors Jeremy had rigged. Jeremy and Kayla checked everything.

Aubrey peered into the porthole on the rocket.

“Dancer is waving!”

You might want to keep it quiet. Someone might get suspicious.

“Oh, right. Thanks, Kayla.”

“Countdown, rocketeers,” said the launch controller over a loudspeaker. “10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1—ignition!”

Six rockets flared on the launching rail and leapt into the blue sky.

As the largest and heaviest rocket, the Dancer Express was the slowest. We could see the rocket reach apogee and arch over. The rocket broke apart with a puff of smoke as the parachute ejected. One rocket part floated on a big orange-and-black parachute, and the other fell to the Earth.

“Oh no! The recovery cord broke!” I cried as I looked through my binoculars.

Oh No!

“Is Dancer in danger?”

“No, Aubrey, the payload tube is coming down slowly with the parachute. He should be okay. But the engine tube broke away from the parachute and is falling. Watch out, team!”

“Stay clear, everyone! Falling rocket,” the launch controller announced.

“I’ll go get it, Jeremy.” Aubrey ran to pick up the fallen rocket part.

“Uh-oh.”

What’s up, Jeremy?

“The wind’s picking up, Kayla. He’s worried about recovering Dancer,” Dan frowned, putting his hand on his head.

It’s not too high, only about a hundred feet to go.

“But it’s blowing right into the woods!” I began driving my wheelchair over the grass to the woods. I bumped crazily, but I didn’t care. Dan and Kayla followed. Kayla hung on to his arm.

Aubrey ran back with the engine tube and caught up to them. “I got it. Now let’s get Dancer.” She put the tube in the rocket holder I had rigged on the back of my wheelchair.

We followed the drifting rocket right into the woods. Then we lost sight of it in the trees.

“I’ll find it!”Aubrey ran ahead of us.

Help is Coming!

“I’m so worried we’ll lose Dancer,” I said.

Don’t worry. We’re the Secret Supers. We can find him.

“Thanks for reminding me, Kayla. You’re right. I’m my fillings are falling out on this rough ground.” I unbuckled my seatbelt and floated into the air.

“Whoa, Jeremy. I know we’ve got to find Dancer, but there are people behind us coming into the woods.”

“Thanks, Dan. At least I can make my wheelchair smoother.” I floated back into my seat, and the whole chair lifted a couple inches off the ground. “Tell me if anyone can see me and I’ll let it down.”

“Will do.”

“I see the rocket!” They heard Aubrey’s voice several hundred feet ahead of them.

“We’ll just stay ahead of the other people.” I floated Dan and Kayla in the air beside me,and we zoomed through the woods.

Ooh! This is like the chase through the woods in Endor.

“What’s Endor?”

That’s a scene in Star Wars, Return of the Jedi.

“I’ve got to catch up with all these movies I’ve never seen.”

Oops. Sorry, Dan.

“No problem. I’ve been blind since birth, and I’ve missed a lot of the movies you guys know. Now we can watch it together, and I can watch it through your eyes.”

Let’s make that a date!

“There’s Aubrey,” I said. We slowed down next to a large pine and settled in the fragrant needles beneath it. Fifty feet up, we saw the parachute and the payload section snagged in a branch.

Your Nineteenth Literary Gift Concludes

What do you think of your latest gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

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Posted on December 20, 2022December 20, 2022 by admin — 4 Comments

Your Eighteenth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts

Villain's Vacation cover What is it like?

Your Eighteenth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts to Christmas. Come along as we ride at Coaster World, where the Secret Supers are enjoying their summer vacation from seventh grade. It’s a good thing the part can accommodate four disabled teens. This excerpt is from my Villain’s Vacation novel.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

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Your Eighteenth Literary Gift: From Villain’s Vacation

Your Eighteenth Literary Gift
Villain's Vacation cover What is it like? — Villain’s Vacation cover

“Mac’s coming here now.”

He came in the door, walked to our table, and sat. “Sorry, but we weren’t able to find the kidnapper. We found the radio transmitter on the roof of the hotel. It had been left on to lead us there. We went through the hotel registry, but no one was on our list of terrorists or criminals in the country or the world. We talked with all the hotel residents, but everyone had an alibi when the kidnapping occurred.”

“That cuts it,” said Dad. “The villain is loose. We’re going home.”

“You might be safer here,” Mac said.

“What? How could that be?” asked Mom.

“We’re getting more Special Forces and plainclothes operatives here. We’ve got to get this criminal. What’s to stop them from following you back to Maryville and kidnapping you there?”

We sat silent, digesting our meal and this news.

“Crap. We can’t be safe in Maryville?” Dad looked Mac in the eye.

“I don’t think so. The Secret Supers destroyed a criminal hideout there this spring, sponsored by an international gang of criminals. This may be the same gang.

“I feel sick.” Mom covered her face with her hands.

Dan joked, “Maybe because the hamburgers were greasy?”

An Interruption

Just then Mrs. Robinson scooted up to our table in her walker. “There you are! I haven’t seen you since the boat ride. I’ve had so much fun with you, I wondered if you’d like to take the tour plane around the park and Lake Erie with me tomorrow. It’s about an hour tour.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Robinson, but we’re in the middle of a family planning meeting now. Could we get back with you?”

“Of course, Mr. Gentle. I’m sorry to interrupt. Do you have my cellphone?”

“I do,” I said

“Me too,” Dan added.

“I’m always misplacing my cellphone, so I don’t usually get people’s numbers,” said Aubrey.

“We’ll call you back when we’re free,” came Kayla’s response from her tablet.

“I’ll wait to hear from you.” She rolled away with one wheel on her walker squeaking.

The Security Plan

Your Eighteenth Literary
2021 Reviews — Villain’s Vacation Audio book

“I have a security plan for your family and the Secret Supers,” Mac told Dad.

“What?”

“We’ll provide an escort for each of you. That’ll leave me with other squad members to watch the area and the crowds around you. We should be able to catch the criminals if they try anything.”

“Will these guys go in the restrooms with us?” asked Aubrey.

“We have female operatives for you, Kayla, and Mrs. Gentle.”

“Let’s do it! I don’t want to go home,” Dan punched his fist into his palm.

“It doesn’t look like we have much choice,” said Dad.

“I would feel better having everyone escorted. I think we’ve given you children too much freedom,” said Mrs. Gentle.

“Nah, there we disagree, Denise. Some crazed criminal is not a usual danger. Our kids have been very responsible. So far.” Dad looked at all of us with narrowed eyes.

“Still, you should have told us after the first kidnapping,” said Mrs. Gentle.

“You’re right, Mom. No more Secret Supers to you and Dad,” I held my right hand up and the other over my heart.

Dad smiled. “We can be Alfred to your Batman, Jeremy. In on your secret, but discreet.”

“Let’s try this security arrangement out on the Galactic Black Hole. I want to ride that again,” Dan said.

“Okay,” said Mrs. Gentle, “but we’re going too. I want us all to stick together. I haven’t been on a coaster for ten years.”

The Galactic Black Hole

Your Eighteenth Literary Gift
quasar tsunami — quasar tsunami

We got into the coaster line like the animals going onto Noah’s ark: two by two. I barely needed to use my cane. I could read the mind of my agent next to me. He was worried about attack vectors. I asked him, “What’s your name?”

“Ed.”

That was all I got out of him. He didn’t want to talk. I skimmed the minds of the others in our group: Ann was with Aubrey, Barb with Kayla, Chip with Jeremy, Don with Mr. Gentle, and Fran with Mrs. Gentle.

I whispered to Kayla as she stood in front of me in line. “Their names are alphabetical.”

I think those are just code names.

“Mac too?”

Probably.

There’s another limitation of mind reading. I couldn’t delve into memories. The person had to recall the memory. If they used a code name I couldn’t tell.

We jumped into the coaster. “I had the front car the first time. This time, I want to ride in the back. I want to get the full experience,” I said to Ed as he settled next to me.

“Uh-huh.”

Roller Coaster

Writer's Block: My Experience — Chapter icon from Villain’s Vacation

Great conversationalist. But the ride was even better than it had been the day before. A couple of times, even Ed was surprised by a dip or turn that hurled us against the lap restraint. Kayla screamed her head off, as usual. I used her eyes to get a view of the stars and galaxies displayed around us.

We went around a turn and everything went black. I knew a big dip was coming. I was wrong. A huge hand encircled my chest. I felt the restraint fly off my lap as I was jerked into the air.

I took a big breath to yell, but the hiss of gas was the last thing I remembered.

Your Eighteenth Literary Gift Concludes

What do you think of your latest gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

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Posted on December 19, 2022December 19, 2022 by admin — 1 Comment

Your Seventeenth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts

Your Seventeenth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts to Christmas. Today we’ll look at my second series, Secret Supers. My campaign to give you 25 literary gifts by Christmas continues. This blog will give you a short excerpt from my Secret Supers novel.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here.

Your Seventeenth Gift: From Secret Supers

Your Seventeenth Literary Gift
Interesting Links — Secret Supers – click for free audiobook.

When the Secret Supers met at Jeremy’s home after school the next Monday, Jeremy said, “I’ve found four or five card tricks that’ll be great for Dan to do.”

“I thought of something too,” said Aubrey.

What’s that? Kayla thoughtcast.

“Dan can do the floating woman trick with Kayla. Jeremy can make her float, and Dan can use my old hula hoop to prove she’s not held up by wires.”

Why don’t you do the trick?

“You’re a lot better looking than I am. Whoever heard of a big burly girl working with a magician?”

“You’re not bad looking, Aubrey,” Jeremy said.

“Thanks, Jeremy, but I prefer weight lifting to being on stage.”

“How about weight lifting on stage?” asked Dan.

“Sounds weird. How would we work that into a magic act?”

“After we do the levitation trick, we go outside and you can pick up a car, with Jeremy’s help.”

That would be pretty spectacular. People would think the levitation trick was the grand finale and then you’d top it with the car. Kayla thoughtcast.

“It’d have to be a pretty small car. I can only lift about a thousand pounds. I tried again today, and that seems to be my limit.”

“Yeah, but my telekinesis seems to be getting more powerful as I use it. I picked up one end of our family’s car the other day.”

“Wow, Jeremy! Let’s try to lift it together, right now.” Aubrey got up and marched up the stairs, followed by her friends. Jeremy floated behind them, excited to try it.

Planning the Magic Show

Jeremy sat in his wheelchair in front of the elevator. He’d left it there when he floated downstairs.

“Mom’s making dinner, but I don’t want her suddenly seeing me floating around.”

“I’ll let you know if she comes looking for you,” Dan assured him.

“Thanks, Dan. Well, here goes.” The back end of the car came up about six inches.

“That’s great, Jeremy! Let’s see if I can hold up my end of the bargain.” Aubrey squatted by the front bumper, grabbed it firmly in her hands, and slowly straightened her legs.

“You did it,” shouted Jeremy.

“Yeah.” She gasped. “But only for a short time.” She put it back down. “Whew! That was my limit.”

“That’s good,” said Jeremy. “You want to give the impression of it being very difficult.”

Now, what we need is a script.

“What do you mean, Kayla?”

These magic shows are carefully planned for drama and anticipation. We’ve got to plan and practice every word.

“Who can write a script like that?” wondered Dan.

I can. It’s just like an English assignment: ‘Write your own magic show, like Penn and Teller.’ I’ve watched them on YouTube.

“Suppertime!” Jeremy’s Mom called from the door to the garage.

“Great! I’ve worked up an appetite,” said Aubrey.

“It’s chili and cornbread today,” said Dan. “My mouth is already watering.”

Show Time

Your Seventeenth Litrary Gift
Aubrey Wilcosky — Aubrey, super powered heroine.

The four friends worked on their script and show until Saturday came. Kayla’s mom made a black magician’s robe for Dan and sparkling tights for Kayla. Aubrey wore black tights trimmed with glitter. Jeremy would be the emcee and had a top hat and coat like a circus ringmaster.

People packed the City Hall meeting room. Right in front was Rich Vandemere with his dad and Betty Jones.

“Hi, Mrs. Jones, Rich. You must be Mr. Vandemere?” Jeremy greeted them from his wheelchair.

“Yeah, that’s me,” said the big man gruffly. “Call me Bob.”

“Thanks for coming out and supporting our fund-raiser.”

“It’s the least we could do,” said Mrs. Jones. “We don’t want to see you out of school any more than you do.”

“Uh, Mrs. Jones, are you friends with Rich and Mr.Vandemere?” asked Aubrey, who walked up next to Jeremy

She laughed. “We’re married. Rich is our son. I just kept my name from my first marriage. I was grief-stricken when my husband George died. Then I met Bob. I kept my first husband’s name in memorium.”

“O-o-o-h. I didn’t know,” said Aubrey, turning red.

“Have a good show!” she wished them.

The Show Begins

Your Seventeenth Literary Gift
Your Sixth Literary Gift Love These Superheroes — Dan Elanga – He can read minds and sensory impressions.

Seven o’clock came. Jeremy went behind the curtains they’d fixed at the back of the room. Dan, Kayla, and Aubrey were there.

“Ready?” he asked.

We’re all ready and excited!

“Break a leg!” said Aubrey. “That’s the traditional show business wish.”

“I can’t say that to you, Aubrey.” Jeremy looked at her artificial legs, covered by the black tights.

“I’m sure I could break them if I put my mind to it!”

“Get going already, Jeremy. I’m all antsy,” Dan said.

Jeremy cut the lights to the room. He’d rigged a remote lighting control next to his wheelchair joystick. He touched a button and one spotlight lit the stage and then turned on his lapel mike.

“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Maryville Middle School charity magic show!” he announced, bowing from his wheelchair and doffing his top hat. “Prepare to be dazzled by displays of legerdemain never before seen or performed!

Behind the curtain, Aubrey whispered to Kayla, “What’s legerdemain?”

It’s just a fancy term for magic. Jeremy’s showing off.

Card Tricks

“From the depths of deepest, darkest Africa, I present to you, the soon-to-be world-famous magician, Daniel Elanga!”

With calm aplomb, Dan strode to the middle of the stage. “Greetings, friends! It’s traditional to begin a magic show with card tricks.” He produced a deck from his pocket, started to shuffle it, and fumbled it all over the floor. The audience broke into laughter.

“However, I am terrible with cards.” More laughter ensued. Dan tapped his dark glasses with his white cane. “Blind, you know. But I’m great at reading minds. Now, everyone knows how magicians do these mentalist tricks. They have plants in the audience and marked cards and substitute decks. So I’ll break all the rules. First, I’ll have my assistant, Kayla Verdera, present an unopened deck of cards.” Kayla walked out with her walker, flourishing a plastic sealed deck.

“Kayla, please give that deck to one of the audience members. I promise not to look.” The audience twittered with nervous laughter.

Jeremy assumed they weren’t used to blind people joking about their blindness.

The Cards Revealed

Kayla gave the deck to a startled Mrs. Jones. Jeremy wheeled up to her. “Thank you, ma’am. Would you give us your name?”

“Betty Jones.”

“Have you ever seen this deck before?”

“No, I haven’t”

“Please open the deck and fan out the cards.”

Betty did so and showed them to the audience.

“Do they look perfectly normal to you?”

“Sure.”

“Let me look. I’m more familiar with cards,” said Mr. Vandemere. He peered at them and felt them carefully. “They don’t seem to be marked. They’re just a new deck.”

“Now, Mrs. Jones, please pick a card and don’t show anyone.”

“I’ll pick one too,” said Mr.Vandemere. “You pick one too, Rich.”

That’s not how the script is supposed to go!

“Great idea,” said Dan. “I’ll tell you what each of you has.”

“This I gotta see,” said Mr.Vandemere. He switched cards with Rich, and then again with his wife.

Dan, they all switched cards!

“Now, I must open my inner eye to see.” Dan paused dramatically, his hands on his temples.

”I see the three cards. But they’ve been switched.” The audience gasped. “Very clever of you.”

“Rich Vandemere, please stand.”

He’s improvising!

“You have your Dad’s original card, right?”

“Right.”

“It’s the seven of spades, isn’t it?”

“I’ll be—”

“Please show the audience.”

Rich held up the card, the seven of spades. The audience applauded.

Your Seventeenth Literary Gift Concludes

Applause!

“Bob Vandemere, please stand.”

He stood, looming taller than them all.

“You have your wife’s original card?”

“Yeah.”

“Isn’t it the jack of hearts?”

“I don’t believe it.” Mr.Vandemere held up the jack of hearts for the audience to see.

Louder applause filled the room.

“Finally, Mrs. Betty Jones, please stand up. You have your son’s card, I believe?”

“Yes.”

“Please confirm it’s the ten of clubs.” Betty gasped and held the ten of clubs aloft. The crowd cheered, giving Dan a standing ovation.

Your Sixteenth Literary Gift – What do you think?

Andy Zach
Your Seventeenth Literary Gift — Andy Zach in repose

What do you think of your gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

If you like Secret Supers you can subscribe to my newsletter here to see all my blog posts and get free books every month. Or you can just stay at my blog, checking back every day until Christmas.

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Posted on December 17, 2022December 17, 2022 by admin — 3 Comments

Your Fifteenth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts

Your Fifteenth Literary Gift of 25 Gifts to Christmas. I’m your friendly humorous, SciFi author Andy Zach. This blog will give you–supporting characters.

They’re from the Paranormal Privateers, Lulu Guitierez and Sharon Windham are bodyguards for the Paranormal Privateers and Diane Newby in particular. Why? You’ll have to read My Undead Mother-in-law to find out. But they’re a coloreful pair. Your free excerpt is below.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

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Your Fifteenth Gift: Paranormal Privateers

Chapter 2 – Haradhere

Your Fifteenth Literary Gift
About Paranormal Privateers — Chapter 2 icon

The reek of high explosive hung in the black cargo container as I awoke. My whole body ached like a two-a-day football practice followed by a sound beating. I knew that meant I was no longer a zombie.

My last memory was shielding the women with my body. Where were they? Where was Diane?

“Diane?” My voice came out as a croak.

Someone groaned in the dark. “Is that you, Diane?”

“No, it’s Lulu. Diane’s here. You awake, Diane?”

“Oooh,” Diane moaned.

I felt grit, dirt, fléchettes, and blood on the bottom of the container as I crawled to her voice.

“I’m here, honey.” I took her into my arms. She felt small—and bloody. “Are you OK?”

“I hurt all over. I haven’t felt this bad since we battled the zombie ninjas and I got impaled with the naginata.”

“They must have used fléchette rockets.”

“Yes, they shot you, and then they shot us. Lulu, Sharon, how are you doing?”

“I’ve been better,” Lulu said.

“This is what we signed up for when we became your bodyguards. We haven’t done too well so far,” Sharon said. She sounded…good.

“Sharon, are you still a zombie?” I asked.

Sharon Wyndham

“No and yes. I lost my zombie infection and power—and then I reinfected myself with my zombie blood capsule as soon as I awoke a couple of minutes ago.”

“I forgot mine! It’s been so long since I was in battle. I left it in my room.”

“You can have mine, Diane,” I offered.

“No worries. Sharon and I both carry spares.”

We all injected the blood capsules. They looked like EpiPens, used to treat anaphylactic shock from allergic reactions to bee stings. Punching the capsule into one’s leg shot a milliliter of blood through a needle into your bloodstream.

The zombie bacteria doubled in quantity every twenty minutes. When it encountered damaged tissue, it replaced it by copying the DNA into itself. Over time, a zombie would become almost entirely this replicated tissue. The zombie tissue was twice as strong as normal tissue. The muscle fibers flexed twice as fast. Even one’s skin became as tough as nails.

That was how we survived the saltwater fléchettes. Although they killed the bacteria in the blood, it took a while to kill all the bacteria. The surviving bacteria patched us up enough to live—and then it died. Whoever planned our capture—probably Ogala—knew a lot about zombies.

Lulu Guitierrez

“I’m glad they didn’t think to search us for our capsules,” I commented.

“Perhaps they didn’t know about the technology?” Lulu speculated.

“They should!” Diane insisted. “I helped invent that with Maggie, my daughter-in-law, three years ago when we first began fighting for zombie rights!”

“But, dear,” I murmured, “Zombies are mostly confined to the US, where people have a right to be a zombie. The rest of the world, especially a backwater like Somalia, doesn’t know all the tech that goes with us. They fear zombies, like the old US, and don’t allow us to immigrate or any zombie blood to be transported.”

“Hah!” Diane snorted. “Do you know how many millions of dosages of blood we’ve shipped around the world in the past three years?”

“Yes, I know it’s used to treat disease worldwide, but people usually get—and governments require—the anti-zombie antibiotic afterward.”

“Dummies!”

I chuckled. Diane had no understanding of anyone who had the least fear of zombies.

George Newby

We sat quietly in the darkness for an hour, gaining strength and healing.

“I know they’re sending the zombie animals to attack, but I’d like to get out and greet them.” Diane cared for all the zombie corgis, bulls, and turkeys that we kept on board the ship.

“I’m feeling pretty good. Let’s see if I can make a dent in that door.” I went to the door and felt carefully around the edges. There were no gaps, but the door wriggled slightly against the steel rods holding it closed.

“Hmmm. I might as well attack the sides of the container as the door. I don’t want to bang against it, but that’s the only way to fatigue the metal and bust out of here. What’s to stop them from coming and firing another fléchette rocket or two?”

“How about if we get out with one big bang?” Sharon said.

“How do we do that?”

“I’ve got two shaped explosive charges right here.”

“And I’ve got two more,” Lulu added.

“How? How did you smuggle them in?”

“Let’s just say our figures had some additional padding,” Lulu said, smiling in the dark.

Padding Their Escape

“Oho! Your padded bras have C4 explosive!” Diane exclaimed. “I wish I had thought of that. I’ll do that from now on!”

“You got it in one,” Sharon admitted.

“You don’t need any more padding,” I said sotto voce.

Our bodyguards fixed the four shaped charges around the door, right behind the two steel rods holding the door closed. We retreated to the other end of the container and covered our ears as Lulu detonated them.

BANG! The pressure wave bounced off our end of the container and slammed into the back of the door, now containing four holes where the rods used to be. The door squealed on its hinges and opened.

“It worked!” Diane said.

Your Fifteenth Literary Gift – What do you think?

Your Fifteenth Literary Gift
Quizzes, Questions — Try out my audiobook.

What do you think of your gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

If you like Paranormal Privateers, you can subscribe to my newsletter here to see all my blog posts and get free books every month. Or you can just stay at my blog, checking back every day until Christmas.

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Posted on December 14, 2022December 14, 2022 by admin — 3 Comments

Your Twelfth Literary Gift of My 25 Gifts to You

Your Twelfth Literary Gift of My 25 Gifts to you. Hi! I’m author Andy Zach and I’ve been busy sharing literary gifts with my readers until Christmas. Today’s your twelfth gift!

I’ll now give you my graphics novel, at least the first six pages of it.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here.

Let’s begin with the graphic novel – Zombie Turkeys.

Your Twelfth Literary Gift: Zombie Turkeys

I began to convert my novel into a graphic novel many years ago. I worked closely with my illustrator and comic artist, Sean ‘Fuzzy’ Flanagan.

Here’s one cover.

And here’s the inside page.

Finally, your first page.

I gave you some more detail so you could study it. Take your time. Page two is next

The Hunters Arrive – Your Twelfth Literary Gift

Do you want to see more? Keep scrolling!

The Turkey Revives

The ‘Battle’ – Hunter versus Zombie Turkey

That covers the first page of my book.

Do you see how Fuzzy put the cover image on the turkey?

Amazon Kindle made me change the cover for the Kindle edition. It was ‘too bloody.’

Best Science Stories Zombie Turkeys Gift — Get your Zombie Turkeys here. You get a bushel of laughter with each book.

The Aftermath

The last image is the next couple of pages of the book.

Here Ends Your Gift

What do you think of your gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

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Posted on December 13, 2022December 13, 2022 by admin — 7 Comments

Your Tenth Literary Gift – More from My New Book!

Your Tenth Literary Gift
Your Ninth Literary Gift
Your Eighth Literary Gift
Secret Supers in Space

Enjoy Your Tenth Literary Gift – More from My New Book! I am author Andy Zach and I just self-published Secret Supers in Space here. You get an autographed copy directly from me with free shipping. You can also buy it and the ebook on Amazon by clicking here.

If you want a free ebook to review, click here.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds with a comment or email will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here.

Today, I’ll give you the opening few pages of Secret Supers in Space.

Your Tenth Literary Gift: Chapter 1 – Space Camp

Your Tenth Literary Gift
Jeremy Gentle — Jeremy, seventh-grade superhero

“What are you doing, Jeremy?”

Startled, I looked up from my computer and turned around in my wheelchair. My best friend, Dan, had slipped silently into my lab. I still thought of it that way, but we’d made it into the Secret Supers clubhouse almost a year ago. Dan’s round, brown face smiled down at me while his tall, wide frame loomed behind me. His dark glasses hid his blind eyes.

“I didn’t hear you come down the elevator.”

“I took the stairs. Your mom made cookies, so I came over. I could smell them from my house.”

“You mean, you could smell them from my mom’s thoughts?”

“And your’s and your dad’s. You were all excited, so I couldn’t help myself from taking a sniff from your mom’s nose. I didn’t snoop any further than that.”

“I know you respect everyone’s privacy with your mindreading power.”

“Except maybe yours. You did permit me to read yours anytime. But I haven’t read your mind about what you’re concentrating on. C’mon, tell your old friend Dan.”

“Don’t tell anyone. I want to surprise the Secret Supers.”

“Of course not. Now I’m dying to know!”

“I’m applying to Space Camp.”

“What’s Space Camp? I can hear the capital letters in your voice.”

I spun my wheelchair around to face him. “What’s Space Camp? It’s the greatest camp there is! We’re all bored out of our minds now that August has started and we want to do something. Space Camp teaches you all about our space program. You learn about astronauts and rockets. You go on a centrifuge and experience zero-g and moon gravity.

Dan Elanga Stops By

Your Tenth Literary Gift
Your Sixth Literary Gift Love These Superheroes — Dan Elanga – He can read minds and sensory impressions.

“Sounds fun and cool. I can see them accepting you, Jeremy, but how about the rest of us? I guess Kayla would make it, but Aubrey and I are just average students.”

“As far as I can tell, there are no qualifications, just an interest in space and rocketry.”

“I sure got more interested in space after our adventure chasing the villain in a rocket at the coaster park this summer. What about the money?” Dan sat down in the chair so I didn’t have to look up at him.

“Mom and Dad have been saving the royalties from Secret Supers and Villain’s Vacation for you, Kayla, and Aubrey, and you can use that for the camp.”

“Well, count me in!” Dan’s huge hand engulfed mine. I felt like a little kid—which I was. I didn’t usually think about how small I was until Dan was right next to me. Or Aubrey, who was also Dan’s size.

“I just thought of a problem.” Dan frowned, his brows hitting his dark glasses. “What about my parents? And Kayla’s and Aubrey’s?”

Kayla Verdera

“Mom and Dad have already been in touch with them ever since our royalties from the books have been coming in. They all agreed to divide them. Everyone’s just waiting on me to tell all the Secret Supers.”

“Now I know, so we might as well let Kayla and Aubrey know.”

I glanced at my screen clock. “Ten thirty. I can call Kayla, but Aubrey’s at her summer baseball practice.” I speed-dialed Kayla.

“You don’t have to put her on speakerphone. I can read her mind.”

I laughed. “You read my mind. I was ready to do that.”

Hello, Jeremy. Kayla’s voice sounded in my mind. Kayla had spinal meningitis and could no longer talk or walk without a walker. I felt sad when I heard her high mental voice, sounding just as she used to talk before losing it.

“Hi, Kayla. I’ve got big news for you and Aubrey: the Secret Supers are going to Space Camp!”

Sounds like fun. I assume it’s all paid for and our parents are on board?

“Right. I researched it, then my parents contacted yours, Dan’s, and Aubrey’s, and everyone agreed. Just now, I applied and got approval. We’ll be gone for a week.”

When?

The Last to Find Out

“The last week in August, just before Labor Day.”

Now I have something to look forward to, instead of another sweltering day. How long does it last?

“A week. We arrive on the last Sunday of the month and leave on Friday.”

Is Dan there?

“Yeah, I’m here Kayla.” Dan leaned over my shoulder.

“How’d you know, Kayla? Dan snuck up on me as I was applying to the camp online. Are you mind reading now as well as sending thoughts?”

No, just sending, like always. I just know you, Jeremy. You don’t give up secrets until you have to. I figured Dan would be there. He sees you about every day. Say, where is this Space Camp?

“Huntsville, Alabama. We’re driving down there the day before in our big van. It’ll take us about twelve hours, dad said.”

Aubrey Wilkosky

I suppose you want me to tell Aubrey. I’ll give her the message to come over to our Secret Supers room, and we’ll all surprise her when she comes in.

“Great idea, Kayla!” I grinned.

Dan’s head snapped up from the phone and then he leaned back down. “You can tell her now. Her practice was canceled because of a thunderstorm. Boy, is she grumpy!”

“Baseball’s the love of her life,” I said. “A new adventure will cheer her up.”

All right, I told her to meet us there. She’s riding her bike straight from practice.

Dan placed his hand on his head like he does when he’s listening telepathically. “Uh, oh, Kayla, you’d better hurry. She’ll beat you here.”

I didn’t think of that. Mom’s busy at work. I can’t interrupt her, and I can’t bike anymore.

I straightened in my wheelchair. “Let me give you a lift—literally.”

Now you’re reading my mind, Jeremy. I was just about to ask you for help. Are you sending your flying car?

“Nope. Just put on your Secret Supers outfit and I’ll fly you over.”

“I’ll put on mine. It’s here in my backpack.” Dan slid it off his shoulders.

I hadn’t noticed Dan’s backpack. I turned to my phone. “We’ll make it a full club meeting. This’ll be the first time we’ve worn the new costumes your mom made for us, Kayla.”

The New Supersuits

I modeled mine for Mom. They fit a lot better than the store-bought ones we had, and they’re much sturdier. The old ones were pretty scuffed up.

“Something about fighting ten-foot robots does that.” Dan grinned.

Kayla laughed, in their heads. Ha! Not to mention flying at a hundred miles per hour chasing speedboats and rockets.

“Are you ready, Kayla? I can picture your front porch in my mind and pick you up there.”

Just about. Let me get my boots on. There. I’m ready.

I imagined Kayla standing on her front porch. I exerted my telekinesis.

Okay, Jeremy, can you pick me up another fifty feet? Then I’ll be clear of any telephone or power wires between my house and yours.

“Sure.” I pulled her toward my house at a steady rate.

All right, I’m right over your yard, Jeremy. That was something! I felt like a flying superhero. But carrying my walker.

“But no cape.” Dan grinned as he talked into Jeremy’s phone.

Right, Dan. The best superheroes don’t have capes, and we don’t either. But we do have masks.

The elevator came down. Dan and I greeted Kayla as she got out in her walker. My parents had installed the elevator when I got my first electric wheelchair in first grade.

“Sorry, Kayla, I should have helped you walk like I usually do.”

No problem, Jeremy. You won’t always be around to help me. I still have hope I’ll be able to regain my strength and balance if I keep working at therapy. And your mom gave me a chocolate chip cookie on the way. Kayla pulled out a warm, soft cookie from the purse hanging from her walker.

Aubrey Arrives Bringing Your Tenth Literary Gift

I liked seeing Kayla’s pretty features face-to-face. Her dark eyes were framed by the black mask and her black hair rested on the scarlet tights. Still, she had a handkerchief in her hand. She tended to drool because she couldn’t control her muscles.

“Uh, I’m the only one not in uniform. I’d better change.” A uniform flew out of the cupboard as I rose from my wheelchair and flew into the bathroom.

“You’d better hurry, Jeremy. Aubrey’s coming here at full speed! She’s keeping up with traffic on her bike. She’s using her super strength.” Dan called after me from the other room.

“Ha! Dan, I’m almost as fast as any superhero. Kayla, did you tell Aubrey to wear her uniform?” I yelled from the bathroom as I dressed telekinetically, pulling the tights over my legs twisted by a lifetime of cerebral palsy. It did fit better than the old uniform. Even the boots went on better. I loved the material I selected. It was completely air tight and waterproof. It fit beautifully with the other secret enhancements I’d put in. I wondered when I should tell the others about them.

Of course—

THUMP! THUMP! KA-THUMP!

I don’t need to read minds to know that’s Aubrey. No one else pounds as she does down the stairs.

The door to the clubroom burst open. “TA-DA! I’m here. I came here at the speed of light, on a bicycle.”

Coming out of the bathroom, I saw Aubrey’s tousled blond hair peeking out of her baseball cap. Sweat beaded her broad forehead. Her black mask and red Secret Supers uniform clashed with her green ball cap. Instead of black boots, her prosthetic legs went to her knees.

Here Ends Your Tenth Literary Gift

Your Ninth Literary Gift
Your Eighth Literary Gift
Your

You can get a free copy to review by clicking here right now. Follow the instructions and then you’ll get your free book.

What do you think of your tenth gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

If you like Secret Supers in Space, you can subscribe to my newsletter here to see all my blog posts and get free books every month. Or you can just stay at my blog, checking back every day until Christmas.

Posted on December 9, 2022December 9, 2022 by admin — 5 Comments

Your Ninth Literary Gift – A New Book! – Is it Christmas?

Your Ninth Literary Gift
Your Eighth Literary Gift
Secret Supers in Space

Here is Your Ninth Literary Gift – my ninth book! I am author Andy Zach. You can get Secret Supers in Space here. This is the autographed copy directly from me. You can also buy it and the ebook on Amazon by clicking here.

If you want a free book to review, click here.

Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. As always, everyone who responds will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here.

Today, I’ll introduce you to the villains of Secret Supers in Space.

Chapter 1 – Space Camp – Villains

“Hi, Loretta. Are you all refreshed from your Paris vacation?”

I looked at my wall-sized monitor in my home. My boss and grandpa John Smith smiled genially at me. He might call me any time, day or night, but he always knew where to project his image so we could have a video conference. He stroked his salt-and-pepper pompadour in the bright sunlight. I could see the sea in the background. I knew his hideout was on some island. Now I could calculate it from the angle of sunlight—but I had to answer him first.

“Hi, Papa Smith. Yes. I had a lot of fun waterskiing on the Riviera. I also cheated the casino in Monaco out of a million bucks.”

“Of course.

“But now I’m refreshed and bored. I haven’t had a job since I left for Coaster World.”

“I’m glad to hear you say that. I’ve got a challenging assignment for you—the Secret Supers.”

“Ugh! I sure want to get back at them. But they’re backed up by the NSA. I’m not eager to tackle them and the US government.”

Papa stroked his hair. “The best cure for falling off a horse is to get back on. How about if I get a partner for you?”

“They’d better be awfully competent. I can’t really work with anyone who’s incompetent, or average, or merely a genius.”

“How about if you and I work together?”

Two Villains in One Book

“That’d be wonderful! I’ve got some ideas I’d like to try out on our little red-uniformed friends.”

“Me too. I’ve got some news too. They’re going to Space Camp. Jeremy just applied today.”

“So are you intercepting their internet signals?”

“And cell phone communication. It’s easy as pie once you’re in their wireless network.”

“Let’s do this!”

Your Ninth Literary Gift – Chapter 2 – Arrival – Villains

My wall screen lit up in my living room. A beautiful view of the ocean from a tall hill of white rock greeted me. My grandfather, John Smith, walked into view. Holding a martini in his hand, he smiled at me as he stroked his gray-and-white pompadour.

“Hi, Loretta. Are you ready to finally get the Secret Supers?”

“It seems like a piece of cake. They’re easy pickings at Space Camp.”

“Isn’t that what you thought about Coaster World?”

“Yeah.”

Papa took a sip from his drink. “The secret is to take them when they’re sure they’re safe.”

“On their way home?”

“No. At Cape Canaveral.”

“They’re not even going there!”

“Yes, they are, but they don’t know it yet. Let me tell you all about it.”

Your Ninth Literary Gift Concludes

You can get a free copy to review by clicking here right now.

What do you think of your ninth gift? Let me know right here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

Posted on December 6, 2022December 6, 2022 by admin — 5 Comments

Your Sixth Literary Gift! – 19 Gifts Until Christmas

Here is Your Sixth Literary Gift from me, author Andy Zach. I don’t know how you feel about these gifts, but I’m enjoying giving them away. Let me know what you think by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. Everyone who responds will get a free book from me.

My past gifts to you are here:

If you want to keep track of all my blog posts and get free books you can subscribe to my newsletter by clicking here.

My second sci-fi series revolves around four seventh-graders who suddenly get superpowers. Here’s an excerpt.

Car Wash – Chapter 9 of Secret Supers

“My brother Rich is coming with some of his football buddies. Oh, here’s our first customer.” The girls cheered and did some cheerleading routines while the Secret Supers washed the car. Jeremy used an electric scrubber from his wheelchair. Kayla used the power washer, while Dan and Aubrey soaped up the car.

Rich and his friends arrived. “Great!” yelled Darla. “Now we can do two cars at once. Let’s get a production line going. Here come some more cars. Keep cheering girls.”

“This isn’t so bad,” Dan said.

“Nah. Just putting on soapy water isn’t a problem. I’m glad I can walk now.” said Aubrey.

Rich called to them, “I’m surprised you guys came.”

“It seems the least we can do. You guys were nice enough to come to our magic show,” said Aubrey.

“That was really good. I think I got the card trick figured out, but not the levitation stuff.”

“Keep thinking. It’s a good practice.”

Dan Detects Trouble

“Oh no,” Dan yelled.

“What’s the matter, Dan?” Jeremy asked.

“My parents’ house is on fire!”

“Did you get a text or something?” asked Darla.

“Uh, yeah.”

“Sorry to leave you in the lurch, Darla, but we’ve got to go and help,” said Aubrey.

“What can you do?”

“More than you think.”

“I’ve already called my car,” said Jeremy.

“Your car? You’re not old enough to drive,” asked Darla.

“I made a flying car. I can summon it here. See, there it is.”

Darla’s, the cheerleaders’, Rich’s, and the football players’ mouths dropped open as Jeremy’s car came flying down the street, as fast as any other car. Jeremy and Dan had modified it so it had a rumble seat in the back for Kayla and two running boards with grips and safety lines like a fire truck, for Dan and Aubrey to stand.

“That is SO COOL,” screamed Darla.

Your Sixth Literary Gift -From The Secret Supers

Your Sixth Literary Gift
Jeremy Gentle — Jeremy, seventh grade superhero with telekinesis

The Secret Supers climbed into the car. Jeremy transferred carefully from his wheelchair to the driver’s seat, not using his telekinesis.

“We’ll come back if we can. Watch my electric wheelchair,” said Jeremy as they zoomed off.

“Wow, Jeremy! You’re really going fast,” said Aubrey over the rushing wind

“I told you I was getting stronger. I think we’ll have to modify this again for full seats for you and Dan.”

“Hurry,” said Dan. “They’re trapped in the basement!”

“Okay, let me open her up.” The car sped up, and they began passing other cars on the road.

“Fifty-five, sixty miles an hour! That seems to be my limit, now. Hey, did someone call the fire department?”

“I did before we started,” said Dan who continued to read the thoughts of his family. “Oh hurry!, The smoke is getting thick! They’re lying on the basement floor with wet clothes over their faces!”

A line of cars at a red light blocked them.

Kayla Shields Up

“Hold on! Kayla, shields up!”

Shields up, Captain Jeremy!

The car faded into invisibility as Kayla projected the scene behind their car into the eyes of the people in front of them.

“No one saw that,” said Dan, holding on for dear life as they soared over the cars and traffic lights. “Please hurry! My little sister is coughing on the smoke.”

“I guess we can dispense with the roads. My GPS says if we take a twenty-degree turn—”

“Look out for the high-tension wires,” screamed Aubrey.

Six high-voltage wires blocked their path, less than twenty feet away.

“Hold on,” yelled Jeremy.

The car dropped like an elevator with its cable cut. The Secret Supers ducked, and the wires passed where their heads had been a moment before. They could feel the hairs on their heads lift up from the intense voltage a foot away.

“Look out, a tree,” shouted Aubrey.

The car swerved around and over an oak tree blocking their path.

The Elanga’s house blazed ahead, a pillar of fire and smoke rooted in the disintegrating house.

Swooping down, Jeremy brought the car to a skidding halt in front of the house. A wall of heat burned their faces. Acrid smoke assailed their noses. In the distance, fire engine sirens blared.

Aubrey to the Rescue!

Your Sixth Literary Gift
Aubrey Wilcosky — Aubrey is a super-powered heroine.

Oh no! Dan, are we too late? Kayla thoughtcast.

“No, they’re still alive in the basement. But the stairs are blocked, and they can’t get out. I don’t know how we’ll get them out,” wailed Dan.

“I do,” yelled Aubrey as she charged at the door.

“Oh no, Aubrey! That’ll let oxygen in,” yelled Jeremy.

“And me,” she said as she crashed through the door. Smoke engulfed Aubrey and she disappeared.

The house exploded into greater flame.

Your Sixth Literary Gift Concludes

Your Sixth Literary Gift
Best Science Stories or Science Fiction More Good Things Best Book Reviews — Click to listen to free sample of Secret Supers.

Don’t miss your free audiobook sample. Click here today.

Let me hear your opinion of this gift! Contact me here. Don’t forget I’ll give you a free book after I get your email.

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Posted on December 4, 2022December 4, 2022 by admin — 5 Comments

Your Fourth Literary Gift! – 21 Gifts Until Christmas

Here is Your Fourth Literary Gift on our journey to Christmas day, from me, Andy Zach. Every day in December, from the first to the twenty-fifth I will give you a piece of my writing every day.

My past gifts are:

As always, you can keep track of all my blog posts and get free books from my newsletter. Subscribe by clicking here.

From my book Paranormal Privateers, enjoy this section from chapter eleven I’ve entitled “Pyrotechnics”.

Chapter 11 – Gulf of Mexico

Your Fourth Literary Gift — Chapter icon for Chapter 11.

“How many warheads?” the President asked.

“Seventy-two independent warheads. Each with a nuclear bomb,” General Figeroa said.

“How close to the saucer?”

“Within ten miles. But due to an ‘error,’ we’ll be within a mile. Each warhead will head toward the mothership. They’ll detonate within a hundred yards,”

The alien disk swelled like a giant pie plate. A bright flash and the nose cone exploded.

“Now—oh!”

The warheads exploded into seventy-two baby suns, engulfing the mothership.

“All warheads have detonated,” said mission control.

“I expected something more dramatic,” Figeroa said.

“No sound effects either,” said the President.

“We didn’t have the budget for that,”

Your Fourth Literary Gift – Sidekicks

I thought I’d give you smaller segments today. Let me know if you like large excerpts or short snippets by clicking here or emailing me at [email protected]. I’ll give you a free book for your feedback.

This excerpt is entitled, ‘Sidekicks’. Lulu and Sharon are the bodyguards for the Undead Mother-in-law Diane and her husband George. This is also from Paranormal Privateers.

Your Fourth Literary Gift
About Paranormal Privateers — Chapter 2 icon

“How about if we get out with one big bang?” Sharon said.

“How do we do that?”

“I’ve got two shaped explosive charges right here.”

“And I’ve got two more,” Lulu added.

“How? How did you smuggle them in?”

“Let’s just say our figures had some additional padding,” Lulu said, smiling in the dark.

“Oho! Your padded bras have C4 explosive!” Diane exclaimed. “I wish I had thought of that. I’ll do that from now on!”

“You got it in one,” Sharon admitted.

“You don’t need any more padding,” I said sotto voce.

Your Fourth Literary Gift Concludes

Finishing with this teaser from Paranormal Privateers I’ve entitled ‘Rescue’.

Your Fourth Literary Gift
Andy Zach Fans — Silverback gorilla and blonde from Paaranormal Privateers

We entered the saucer. Standing at the saucer control panel, wearing a pink ruffled shirt, purple bow tie, and a black tuxedo, was a middle-aged man with a salt-and-pepper pompadour. He held an Xbox controller, obviously modded. I smelled the scent of hair pomade.

“At ease, Sir Lancelot,” he said, and the gorilla slumped to the floor as he pushed a button.

“You’re the controller?” Diane said, surprised as I’d ever heard her.

“That’s me, and your rescuer. Before the inevitable interview, let’s get moving.” He pushed the button labeled Rome, Italy. “Rome is where I have further transportation set up. I’m sure the aliens will bounce back from a little power outage faster than we expect.”

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Quizzes, Questions — Try out my audiobook.

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Subscribe to my newsletter above to see all my blog posts. Or you can just stay at my blog, checking back every day until Christmas.

Posted on December 3, 2022December 4, 2022 by admin — 5 Comments

Your Third Literary Gift! – 22 Gifts Until Christmas

Here is Your Third Literary Gift on our journey to Christmas day, from me, Andy Zach. Every day in December, from the first to the twenty-fifth I will give you a piece of my writing every day.

My past gifts are: 25 Days to Christmas – 25 Literary Gifts for You and Your Second Literary Gift! – 24 Gifts to Christmas.

Your Third Literary Gift is below!

From my book My Undead Mother-in-law, enjoy this section from chapter three.

Chapter 2 – West Peoria

Your Third Literary Gift
My Undead Mother-in-law Audiobook — My Undead Mother-in-law Chapter 2 icon

As soon as he hung up, Sam’s cell phone rang. Noting it was Lisa, he said, “Hi, sweetheart!”

“No time for that romantic crap. We’ve got another zombie turkey outbreak!”

“Where?”

“Not far from you. It’s a small private turkey farm near Gary, Deviled Turkeys. I’ve sent you the address.”

“Odd name.”

“They’re bedeviling the family, who’s surrounded. They called our turkey hotline. I’ve already notified the local authorities and the Indiana National Guard. Get the story, Sam! We’re dying for news here. I may have to cut our staff back again.”

“You’ve got a hot story in your in-basket from Gary already, about the zombie family. I’ve got Dr. Galloway getting DNA samples from them.”

“Great! You always pick me up, Sam.”

“You’re turning into a mushball.”

“You have that effect on me. Now, hurry up and get going!” She hung up.

“Bye, Lisa.” One tradition hadn’t changed since their marriage. She still hung up abruptly, leaving Sam talking into a dead phone.

Travel Interlude

Your Third Literary Gift
Back cover of My Undead Mother-in-law — My Most Romantic Story

Sam arrived at the Deviled Turkeys farm in the dark winter evening. Sam could see the National Guard trucks and a couple of police cars along the snowy drive to the barnyard. They had distracted the flock of perhaps a thousand turkeys from attacking the house and were now barely holding their own position.

Sam heard the BANG of shotguns, and the pop, pop of rifles and pistols. Why did the police waste their time and ammunition? Those weapons proved ineffective against the zombie turkeys last November.

Grabbing his trusty Flaming Turkey brand flamethrower from the backseat, he approached the line of soldiers.

“Stay away, mister!” an officer yelled over the crackle of gunfire.

Sam noticed he had a skinny neck and a shock of red hair.

“You should have a flamethrower!” Sam yelled back.

“We do! We can’t use them this close to the buildings. There’s a family in there!”

Good thing Lisa isn’t here, Sam thought. During the zombie turkey apocalypse, she’d flamed first and asked questions later.

Another car pulled up in the drive. The officer yelled, “Get away, ma’am! This is a dangerous situation!”

“I’ve come to reason with the turkeys,” Diane Newby yelled back, her red eyes gleaming.

“You can’t reason with crazed killer turkeys!”

“You watch me!” She leapt past the officer, past the line of soldiers, directly toward the mass of turkeys. The soldiers ceased firing, for fear of hitting her. The mass of turkeys washed over Diane like a tsunami. Sam reluctantly filmed her last moments, for her family’s sake.

Dramatic Pause before Your Third Literary Gift Concludes

Your Third Literary Gift
Happy Thanksgiving — Zombie Turkeys on the loose. From the back cover of Zombie Turkeys

The mound of turkeys burst apart, revealing Diane throttling a tom. She ripped off its head, legs, and wings and then smashed the body into paste on the ground.

“Listen up, you turkeys!” she yelled. “I’m the boss turkey now! Follow me!” Obediently, the turkeys followed her into the barn. She led them back into their cages and shut them in. Where the turkeys had burst doors and wire fencing, using her bare hands Diane wove the tough steel wire into a tight net, holding them securely. “Good thing I’m handy with macramé,” she said to herself as she wove.

Diane’s clothing was shredded and bloody like she’d been through a wood chipper, but her skin showed pink and unbroken through the many holes in her pants and coat. Sam ran to her.

“Are you OK, Diane?”

“Never felt better! I told you I could reason with the zombie turkeys!”

“How did you find out?”

“It was on the zombie turkey Twitter feed on the Midley Beacon page, where I was reading your story about us!”

“Ma’am, I have to thank you for saving us from a difficult situation,” the officer said. “I’m Sergeant Coxcomb.”

“How appropriate,” Sam murmured. Louder, he said, “I’m Sam Melvin, investigative reporter for the Midley Beacon.”

Smiling broadly, Diane said, “I’m Diane New—er—Sydney. I came here as soon as I heard of the attack. I just knew I could control the zombie turkeys. They’re quite easy, compared to children!” She laughed.

Sam Gets the Story

“Diane, I filmed your battle. Do I have your permission to broadcast it?”

“By all means! Be sure to say a zombie human came to the rescue! Just call me anytime you have a zombie animal outbreak!”

“Will do!”

“I’ll testify to that!” Sergeant Coxcomb said.

“OK, let me interview you then, Sergeant, and I’ll add your testimony.”

The interviews with Sergeant Coxcomb and Diane, combined with the thrilling video of human zombie versus turkey zombies, burst across the internet like a nuclear bomb. Once again, the Midley Beacon plowed new ground in the zombie news business.

Tell me what you think of Your Third Literary Gift

So what’s the verdict? Give me your opinion on my contact page here. Or you can send me an email here: [email protected]. Finally, you can contact me through my newsletter by clicking here. and I’ll give you a free copy of Zombie Turkeys! I give away free copies of my books. Each of the next 22 days of gifts will be in the newsletter.

Your Third Literary Gift
July Joy My Undead Mother-in-law — Review of My Undead Mother-in-law

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Or you can just stay at my blog, checking back every day until Christmas.

Posted on December 2, 2022December 2, 2022 by admin — 17 Comments

Your Second Literary Gift! – 24 Gifts to Christmas

Your Second Literary Gift from me, author Andy Zach is in this blog post. I gave you your first gift in yesterday’s post, 25 Days to Christmas – 25 Literary Gifts for You. Let’s keep going!

From my book Zombie Detective, you get this section from the first chapter.

Chapter 1 – Laid Off

Sam Melvin, Zombie Detective

“Sam, you’re fired.” Lisa’s green eyes met Sam’s brown ones.

“What? Lisa, you and I have worked together at the Midley Beacon for ten years! And we’ve known each other for fifteen! And we’ve been married almost two months!” Sam broke eye contact, stood up from his desk, and paced about their small office.

“Sorry, Sam. Romance has to take a backseat to finances. Ever since the bottom dropped out of the zombie turkey news market since the first of the year, the Midley Beacon hasn’t made enough to pay your salary.”

“But that’s our salary. We share and share alike.”

“We can still live on my salary. And you can apply for unemployment now that you’re fired.”

“But what’ll I do all day? I can only play Fortnite for so long.”

“What did you do before I hired you ten years ago? What did you do while I was in college?”

“Uh, mow lawns. Handyman repair. Stuff like that. But I’m a grown man now. I want more.”

“Hmm, you are a decent reporter.”

“Thanks, Lisa. That’s high praise coming from you.”

“Well, it’s the truth. You’ve grown from a crappy reporter, like ninety-nine percent of all reporters, to well above average. I did lay off everyone else on the staff before you, you know.”

Sam’s eyes misted. “Aw, you’re making me feel warm and mushy.”

Your Second Literary Gift – a Mushy Scene

Lisa Melvin from Zombie Detective

“That’s part of good management—emotional manipulation.”

“Uh, you mean you don’t mean it?”

“Nah, I mean it. Emotional manipulation is much more effective if you’re sincere. Say, why don’t you call Andy Zach and see if he has some royalties to share. We signed a contract with him to get half the royalties from his book Zombie Turkeys. We supplied more than half his source material right from the pages of the Midley Beacon.”

Sam shook his head. “I just called him yesterday. His sales haven’t paid for the cover yet, let alone the editing.”

“I told him to go with traditional publishing!” Lisa scowled.

“He’d still be trying to get an agent, let alone publishing his book. Who wants to represent a zombie turkey author?”

“So think of something to do with your reporting and investigative skills. That’s your first job. Get out of here and work on it at home. When I come home tonight, I want a decision from you. That’s a deadline.”

“Ok, Lisa. And thanks. You know I work best under a deadline.”

“Sure, dear. We’ll go out for dinner tonight to celebrate your new career, whatever it will be.”

“I’m kind of tired of McDonald’s.”

“We’ll spurge. We’ll go to the big city of Peoria. Maybe to the Country Time Buffet.”

“Wow. Thanks, Lisa.”

“Now, shoo!” Lisa pushed her hands toward him. “Don’t forget to clear out your desk.”

Your Second Literary Gift – Continued

Your Second Literary Gift
New Science Books — Andy Zach’s new scifi detective mystery.

Like most of my books, Zombie Detective is available on Audible. Enjoy a free sample by clicking here!

Tell me what you think of Your Second Literary Gift

If you have any feedback for me, leave it on my contact page here. Or you can send me an email here: [email protected]. Finally, you can contact me through my newsletter by clicking here. I give away free copies of my books. Each of the next 23 days will be in the newsletter.

Literary Gifts
2021 Reviews Zombie Turkeys Audible — Audiobook cover – click to listen.

Tell me and I’ll give you a free copy of Zombie Turkeys!

Are you curious to listen to the audiobook? Click here to listen to a sample.

Or you can just stay at my blog, checking back every day until Christmas.

Posted on November 29, 2022November 29, 2022 by admin — 1 Comment

Cover Reveal for My New Book!

Cover Reveal for my new nook, Secret Supers in Space. This is it, friends. The cover is just below.

This is the third book in my Secret Supers series. You don’t have to read them in any particular order.

Cover Reveal
Interesting Links — Secret Supers – click for free audiobook.

Get your autographed copy here!

Cover Reveal
Villain's Vacation cover — Villain’s Vacation cover Click to listen.

Four disabled seventh graders with superpowers take a vacation at Coaster World. They need a break from fighting criminals. Ever since the beginning of the school year when they acquired their unusual abilities, they’ve been training and using those powers to fight crime in their town.

Little do they know, the arch-villain they recently defeated also loves coasters and is vacationing at Coaster World. Worse, the villain wants revenge. Nothing less than turning these teens to a life of crime will satisfy.

Can Jeremy, Dan, Kayla, and Aubrey withstand the villain’s attacks? Or will they become Super Villains?

You can only find out by listening to Villain’s Vacation.

Get your autographed copy here!

Cover Reveal – The New Book

The Secret Supers are bored out of their minds during summer vacation–until they go to Space Camp. They learn all about the space program, try out moon gravity and zero-g simulations, and practice docking with the International Space Station.

But that’s the easy part. The villains they defeated in the past are back with a diabolical plot that renders the middle schoolers’ superpowers ineffective.

Jeremy, Aubrey, Dan, and Kayla face the biggest challenge of their lives. Even if they escape the villains’ clutches, will they survive?

Pre-order this book by clicking here.

So, what do you think? Love it? Or not? Let me know either way and I’ll give you a free book!

How Would You Like A Free Copy?

Of course, you would! Just follow this easy step: Subscribe to my newsletter here.

You see, I give free books to my newsletter subscribers–including you.

My next newsletter goes our December 4th. That’s when I’ll offer this free coper

Posted on November 4, 2022November 4, 2022 by admin

Explosive Book Sales during 2020 COVID – How?

Explosive Book Sales during 2020 – How? In this blog post, I show you the actions I took in 2020 and how they led to more than doubling my sales.

Here’s the fourth video I made from my Youtube channel. Subscribe if you dare!

Explosive Book Sales During Year 2020

In case you forgot or didn’t read my last post, After My First Book, I Got Exponential Growth – How? let’s review my 2019 sales growth, over 100%.

I won’t leave you in suspense: here are the 2020 results.

During 2020 I went from 359 to 859 books sold! What in the world happened in 2020? Let’s review the year:

During January – New Audiobook and Explosive Growth

I published the audiobook version of my disabled 7th-grade superhero book:

Best Science Stories or Science Fiction More Good Things Best Book Reviews
Explosive Book Sales — Click to listen to free sample of Secret Supers.

The audiobook proved to be so popular, I gave away over 100 review copies and used up my free audiobook codes. Don’t worry; you can still get it for free by joining Audible here.

I also began pushing all my other audiobooks. That led to many sales through the review codes I get from Audible. I get the codes for free and then Audible pays me when someone redeems them for free.

I still have a lot of audiobook codes. Get yours here.

Explosive Book Sales during March

Take a look at what happened in March.

Month Book Sales

The green color means the monthly sales are above average for my six years of book sales.

What’s going on? Take a look at my audiobook sales:

That’s 337 more audiobooks sold than in 2019! That’s half of the 139% growth. Where did the rest come from? Let’s look at ebooks.

There are another 148 ebook sales, mostly from Zombie Turkeys. Also, the rest of the Life After Life Chronicles all increased from the previous year. Then there are the sales from my two new books.

My Zombie Turkey ebook was priced at .99 and the price reduction led to new sales during 2020. Also, I changed my Amazon ad campaigns to focus on categories, not keywords. That led to me online sales than ever before.

Explosive Book Sales – Two New Books Released during 2020

latest science news What's New Science
Explosive Book Sales — Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse

Villain's Vacation cover
Explosive Book Sales — Villain’s Vacation

During 2020 I released Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse on January 2, 2020 and Villain’s Vacation on August 27, 2020.

I now had a short story collection. I gave away free short stories to promote it. The book also promoted the rest of my series.

Also, I now had two books in my Secret Supers series. The sales of one book led to the sales of the other.

Two books, each in two formats, plus the new audiobook, gave me five new items to sell.

My fifth video:

Book Conventions

I had the following conventions in 2020:

Convention	Date	Books Sold
Washington HS	1/9/2020	3
PeoriaCon	3/7/2020	17
QuadCon	8/29/2020	9
Total		29

That didn’t seem to be the source of new sales! How about print sales during 2020?

I only sold 15 more print books than 2019, probably since I only had three book conventions, compared with seven the year before

During 2021 Book Sales were up and down

I went back to book conventions. I ended up selling fewer books (731) but making more profit. I sold more of the profitable print books, but not as many ebooks.

I attribute this to the end of the lockdowns during 2021 and being able to attend more conventions. I also introduced my Square Site where I sell my autographed books, just like I do at conventions. Click here to get your autographed book now.

Get Your Free Book With Your prediction for 2022 Total Sales

How many books do you think I’ll sell during 2022? I’m at 561 so far, but I have four book events coming up. Tell me by clicking here and the closest person will get their choice of books from me in January 2023. Or you can email me at [email protected].

Get all my posts through my newsletter. Also, get free books by clicking here.

Here are the previous posts in this series:

My Sixth-Year Anniversary as a Self-Published Author

What Happened After My First Book Was Published?

Let’s close with my sixth video:

Posted on October 27, 2022November 14, 2022 by admin — 2 Comments

After My First Book, I Got Exponential Growth – How?

After My First Book, I Got Exponential Growth – How? Today I’ll show you how random marketing efforts and some luck led to more than tenfold sales growth.

I forget to tell you about starting my Youtube channel. I haven’t gotten much traffic, but the videos cost me $500 to produce. Here’s the first one, from November 2016

Exponential Growth – Year 2018

Following Zombie Turkeys conversion to an audiobook, I published My Undead Mother-in-law as an audiobook.

July Joy My Undead Mother-in-law
Exponential Growth — Reviews of My Undead Mother-in-law

May

My book Paranormal Privateers was published in ebook and paperback formats. This book had two covers. My first one is here:

The intent was to show a woman’s torso in a wetsuit with a bloody bullet how. This was the Undead Mother-in-Law in the first chapter. After a lack of sales, I switched it to this:

I was excited because now I had a trilogy! Throughout the year, I’d see multiple books sold in person and online. Few things feel better than having a person buy three of your books at a time.

Not that the story ended in Paranormal Privateers. I left it open for more books.

SciFi Fuel Paranormal Privateers
Exponential Growth — The cover of my third novel Paranormal Privateers. Click to get yours.

This book cover sold better.

Events:

Book launch at I Know You Like A Book on May 19th where I sold 4.

I began using Mailchimp for my newsletter. I had built my list to over one thousand and it was quite unwieldy mailing this through Yahoo! By the end of the year, using newsletter-building ads, I grew to over 1,600 subscribers.

You can join my mailing list AND get FREE audiobooks by clicking here.

Charitable Book Sale at ‘Books to Benefit’ on July 7th where I sold three books, one of each.

PennedCon in St. Louis on September 21-22nd, where I sold ten books and made contacts with many authors. I got reviews and contacts and most importantly, ideas for marketing.

Book Nook Bookstore, where I sold three books on October 27th.

First Friday, an arts promotion in Peoria every first Friday of the month. At Wheel Art, I sold four books on November 2nd.

The next day I sold six books at the Peoria Library Author Fair.

Chambanacon in Bloomington – I sold thirteen books, my best convention ever.

Also in November I reduced my Zombie Turkeys ebook to .99. The idea was to sell the first and get people to buy the second and third books too.

I finished the year with 173 sales, a 107% increase of cumulative sales over 2017, which in turn had a 73% increase over 2016. The green areas in the table below indicate increases over the previous year.

It turned out I was just getting started.

Quick question

How much do you think I’ll sell this year, 2022? I’m at 561 so far, but I have four book events coming up. Tell me by clicking here and the closest person will get their choice of books from me in January 2023. Or you can email me at [email protected].

Here’s my second video:

Andy Zach reads from Zombie Turkeys Chapter 1 – Bartonville

Exponential Growth in 2019

Interesting Links
Exponential Growth — Secret Supers – click get yours

I was tired of writing zombie books. I decided to pursue the middle-school readership with a superhero book. So I wrote Secret Supers and published it on March 29, 2019. It’s all about four disabled seventh-graders who get superpowers. I got the idea from my own daughter who has cerebral palsy and wanted a flying wheelchair. I got a flying wheelchair and car in here!

Paranormal Privateers audiobook came out in January as well. I had nine products: three books in three formats, soon to be twelve products with Secret Supers.

Events:

At the first ever PeoriaCon in March 2019, I sold 24 books, a new record for me. I also used my new Square credit card reader for the first time.

In April, I sold my books at the Peoria Mall for two days and sold eleven. Later that month, I sold another 24 books at Quadcon in Peoria. Wow!

In May, I went to the Springfield ComicCon and only sold 2 books. It was purely a comics room–except for my books. Later I went to the Midwest ComicCon and sold three books.

Appropriately, I went to the Tremont Turkey Festival in June and sold 21 books. Later that month I went to the Book Nook in Washington and sold one book. Oops! I also sold one at the East Peoria vendor fair. Not every event is a home run. Finally, I closed the month at Geekfest and sold five books.

In September I had an author signing at I Know You Like a Book and sold seven books.

I went to Archon near St. Louis in October and sold twelve books. That barely covered my table costs and the gas. Quadcon came bad to Peoria in late October and I sold nine books.

In November I realized I can give my audiobook promotion codes to my newsletter readers and I’d get paid for them. This led to 18 audiobook sales and reviews.

Later in the month, I sold 12 of my books at the Washington High School Star Wars event.

Finally, after Thanksgiving, I sold twelve more books at Chambanacon 2019.

What Happened in December 2019 and the Secret of Exponential Growth

That was it for book events, but in December 2019 I sold 55 books through Amazon and Audible. Exponential growth was happening!

As you can see from the graph below, my sales increased 108% over 2018, more than double. That is 356 books sold versus 171 the previous year.

The circle size represents the percent increase (or decrease) from the previous year.

So, why were my sales growing? I thought of these reasons:

The more books I write, the more books I sell. Seems obvious, right? But now I saw how books would sell each other.
The more formats I have, the more I sell. I publish each book in print, ebook, and audiobook. The audiobook promotions with Audible allowed me to give away free books and get paid for them.
The more events I attended, the more I sold. Again, it’s obvious.

From these conclusions, I decided to promote my audiobooks even more, attend even more events, and write even faster.

What happened next? Sorry to spoil the surprise, but 2020 turned out to be even better. I’ll put that in my next blog post. Get all my posts through my newsletter. Click here.

Here are the previous posts in this series:

My Sixth-Year Anniversary as a Self-Published Author

What Happened After My First Book Was Published?

Let’s close with my third video:

Andy Zach reads Chapter 3 – Princeville

Posted on October 20, 2022October 20, 2022 by admin — 2 Comments

What Happened After My First Book Was Published?

What Happened After My First Book Was Published? Learn what I learned through six years of writing and publishing. I’ll cover my failures and successes, and what led to an exponential growth of sales and revenues.

The First Year 2016

My book Zombie Turkeys was published in ebook and paperback formats.

Oddly, Kindle did not accept my paperback cover. It was “too bloody”. I had to change the colors. So I have these two covers:

Best Science Stories Zombie Turkeys Gift
What Happened After — Get your Zombie Turkeys here. You get a bushel of laughter with each book.

Events: 1. Book launch at the Peoria North Library on October 31st. I had about 20 people and sold 5 books. Combined with 5 presales and I had ten in October.

2. Wheel Art First Friday – My wife made pottery here and I set up a table to sell books with their permission. I sold 4 books.

3. Peoria Library Author Fair – Sold 1, but I also made some author friends

4. Chambanacon in Bloomington – My first book fair. I sold 5 books. I made more author friends.

5. I started my newsletter in November, using addresses I picked up from my events.

Year total: 28 books, 27 paperback, 1 ebook.

Got questions? Ask me.

What Happened After 2016? 2017 happenings

I started writing another book in November 2016, My Undead Mother-in-law. It came out in August 2017.

Zombie Turkeys Thanksgiving
What Happened After — My Undead Mother-in-law front cover. Click to get

Events: 1. I Know You Like A Book author signing. I sold 6 books.

2. Lit-on-Fire bookstore author reading and some sales.

3. I joined two author groups and sold some books to other authors.

4. I went to Her Majesty’s Tea Room and sold 4 books.

5. I sold 3 books at the Book Nook.

6. I sold some books to Barnes and Noble.

7. My Undead Mother-in-law launched at Barnes & Noble and I sold 1. I also appeared on TV here in Peoria.

8. I went back to Chambanacon and sold 8 books, 5 ZTs and 3 MUMs.

9. I published an audiobook version of Zombie Turkeys on 11/1/2017. You can get it for free by clicking here. I sold one later that year.

Zombie Turkeys Laughter 2021 Reviews
What Happened After — Zombie Turkeys audiobook cover. Click to get!

Final results for 2017: 96 Zombie Turkeys sold and 37 My Undead Mother-in-law.

This post is long enough. Let me show you my sales chart to date and I’ll write another blog post soon. Notice my sales have increased every year except 2021. I sold so many in 2020, that my number of sales declined. 2022 isn’t over, but I expect to pass both 2020 and 2021.

The circle size represents the percent increase (or decrease) from the previous year.

Posted on October 13, 2022October 13, 2022 by admin

My Second Draft – What I Never Imagined

My Second Draft – What I Never Imagined – Here is my second installment of this series in real-time. I just finished my second draft and sent it to my editor. I’ll have the third installment in the future. Be sure to read the first post on my first draft here. Click here.

As always, you can get free books from me by clicking here.

Also, if you ever want to contact me, to comment or ask me something, click here.

So, what shocked my socks off about this second draft?

By the way, this book is the third in my Secret Supers series. It covers the adventures of four disabled middle schoolers who become superheroes. Here’s the first book:

Interesting Links
My Second Draft — *Secret Supers* – click for free audiobook.

My Second Draft – My First Surprise

I finished my first draft last week and contacted my editor. She informed me that she has a six-week lead time. I didn’t know that. Oops!

Why is this a problem? I wanted the book completed by November 14th and the Christmas shopping season. I ASSumed she had a four-week lead time. My error.

My second error is that I promised it to her by Columbus Day October 10th and didn’t get it to her until today. That’s a double oops. So my publishing timeline is probably shot.

You see, when you’re a self-published author like me, you’re responsible to keep yourself on schedule and meet deadlines–or your sales suffer.

But why was I late? I have multiple excuses, but basically, it’s poor planning.

Villain's Vacation cover What is it like?
My Second Draft — My second novel in the series, *Villain’s Vacation*. Click for a free copy

My Second Surprise in My Second Draft

Remember I mentioned being self-published? That means I contact and contract with an illustrator for each of my books. Fortunately, I’ve found a great illustrator, Sean “Fuzzy” Flanagan. I contacted him the same day as my editor about doing a cover illustration. He had the time to do it in October. Hurray!

We met yesterday via Zoom and Facebook conference and brainstormed a good cover we both loved. We also brainstormed the chapter icons. I love them! All my books have them. Here’s a sample:

What Do Readers Think
My Second Draft — Chapter 1 icon of Villain’s Vacation. Click to get a copy

So what’s the problem? The cover we both wanted depicted a scene I hadn’t written. It was in the back of my mind for the whole book. So I spent yesterday afternoon writing it. But that was one reason I didn’t get my book to my editor yesterday.

The Other Reason I was Late

Just adding a new scene isn’t enough. With every second draft, after I clear off all the Grammarly errors and made all my points of view correct, I read the whole book aloud.

It’s amazing what you discover when you do that with a book you’ve just written. I find inconsistencies in point of view. I find awkward sentences. And I discover plot inconsistencies.

I read really fast and I don’t read every word–unless I read it aloud.

One last pitch: find out when my new book comes out through my newsletter. Subscribe here.

Posted on September 29, 2022September 29, 2022 by admin — 1 Comment

Best of September’s Internet for You

Best of September’s Internet for You, curated by me, author Andy Zach. Find out what amazing news, discoveries, insights, and fun you’ve missed this month.

I’ve spent the month writing my ninth book and cruising the internet researching the Everglades, the coast of Florida, and the Dragon space capsule procedures. What’s new with you? Let me know, and I’ll send you a free book. Click here.

Or don’t. You can also get my books* for free here, by subscribing to my newsletter.

*My books: Zombie Turkeys, Zombie Detective, My Undead Mother-in-law, Paranormal Privateers, Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse, Secret Supers, and Villain’s Vacation. Click on each title to find out more and to get your copy in ebook, paperback, or audiobook.

Let’s begin the discovery of September’s Internet!

Yup, this shark would look fine on a cover of a 50s SciFi magazine.

Speaking of science fiction covers, this picture from the James Webb Space Telescope (JWST) would be great as a cover:

For comparison, here’s a picture from the Voyager spacecraft as it flew by in 1989:

How About Some Videos from September’s Internet?

Would you like a flying bicycle/motorcycle?

In many predictions from the 50s, we were supposed to have flying cars by now. How about flying motorcycles? Is this for you?

Let’s take a break from SciFi and go to fantasy.

Legolas’ life and travels

Did you learn anything about Legolas from this video? Let me know.

September’s Internet – Some Humor

Back to Science Fiction–from 200 BC

The Antikythera mechanism is an example of Greek technical prowess as early as 300-200 BC. A good alternate history scifi would be for them to begin an industrial revolution at that time.

And speaking of the industrial revolution, the Brooklyn Bridge was built at that time in the US, chiefly managed by Roebling’s wife, after his death. The technology of the 19th century inspires steampunk SciFi.

September’s Writing Prompt

I belong to a writers’ group. Here was the writing prompt we got:

He sat and waited. He’d been doing that for some time. Three million four hundred, fifty one thousand, and sixty one years, one hundred ninety one days, five hours, and thirty five minutes, according to his internal clock, accurate to five microseconds per millennium.

As usual, he absorbed all information he could from his surroundings. Crickets chirred. He recognized each within microphone range by their variations in timbre and frequency. Then there were the electromagnetic impulses flooding his various antennae. He’d identified thirteen distinct civilizations on this planet. Most of them were quite recent.

But no activation signal.

Wait! There it was. Now he could act.
This is what Andy Zach wrote in five minutes.

Posted on September 13, 2022September 13, 2022 by admin

Fantasy Fuel! What Inspires Fantasy?

Fantasy Fuel! What is it? It’s those books, articles, pictures, and videos that spark the creativity that leads to fantasy stories. Let’s start with this one:

There are a LOT of castles in Europe–and there are more in Asia and Africa. Castles lend themselves to fantasy settings. I’ve dreamed of living in one and defending one from attack.

Which of the castles in this article is your favorite? Tell me and I’ll send you a free book. Just click here.

Fantasy Fuel – How about fantastic creatures?

Squashmingos! They remind me of the flamingos used by Alice in Alice in Wonderland. In case you’re not familiar with the reference, here is one of the original illustrations by Tenniel:

Fantasy Fuel
Alice playing croquet with a flamingo. — Alice in Wonderland Illustration by Sir John Tenniel (28 February 1820 aa 25 February 1914)
19th Century Illustration

Here’s a snippet of the Disney movie:

I haven’t written a fantasy yet, but I have made up an imaginary, alien animal: the foxcat.

The alien foxcat. Click to get the book.

It’s called a ‘foxcat’ because it’s a combination of a fennec fox and a caterpillar. A foxcat is a marsupial amphibian. It’s a stowaway on a gigantic flying saucer in my book:

SciFi Fuel Paranormal Privateers
Fantasy Fuel — The cover of my third novel Paranormal Privateers. Click to get yours.

My science fiction sounds like fantasy. I wonder what my fantasy will sound like? I’ll have to write my first fantasy to find out. My working title is ‘Sentience’.

More Fantasy Fuel Coming Up for You

You can’t beat reading great fantasy books to inspire your fantasy writing. Here’s one I just finished.

Fantasy Fuel
The Fellowship of the Ring — My recent review

The Fellowship of the Ring (The Lord of the Rings, #1)
by J.R.R. Tolkien

it was amazing

bookshelves: fantasy, favorites

The greatest novel of the 20th century, a true 5 star book, one that’ll be read in another hundred years.

My latest re-read was in the single volume edition with Christopher Lee’s artwork. His art is detailed and complex, with hidden elements that tell the story.

In this re-read, I saw the close connection between the start of the book, which is often called dull, and the end of the Hobbit. One dovetails into the other. The hobbit background is necessary for those who didn’t read the Hobbit, and provides additional detail on them, including their three races: the Stoors, the Harfoots, and the Fallowhides.

I also noticed in my re-read the masterful way Tolkien built tension and prolongs conflict and threats. He also increases the risks and dangers throughout the book. These details jump out at me more since I became an author.
Andy Zach‘s review

Yet More Fuel for Your Fantasy Writing

Why not use cartoons?

So, if you have a writer’s block, just get it off your desk!

How about some more fantastic architecture? Coming in from Kansas City we have the following:

Or how about we use some beautiful pictures of nature to inspire our writing?

Now, let’s try another cartoon.

Obviously, cartoons are my chief inspiration. I love talking animals.

I have a talking hamster in my Secret Supers books. Dancer taught himself how to read and type.

What Do Readers Think
Fantasy Fuel — Chapter 1 icon of Villain’s Vacation

Here’s a fantasy come true: free books. Enjoy these freebies from me. I give them to all my subscribers. Click here to get your books.

Posted on September 4, 2022September 4, 2022 by admin

Science Stories That Fuel Science Fiction

Science Stories That Fuel Science Fiction – Let me give you my ideas for fiction from recent scientific breakthroughs. Then you can tell me your ideas–and get free books for them.

Ready? Let’s go!

Here’s a great new image of Jupiter, taken with the James Webb Space Telescope (JWST for short). How would I use this for fiction?

Imagine the infrared light revealing cities or satellites around the planet, inhabited by aliens. This would lead to a great story. What would you do? Let me know, and I’ll send you a free book. Just click here.

If you can’t think of anything to say, just click and join my newsletter and you’ll get free audiobooks.

This’d make a great cover for that book or short story:

What’s Next in Science Stories?

How about this story?

Here we have a string of satellites visible from earth. I remember when Telstar was visible and used to relay signals from Japan to the US during the 1964 Olympics. I was 8 then.

How would I write this as a sci-fi story? One idea is to increase the size of human space structures until they’re as bright as the moon. What kind of space stations would they be? How would we use them? What would be the side effects, the social implications? This is a rich area of story fuel.

Let me know your ideas. Again, you get a free book for contributing.

More Story Fuel Coming Up!

I already have a zombie turkey apocalypse series. How about a squirrel apocalypse?

This tickles my funny bone: squirrels causing the downfall of civilization. I can think of dozens of scenarios, including leveraging my zombie world that begins below:

Best Science Stories Zombie Turkeys Gift
Science Stories — Get your Zombie Turkeys here. You get a bushel of laughter with each book.

How would you handle this? Get your book now, right here. You can also email me at [email protected] or you can write a comment on this blog.

Why do I give books away? Ideas are the most important resource a writer can have. Who knows if your idea will give me a great novel?

Posted on August 30, 2022August 30, 2022 by admin

August Memes and Reviews for You

August Memes and Reviews for You, curated by me, Andy Zach. Let’s start with some memes:

How would you like another? Here you go!

With my current work-in-process, Secret Supers in Space, I feel like I have that block on my desk every other day. I’ve been writing it in fits and starts. It’s the third book in my Secret Supers series, starting with:

4.0 out of 5 stars

A fun story!

Reviewed in the United States on May 16, 2022

Jeremy has cerebral palsy and uses a wheelchair to get around. He is in a special education class with Dan, who is blind, Kayla, who was mute and used a walker, and Audrey, who lost her legs and uses crutches. One afternoon, when conducting experiments in his laboratory, Jeremy accidentally gives himself superpowers. Specifically, he gains the ability of telekinesis, which he can use to help himself walk, cause his wheelchair to travel at much higher speeds, and even fly. Not wanting to keep this discovery to himself, Jeremy tells his 3 friends about it and gives each of them superpowers as well. But now that they have superpowers, what should they do? Following the words of Uncle Ben of Spiderman, they decide they must use their powers for good, beginning by trying to solve a case of a stolen car, and keep their identities a secret, modeling their costumes on the Incredibles.

This book was a fun story that placed individuals with disabilities front and center in the story. While the superpowers allow them to do things they wouldn’t have been able to do otherwise, it is what they choose to do with their powers that makes all the difference. Also, even with their superpowers, their initial disabilities aren’t erased, which I think is important. I liked to development of the characters and how they interacted and supported each other; I only wish the book had been longer so I could have spent more time with them. I am glad that there’s a sequel already published, and I look forward to reading/listening to it.

Jennifer C.

August Memes – and now you get reviews

Aside from writing, I also read books. Let me give you some recent reviews I’ve written.

Review of	Save the Dragons (Kindle Edition)
Rating	4 of 5 stars
Shelves	fantasy, humor, read
Format	Kindle Edition edit
Status	August 27, 2022 – Finished Reading
Review	As usual, Dave Freer’s book is a romp in madness. We start off with an improbable hero, Squigs, six foot ten, and ectomorphic. He’s a university student in alchemy who’s on the run from people who want him dead and who just blew off his hand. So naturally, he jumps into another universe, through a portal predicted by his laptop computer. The new world is swamp and ocean where he’s saved from death by a huge man and his beautiful daughter, who hates him. She’s destined to marry a hero from a royal family, so she has no time for a clumsy, awkward suitor. They include him on a mission to save the rapidly poached dragons of their world. Secret societies, demons, and body-selling vampires enter the story, as well as a blood-thirsty dwarf and a spectral parrot. Hang on for the ride and enjoy the story.

Is there another book you want me to read and review? Let me know and I’ll try and read and review it for you.

How About Another Meme and Review?

Villain's Vacation cover What is it like?
August Memes — Villain’s Vacation – click to get

rated it really liked it

Hamster Vs. Super Villain

My 12 year old read this one too and really liked it a lot better then the first book. It could stand on it’s own but will flow better if you read the first one before this book. This story has a great flow and plot that will definitely keep you engaged. Turns out that the hamster did change with the electromagnetic exposure…. The tweens go to Coaster World for a much needed break from their superhero duties when it gets interrupted by a villain. The tweens must work together again and reach out for help. It’s a great read for the younger elementary to adult reader.
Paula Dyches

Let’s Close by Giving You Free Books

“What? Why do I get free books?”

Because you read this far. Just click here and get free audio and ebooks from me through my newsletter.

My most recent review:

Review of	War Priest 3: A Summer’s Snow (Kindle Edition)
Rating	4 of 5 stars
Shelves	action-adventure, fantasy, read
Format	Kindle Edition
Status	August 29, 2022 – Finished Reading
Review	Author Harmon Cooper continues his series of Arik, the steadily improving War Priest. Having great control of healing magic (revivura) and developed some control of illusion magic (chimuchura), he is also learning warrior magic (thunderura) and the magic under them all, Yokaura. It’s a good thing he’s learning because he wants to get revenge on the current dictator Nobunaga who killed his family and friends and has his sister hostage. Along the way, he has to complete dozens of side quests to help friends and achieve goals. Highly entertaining. I think this was my favorite so far

Posted on August 19, 2022August 19, 2022 by admin

Your Best SciFi Reviews from August

Your Best SciFi Reviews from August – I’ve been reading all month and here are my favorite SciFi reviews so far.

Worlds
by Eric Flint

Aug 10, 2022 ·

really liked it

bookshelves: fantasy, science-fiction, alternate-history, military-scifi

Eric Flint has a delightful collection of his shorter fiction in this book. He has novella-sized works from the Bellisarius series, the 1632 series, the Philosophical Stranger series. and the Rats, Vats, and Bats series. Each one shows his writing chops and quirky sense of humor.

Required for all Eric Flint fans.
Andy Zach‘s review

Have you read it? Have you read any of Eric Flint? Let me know and I’ll give you a free book. Click here.

What’s Next in Best SciFi Reviews?

Villain's Vacation cover
Best SciFi Reviews — Villain’s Vacation cover

it was amazing

· review of another edition

Shelves: action-adventure, animals, detective, crime, fantasy, fantasy-superheroes, middle-grades, mystery, owned, sequel-in-a-series

In this sequel to Secret Supers, Jeremy has been experimenting on his hamster. As a result, Dancer has learned how to read, and is reading everything he can to learn about the human world. When Jeremy discovers this, he gets Dancer one of his old cell phones so Dancer can text the group.

As for the superhero business, the group needs some downtime and goes on vacation to Coaster World. What they don’t realize is that the villain they defeated also loves roller coasters and wants revenge against the Secret Supers.

Will the Secret Supers be able to defeat the villain and enjoy their vacation, or are their crime-fighting days numbered?

This was a fun sequel to Secret Supers. Not only did we have Andy Zach as a character in the book, as though the events were true and actually happened, but I loved the inclusion of a Super-Hamster helping out Jeremy and his friends. In this battle against the villain, the Secret Supers struggle, as the villain seems to have figured out how to neutralize their powers, and they not only have to call in support but also reveal themselves to some non-Supers.

The action was well-paced throughout, and the mystery of the identity of the villain was well-done. While I had suspicions, I wasn’t sure before the reveal, which was nice. If you enjoyed Secret Supers, I feel confident that you will also enjoy Villain’s Vacation.

For this book, I listened to the audiobook, which was narrated by Michael Stafford. Stafford gave a wonderful performance, and I would certainly listen to this audiobook again. (less)
Jennifer rated it

You Have A Military SciFi Book Coming Up

Midshipman Henry Gallant in Space (The Henry Gallant Saga, #1)
by H. Peter Alesso (Goodreads Author)

Aug 01, 2022 ·

really liked it

bookshelves: military-scifi, science-fiction

Author Peter Alesso does a good job in his opening novel of this series. He portrays the troubles of being a normal human being in a time of genetic advancement. Then he details the technical training of a midshipman in the United Planets federation.

But there is an alien force lurking in the solar system. So far they have been benign. Will that continue?

Read and find out.
Andy Zach‘s review

Read On to Keep on Rolling out those Best SciFi Reviews

Lieutenant Henry Gallant (The Henry Gallant Saga, #2)
Rating	[ 4 of 5 stars ]
Shelves	action-adventure, military-scifi, read, romance, science-fiction
Format	Kindle Edition
Status	August 15, 2022
Review	Author Peter Alesso keeps his military scifi series going with the first interstellar exploration of humanity. Protagonist Henry Gallant is now a lieutenant reporting to Captain Neumann–a perfectionist and nitpicker. They arrive at Tau Ceti and are attacked by the Titans, the methane-breathing aliens they fought on Earth. They barely survive and must land to repair their ship. Then they discover a settlement on the Earthlike Elysium–a settlement of humans. How’d they get there? Who are they? And what will happen next? Surprises await you.

Still More Best SciFi Reviews for You

Paranormal Privateers (Life After Life Chronicles, #3)
by Andy Zach

Jul 01, 2022

it was amazing

This series is the first I have read of Andy Zach’s and I am glad I picked it up! The series continues with lots of action, characters continue to be developed, humor, and the zombies are still not mindless shells ambling around awaiting an axe to the head. Still a refreshing take on zombies as a whole.

I look forward to what Andy writes next!

Audio Version: Phil Blechman and Raven Perez do a great job with their respective characters and the overall narration.
Nemesis Reviews‘s review

I’m including this review because it’s on sale on 8/21/2022

Who can beat a book sale? Get your sale copy here, from August 21-28.

Your Best Books — Oops! cover. Click to get your signed copy

Oops!: Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse (Life After Life Chronicles Book 4)
by Andy Zach (Goodreads Author)

Jul 02, 2022

it was amazing

Andy Zach, Tori Smith and Olivia Smith continue to create a fun interesting world in the Life After Life Chronicles series. The characters are refreshing, the world continues to build, and the insanity increases. Hilarious and action packed. Audio Version: Michael Stafford does a great job with their respective characters and the overall narration.
Nemesis Reviews‘s review

Get my books for free through my newsletter. Click here now.

Note my first book will be FREE from August 21-28. Grab it!

Posted on August 16, 2022August 16, 2022 by admin

Get Your Free Short Stories Here

Greetings fans and anonymous internet readers! I’m author Andy Zach. I’ve decided to create one blog post to link to all my free short stories I’ve ever published. If you like them, you can get my collection of short stories below.

latest science news What's New Science
Get Your Free Short Stories — Oops! Click to get short stories

Accidents happen. Especially around zombie turkeys. Then you add zombie humans, and problems proliferate. Mix in some ill-planned genetic engineering, and things get crazy.

The insanity continues, from the story where zombies are merged with cucumbers to the one where two basement-dwelling nerds gain access to all video content from the past two hundred years—from aliens.

Andy Zach pulls out all the stops on his imagination as he serves up this smorgasbord of silliness. Try it. Laughter is good for your soul.
Oops! on Amazon

Do you already own Oops? Let me know and I’ll give you a free book! Just click here!

Get Your Free Short Stories – Start Right Here

The Life After Life Chronicles phoenix

A Phoenix Tale

by Andy Zach

I left the air-conditioned comfort of the taxi, and the sights, sounds, and smells of the old bazaar in Jeddah assailed me: a robe-clad man on camel plodded by, an adjacent fishmonger
added his smell to the fresh dung in the street, and the hawkers yelled their wares.

I could only speak Arabic at a middle school level, but as I strolled through the bazaar, I heard “Fresh dates!”…”Highest quality rugs!”…”Finest gold jewelry!”… “Ancient books! The
rarest in Saudi Arabia!”

My head snapped around. A bald, stumpy man in a white caftan saw me look and said, “Books? You want ancient books?”

“Yes.” I spoke carefully, knowing my poor accent. “Can you speak English?” I didn’t have much hope.

“Of course, my friend. Come into my shop.”
Read the rest here. Or click on the phoenix image above

This one will always have a special place in my heart. It was my first short story I ever wrote.

Your Next Free Short Story Follows Below

In a Pickle

by Andy Zach

Now, what was he going to do? His boss just told him to double the productivity of Vegan Inc’s pickle strain they used for their Kilwowski Pickle brand. That was completely impossible.
But keeping his job required it. He was the low man on the genetic engineering totem pole at Vegan Inc., the last one hired and the first one to be fired if another recession hit.

He couldn’t think. He couldn’t face this. So he cruised the internet.

“The origin of Zombie turkeys? I didn’t know they’d found that. Hmm, a Midley Beacon exclusive, the foremost zombie news source,” he read to himself.

Zombie turkeys had ravaged Illinois and the US at Thanksgiving. Thankfully they hadn’t hit near Terre Haute where he lived. He skimmed the article rapidly. Corn All, one of their agribusiness rivals, had genetically modified their corn to fight off corn disease. The genetic modification would adapt to the
disease at a cellular level, and neutralize it by copying the DNA from the disease organism, whether fungal or bacteria.

When wild turkeys ate the corn, it modified the E Coli in their gut, creating the zombie turkey bacteria, e coli gallopavo. That got into the turkeys’ bloodstream and made them zombies, able to regenerate any lost or damaged body part, even bringing turkeys back from the dead.

What caught his eye was the reproduction rate: zombie cells reproduced every twenty minutes. Could that work for pickles? Why not try?
Read the rest of In A Pickle here.

This was one of my favorite short stories to write. It is set soon after my novels Zombie Turkeys and Zombie Detective. The story icon is from my book Oops!.

Get Your Free Short Stories – The Third is the Best Yet

A Dying Business

by Andy Zach

He was dead. At least, his business was. And without his business, his wife would leave him and take their new baby. Then he might as well be dead.

His dad had run the Elysium Fields Mortuary for thirty years and had made a killing at it.

The first and only mortuary in their small town of Hillvale, everyone got buried there. He charged normal prices, he was friendly, and he helped their community. His dad said to him
when he was a teen, “Irving, after you get your college degree, go to mortuary school, and when you come out, I’ll hire you and then turn the business over to you. You’ll be set for life.”

Irv had no other plans. He liked this cute blonde Shelley in high school, and she liked him. So he learned the business, got his degree in psychological counseling, and came back and
married her. Just as he promised, his dad turned Elysium Fields over to him after a few years and retired to Florida with his mom.

The first years had been great. People were dying to be his customers. He and Shelley remodeled his parents’ old house, went on vacations around the world, had his and her luxury
cars. Shelley had their son, Nathan. Then the bottom dropped out of his business.

Rather than dying normally, people were taking zombie blood. Lung cancer? Gone. Heart disease? Cleared up. Severe accidents? Limbs grew back. Most people then took the vaccine to
remove the zombie disease, because who wants to be a zombie with glowing red eyes? But they were still alive and healthy.
Read the rest here

This is my wife’s favorite short story. What is yours? Let me know and I’ll give you a free book.

Get Your Fourth Free Short Story Right Here

Free Short Stories — Click here to get The Butterfly Effect

The Butterfly Effect

by Andy Zach

“Whatcha doing, Brice?” my boss Wilma O’Reilly asked, after sneaking up behind me.

I jumped. As usual, I was cruising the internet, bored with my job. Wendy was my boss. How awkward.

We worked at Vegan Inc, an agricultural conglomerate. I was their lead geneticist in charge of enhancing the qualities of the corporation’s vegetable products through genetic modification.
Thinking fast, I said, “Uh, researching. I’m reading about the ‘Butterfly Effect’. It shows how small changes lead to great changes far away. Like a butterfly’s wing causes a cyclone on the other side of the earth.” That should work since that was what I was reading.

“How is this related to your current assignment of increasing the yield of our zucchini varieties?”

“I’m trying to relate my past success with cucumbers to zucchinis.”

“I’d think you’d just do what you did last time when I promoted you.”

“Well, I did and it didn’t work for zucchinis. I tried zombie hummingbird DNA, zombie turkey DNA, and twenty other zombie animals as well. But nothing worked. So I’m stretching my mind to the farthest reaches of what might be possible.”

“That might work. Try this scenario for a possibility: if you don’t make progress in another month, you’ll lose your position. You got promoted for great success. You’ll get demoted for failure.” Then she smiled sunnily and said, “Have a nice day!” as she left me.
Click here to read the rest.

Scroll down for your next free short story

Red-eyed Fashion
Get Free Short Stories — Red-eyed Fashion

Red-Eye Fashion

by Andy Zach

The Taser hit me in the back. I convulsed uncontrollably, shocked out of sleep.

“Okay, wakey, wakey. Time to go model for your mistress,” squeaked a high tenor.

The bearded hulk who guarded us held his Taser ready, in case Lulu and I weren’t fast enough. He was so hairy, I couldn’t tell where his beard ended and his chest began. We donned the haute couture apparel set before us. He nodded his approval and gestured toward the door. He always followed us with his Taser.

“We’ve been here weeks and we don’t know your name. What shall we call you?” I ventured. I had some vague hope of putting him at his ease so we could escape.

He laughed. “Call me Gronk.” He wheezed when he laughed.

So I got him to laugh. Maybe that was progress. Maybe not. He also laughed when he tortured us with the Taser.
Read the rest here.

This is my darkest short story. Be prepared!

Be Prepared!

Enjoy this funny SciFi Short Story

We’ve Got It!

By Andy Zach

“Okay, that’s it,” said my Dad.

“What’s it?” I asked.

“You’ve got until next week to move out.”

“Um, where will I live?”

“That’s your problem isn’t it? Try the local apartments. Look for rooms to rent on the internet.”

I could tell by his grim expression he was serious this time. He’d been nagging me for nearly a year to move out and ‘set up housekeeping’ on my own, ever since I’d graduated from the state university with my BA in Video Game art and my minor in computer science. I’d managed to wheedle him out of it and
delay the date. Until now.

I’d been saving money from my Game Stop job to move out, but I kept dipping into it to add to my video game equipment. I had a sweet system, the fastest I could afford using the latest alien technology. Oh. I needed to find some place to keep all my equipment too. And I needed internet access–high speed. I
had to have at least gigabit per second speed or I couldn’t keep competing.

This might affect my standing in the Fortnight league. My stomach clenched in worry. I texted my best friend Nick.
Read the rest here

Your Last Free Short Story

A Hamster’s Tale

By Andy Zach

How fascinating! Dancer thought. This book says there are libraries where hundreds of books live. It also
says the fiction books are in order by author name.

Dancer scurried off Your Sixth Year Reader to look at Jeremy Gentle’s bookshelf again. Jeremy was his
owner and unknowing educator. Ever since he’d taught himself to read by studying the newspapers lining the bottom of his cage, he’d craved reading.

He hadn’t figured out why he started reading. One day he’d noticed patterns in the markings. He saw they repeated themselves in clumps. He saw the clumps formed patterns. He also listened to his owners differently. They also spoke in patterns. “Jeremy” was always called “Jeremy” or “Jeremy Gentle” by the his mother, and sometimes by his father.

Dancer had learned to understand Jeremy and his parents, and then he’d put the terms they spoke with the clumps on the paper. Each letter had a sound, and together they formed clumps his master called “words.”

The idea was brilliant. No wonder they were his owners and he was only a hamster
Read the rest of the last short story

In addition to being in Oops, my short story collection, this story is also found in my Secret Supers series, consisting of these books:

Villain's Vacation cover — Villain’s Vacation cover

Secret Supers

Jeremy Gentle fell flat on his face at therapy. That was normal since he had cerebral palsy. But his new superpower wasn’t normal.

Then things got weirder when his best friend, Dan Elanga, got a different superpower. But Dan was still blind.

What should the four friends do? Jeremy knew if the word got out, it’d be a media circus. Then they started fighting crime, as the Secret Supers. Who knew a disability could be a perfect disguise? No one would ever think of disabled kids as superheroes. Then they ran into problems they never expected.

Villain’s Vacation

Jeremy Gentle fell flat on his face at therapy. That was normal since he had cerebral palsy. But his new superpower wasn’t normal.

Then things got weirder when his best friend, Dan Elanga, got a different superpower. But Dan was still blind.

Posted on August 7, 2022August 7, 2022 by admin

Memes Reviews, and Free Books

Memes, Reviews, and Free Books – all picked out by me, Andy Zach.

I thought, “What should I post?”. What have I been reading? Books and of course, then I review them. I also have memes I’ve been seeing. Finally, I have free books to give to you.

Let’s start with the free books: click here to get yours.

Memes, Reviews – Let’s Begin Right Here

Isn’t English a funny language? Let me know if you speak any other language than English and I’ll give you a free book. Click here. Or, you can email me at [email protected]

My recent fantasy review:

Review of	MELIK NIGHTCAT and THE ELVEN PRINCE: The Key Of Brundag (Kindle Edition)
Rating	4 of 5 stars
Shelves	fantasy, humor, read, ya-fiction
Format	Kindle Edition
Status	August 3, 2022 – Shelved as: humor
Review	This was my first book by J Kirk Perry and it was an autographed first edition–and certainly worth it! I read it in one sitting last night. Melik begins in an out-of-the-way farming village, entertaining the locals when an elven prince shows up and arrests him. The local Jarl wants him for something. Melik can escape but gives his word not to. Also, he’s dying to know how the elven prince, a rather stuck-up and superior mage, found him. That doesn’t get revealed until the end of the book. Meanwhile, the rambunctious, impulsive, and unconventional Melik, a thief and a mage and a secret agent for the Empress, goes on a wild series of adventures with the elvan prince: staid, conventional, and convinced of his own superiority. Highly recommended to anyone who wants some good fantasy fun.

Memes, Reviews – More to Come

SciFi Fuel Paranormal Privateers
Memes Reviews — The cover of my third novel Paranormal Privateers. Click to get yours.

The most recent review follows:

5.0 out of 5 stars

Action, humor, refreshing zombies; Yes please!

Reviewed in the United States on July 1, 2022

This series is the first I have read of Andy Zach’s and I am glad I picked it up! The series continues with lots of action, characters continue to be developed, humor, and the zombies are still not mindless shells ambling around awaiting an axe to the head. Still a refreshing take on zombies as a whole. I look forward to what Andy writes next! Audio Version: Phil Blechman and Raven Perez do a great job with their respective characters and the overall narration.
Nemesis

The Memes Keep Coming At You!

Send me a meme! Get a book by clicking here!

Posted on August 4, 2022August 4, 2022 by admin

Your Best Science and July Science Fiction

Your Best Science and July Science Fiction as curated by me, Andy Zach. I’ve been cruising the internet for the biggest and best science news. This is what will fuel my next SciFi and fantasy books, Plus, I’ll tell you how you can get free books.

TLDR version: Click here to get free books from me. What books you ask? These three, for example:

Christmas Zombie Turkey Style
July Science Fiction — Life After Life Chronicles is available as a series! Click to get on Amazon.

If you want signed copies at a lower price than Amazon, with free shipping and no taxes, click here.

July Science Fiction – Your first book

Midshipman Henry Gallant in Space (The Henry Gallant Saga, #1)
Rating	4 of 5 stars
Shelves	military-scifi, read, science-fiction edit
Format	Kindle Edition edit
Status	August 1, 2022 – Finished Reading4 Show more
Review	Author Peter Alesso does a good job in his opening novel of this series. He portrays the troubles of being a normal human being in a time of genetic advancement. Then he details the technical training of a midshipman in the United Planets federation. But there is an alien force lurking in the solar system. So far they have been benign. Will that continue? Read and find out.

Do you have comments? Do you have a review you want me to publish? Just let me know by clicking here.

July Science Fiction – Your Second Book Follows

Zombie Detective: The Extraordinary Adventures of Sam Melvin by Andy Zach (Goodreads Author)

Jul 27, 2022

It was amazing

When Lisa fires Sam he doesn’t know what he’s going to do, for about two seconds till she tells him he has until that night to find a new career. He works better under the deadline and she should know because she’s his wife. This book was one of the funniest books I have ever read.
I love Simon Carr’s books and because I have brought all of his books I wanted to find a new author who was just as funny and I found him. I had no idea zombie animals were that prevalent but they are in this guy investigates the situation and when he’s hired by the government crazy things ensue.
I love this book and highly recommend it if you love to laugh and trust me they have giggles on every page. You can really truly tell when comedy comes natural and when they are trying too hard in this author his comedic talent in spades I cannot say enough how funny this book is and can’t wait to read the second one in the theories or at least I hope they have a second one.
I was given this book by the author in story origin but I am leaving this review voluntarily please forgive any mistakes as I am blind and dictate my review but all opinions are definitely my own.
Janalyn Prude‘s review

Now Here Is Where You Get Science

Maybe you thought my zombie novel as science fiction was far-fetched? Guess again! We’ve got zombie cyborg spiders coming at you!

How old are your ears, based upon the test below? Just play the video and note the age when you can no longer hear the signal. Mine were 64, which is pretty close to my real age of 66.

Tell me your results and I’ll send you a free book. Click here.

Cities of the future are always a good SciFi trope. Here’s one planned for Saudi Arabia. Would you like to live in this city?

Moving on to astronomy, check out this new supernova, recently discovered by the James Webb Space Telescope:

What color is the moving square in the following video? My answer is below.

The square color is midway between the blue and the orangish pink, a kind of gray.

Finally, the classic SciFi image is a pinwheel or cartwheel galaxy. I once read a book about the view of the Milky Way from the Lesser Magellanic Cloud. It filled the sky.

Posted on March 31, 2022March 31, 2022 by admin

Your Best Science Science Fiction, and Fantasy of March

Your Best Science, Science Fiction, and Fantasy of March is right here. Author Andy Zach scans the internet for you. What’s there?

I’ve got so much for you! Where do I start?

Here’s a science fiction review of one of my favorite books:

Overall 5 out of 5 stars

Performance 5 out of 5 stars

Story 5 out of 5 stars

03-23-22

Another winner by Andy Zach!

Unique and wonderful book for young people. Kids see a whole new side of kids with special needs. Not weird. Just kids who are facing a different sort of challenge than they are. The story is fun and believable. It kept me interested, and I’m an old lady!
june on Audible

Do you want to write your own review? Click here to get a free audiobook:

These audiobooks include the following as well:

Life After Life Chronicles March Fourth
Your Best Science Science Fiction — Enjoy all four novels in audiobook, paperback, or Kindle format!

Your Best Science Science Fiction Ahead!

At this point in the bloc you get some science fiction. Along with some laughs.

New review for Zombie Turkeys!

Overall 4 out of 5 stars

Performance 4 out of 5 stars

Story 4 out of 5 stars

03-18-22

funny

This is a parody of all those zombie apocalypse books and films. Zombie turkeys are loose in Illinois. It was hysterical when the fresh turkeys in the grocery store came to life. I had fun imagining the governor calling out the National Guard to protect turkey farms and hunt down the zombie turkeys. They were to use specially trained turkey dogs. Give this a try.
mary

Do you want to give me a piece of your mind? Just drop a note here .

We’re Not Done! Your Science Science Fiction Fantasy Continues Below

Enjoy these gorgeous pictures of – cold water invertebrates. Who would have thunk it?

How do I follow up such a nerdy article? With a nerdier video about battery manufacturing and technology.

You see, I’m a nerd. I love all science and technology. But I’ve been especially following Tesla battery and electric car technology. Check out the next video.

What can top these stories? How about this fantasy story below?

A half-goblin and his pet honey badger battle pirates

A humorous origin story

Get the story!

Available in PDF, MOBI, and ePub

When a teenaged Anuka Sandbar, criminally handsome half-goblin, visits the world’s most famous Orc brothel only the sort of fun Anuka is known for can ensue. This short story is an introduction to the beloved hero of the Dragons of Dorwine Series.

Posted on March 17, 2022March 17, 2022 by admin

Book Conventions – as an author

Book Conventions – as an author. I’ve been to two conventions in two weeks and I’m going to another one this week. What’s it like as an author? I’ll let you know below.

Plus, I’ve got a new review of a fantasy book for you. Then I have my usual free book offers. And I’ll let you know about a sale, coming up this Sunday, March 20, first day of spring.

Begin With the Future – What Conventions Are Approaching?

A simple search for book conventions brings up hundreds. My first filter was, “What’s in Peoria?”

In 2016, when I published my first book, nothing.

Best Science Stories Zombie Turkeys Gift
Book Conventions — Get your Zombie Turkeys here. You get a bushel of laughter with each book.

5.0 out of 5 stars

This one is definitely NOT a turkey!

Reviewed in the United States on July 18, 2017

‘He felt great. He was full of energy, he had many hens to breed with, and he was the leader of a great flock.’

Sam Melvin is a reporter with the Midley Beacon, it’s a tiny local paper – with an online presence – run by its penny-pinching editor Lisa Kambacher. When Sam sees the two turkey hunters on the slab in the local mortuary, he knows he has a story to cover and he sets out to do so with great gusto. As the zombie turkeys multiply, Sam and Lisa are the leading media team on the ground and the Midley Beacon goes international, solving their financial woes and syndicating their work across the globe. But it’s not all good news. After all, there are those people-killing zombie turkeys heading into town…

Alara

Book Conventions — Andy Zach at Chambanacon

So, I went to Chambanacon, in Bloomington. It was one hour drive from Peoria. It cost some money, but I was willing to risk it. I had fun and sold some copies of my first book.

That’s pretty much how I pick my conventions.

Book Conventions -The Next Step is Packing

What to pack? How about books?

I have seven different books (soon to be eight!) and almost two hundred copies. What to take?

Life After Life Chronicles March Fourth
Book Conventions — Enjoy all four novels in audiobook, paperback, or Kindle format!

All of them.

What else should I take?

From the very beginning, I’ve always had a signup list for my newsletter. People who buy my books are my favorite people. What if they want more? You can sign up here and get free books.

I pile about a hundred books into my rolling suitcase and another hundred in cardboard boxes ‘just in case I need them.’

Should I take anything else? How about posters, table swag (candy, business cards, bookmarks), and decorations.

Here’s my most recent convention, showing everything I’ve mentioned so far:

Surely that’s everything, right? Surely not!

Surely you can’t be serious!

Looking through my most recent packing list, other things are:

tablecloth
duck tape
extension cord
computer and cord and case
two cell phones with chargers
credit card reader
book stickers
cash box
receipt book
vaccination card
mask
tea thermos
lunch box
moving dolly

Book Conventions – Being There

I get totally hyped at book conventions. I love meeting my customers and future customers. Then I get to read from my books for them. Perhaps the best of all is meeting newsletter subscribers who love my newsletter and my books. No, I think the best is when a person buys my next book after enjoying one.

But wait, there’s more!

from ‘Scary Movie’

I also get to meet and talk with other authors–and–wait for it–learn from them!

Yes, I don’t know everything. I’m always picking up new ideas and approaches to writing and promoting my books.

What’s the Down Side?

There are negatives. First, you’ve got to schlep hundreds of pounds of stuff to your booth location and set everything up.

Next, you’ll get tired. Sit down, then stand and talk. Repeat for eight hours. Before, during, and afterward, be positive. Don’t let them see you cry, moan, or complain.

Finally, you’ll lug your luggage back to your car and drive home.

Do you have any questions for me? Just ask me by clicking here.

What About My Books on Sale?

Oh, right. I’ll have two books on sale from March 20 to 27, 2022. Here they are:

Interesting Links
Book Conventions — Secret Supers – click for free audiobook.

On sale at Amazon for .99.

Everyone can be brave and heroic

I love that someone is writing fun superstories in which disabled and differently abled kids can see themselves as potentially brave and heroic. The story doesn’t just show them doing impossible things that fully abled people can’t even do; it shows them using their heads to solve problems and cooperating together to use their different gifts to change the world for the better. And it’s well told, with a youthful sounding narrator that highlights the 12-13 years of the characters.

I received this free audiobook and voluntarily left this honest review.
Krista Gimeno

Book Convention – One More Book

Villain's Vacation cover
Book Conventions — Villain’s Vacation cover

5.0 out of 5 stars

Kids with Disabilities Saving the World + a hamster

Note: While this is Book 2 in the series, it works pretty well as a stand alone story (tho book 1 is a lot of fun).

Once again the Secret Supers (Jeremy, Dan, Kayla, and Aubrey) combine their skills to fight evil! Well, actually, they were having a bit of a vacation and evil found them. But evil will certainly be sorry! Once again, Andy Zach gives us another delightful kids’ book. I’ve listened to his other audiobooks, including the Zombie Turkeys books, and this is a great addition to that collection.

DabOfDarkness

Posted on January 14, 2022January 14, 2022 by admin

What’s New Science and Reviews in 2022?

What’s New Science and Reviews in 2022? Find out as I go through breaking science news and book reviews so far this year.

Let’s begin with military science, which is becoming military SciFi.

A 1000-mile cannon would be revolutionary, but it’d be rather like a hypersonic weapon on a movable platform. One of my favorite military SciFi series is by John Ringo concerning the invasion of the alien Posleen. In it, he has a super cannon mounted on a battleship–and a tank.

Have you read John Ringo’s Posleen/Aldenata series? Let me know and I’ll send you a free copy of:

If you like free books, reviews, videos, and fun, you’ll get all by signing up for my newsletter. Click here to get your free books.

What’s New Science and Reviews?

Try this new review!

5.0 out of 5 stars
Contact Butterball! Central Illinois is being taken over by turkeys!
Reviewed in the United States on November 9, 2021
I really wasn’t expecting much from a book about zombie turkeys. I don’t watch the zombie tv shows or movies, so I was expecting this to be some creepy story where evil wins, and good people are destroyed. Guess what? That’s pretty much how this book was, yet it was done in a fun and entertaining way.
I didn’t think it was hilarious, as some people said. However, it was obviously written tongue in cheek with lots of opportunities to chuckle…if you aren’t worried where the next zombie outbreak is happening!
I moved to Florida from Central Illinois MANY years ago, so I was pleasantly surprised when the zombie plague visited all the small towns back home. I wonder if there really are turkey farms around there? Hmmm, I DO remember lots of corn. Maybe I had better go on Amazon and get me a flame thrower before I go back up to visit!
Grab some snacks, (Anything but corn chips,) and enjoy a good read. (You’ll understand when you finish reading it!)
june

More New Science

I can’t let the new James Webb Space Telescope go by unnoticed.

While we’re on the topic of space, I have to share this video of SpaceX’s science-fiction gantry, designed to catch a returning booster.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NVUEV2MytJo

SpaceX testing its gantry.

Another New Review

What's New Science What's New Science — Cover of At the End of the World

Review of	At the End of the World (Black Tide Rising, #7)
Rating	4 of 5 stars
Shelves	read edit
Format	Kindle Edition edit
Status	December 24, 2021 – Finished Reading2 Show more
Review

Freom Goodreads

Just finished this book tonight. Charles Gannon writes a crackling good story about John Ringo’s zombie apocalypse from a wholly different point of view in a wholly new setting.
The point of view? A sailing ship full of teens learning to sail on the ocean. Their plan is to sail to South Georgia Island off Antarctica. The point of view is Alvaro, a savant from the tough streets of LA with a perfect memory.
He doesn’t hit it off with anyone among the other teens, but especially Chloe–a hyper aggressive and hostile teen from Alaska. The gruff and taciturn captain tasks him with learning to navigate. Then he has to teach it to the other teens–starting with Chloe. First he has to teach her how to read.
By this time the zombie outbreak has begun around the world. The captain maintains radio silence and trains the teens for survival in the new world. Their first challenge is at South Georgia Island.
Altogether a satisfying read.
Andy Zach’s review

Laugh at this Science-Fiction on Video

This video defies description. But it’s funny, if you use the subtitles, or if you speak Russian.

Russian Spacetrain – Just What You Want

You’re Final Science Fiction Audio Dramatization

In A Pickle dramatization

This short story is in my collection, Oops!

latest science news What's New Science — Oops! short story collection. Click to get.

Oh, and here is the latest review of Oops!

5.0 out of 5 stars
Short stories to keep you looking for zombies!
Reviewed in the United States on January 10, 2022
I started by reading this author’s book about the Turkey Apocalypse. I had so much fun (yes, fun, even though the turkeys were out killing everyone and thing in their path!) Then I read about the Undead Mother in law. Even better! Each book gets more accomplished than the next.
This one was a surprise! I thought I had purchased the same book twice (I’ve been known to do that!) However, this is just a group of short stories that are prequels or sequels to the others that fill in some questions I didn’t know I had or start me on a new train of thought.
Fun to read! Just make sure you check all wildlife around you for metal caps before you settle in! They’re watching you!
june

Posted on November 7, 2021November 7, 2021 by admin

Zombie Detective Audiobook Preview

Zombie Detective Audiobook Preview – My latest book Zombie Detective is on sale. (Click here to get it before the sale ends) I’m giving you a preview of this audiobook! This is the first time I’ve EVER uploaded a pre-production version of any audiobook.

Now, this audiobook won’t be published until Christmas. If you’re dying to hear more of this story, check out the other audiobooks in the Life After Life Chronicles series. I list them below.

Ace zombie reporter Sam Melvin has been fired–by his wife, Lisa. Their paper, The Midley Beacon, is barely surviving. How will they make ends meet?
Sam decides to give being a detective a try. He advertises his business–but his zombie experience comes with it. All across the country, people bring their zombie problems to Sam. Squirrels? Bulls? Sam’s on the case. But can his experience with zombie turkeys transfer?
Sam finds out in a series of deadly adventures–and so will you when you read this book. See if you can keep from dying from laughter.
From Zombie Detective

Zombie Turkeys – The Zombie Detective Audiobook Story Begins

2021 Reviews Zombie Turkeys Audible — Audiobook cover – click to listen.

Sam Melvin, an underachieving e-reporter from a small town, changes forever when he meets turkeys that won’t stay dead. You can shoot ’em, chop ’em, burn ’em—they come back stronger. The undead plague of poultry spreads uncontrollably, rocking the whole country.
Sam’s editor, Lisa Kambacher, snipes at Sam for plebeian writing but uses her intelligence to pursue the lucrative carnivorous turkey story. Sam and Lisa ricochet across the landscape, tracking turkeys and fleeing the bloodthirsty hordes.
Sam and Lisa doubt their ability to survive. If you have a heart condition or lack humor, you should not read Zombie Turkeys, no matter how much you want to find out what happens.
From Zombie Turkeys

See all my Zombie Turkeys audiobook reviews by clicking here.

Zombiism Spreads to Humans in My Undead Mother-in-law

My mother-in-law’s a zombie. And she has anger-management issues.
My mother-in-law, Diane Newby, zombified by accident. She still volunteers at her church bake sales and cooks pot roast for her daughter and son-in-law, Ron Yardley. What ticks her off is when people don’t treat her like a normal human being – with glowing red eyes and super strength and speed. And if she doesn’t get her own way, look out. She explodes and leaves broken plaster and body parts in her wake. Nothing stops her: not brick walls, the federal government, or middle-aged spread.
But the world’s most powerful criminal plans to control zombies. His only problem with zombies is that they have way too much free will. He has a solution for that. But will it work with Diane Newby?
The world divides into pro-zombie and anti-zombie factions. Battles break out everywhere. Which side will you take? Who will live and who will die?
You might not survive this audiobook. But at least you’ll die laughing.
From Audible

The End of the Chronicles – so far

Zombies charge first, ask questions later.
Middle-aged, overweight, and undead, Diane Newby leads the paranormal privateers against criminals and corruption. Sailing to trouble spots too sensitive for the US government, with zombie strength and regeneration they beat bullies into submission. Aided by zombie turkeys, corgis, and bulls, vicious criminal geniuses fall before them. If Diane gets overwhelmed by foes, her lovely zombie bodyguards and romantic zombie husband come to the rescue.
Out of the blue, new foes appear. Or are they friends? Or both? The frenemies neutralize zombies and orchestrate world peace. They disrupt the economy and produce fabulous wealth. Even the greatest criminals and governments can’t stop them from dominating the world.
Can humanity afford the price of peace? All must surrender freedom to a not-so-benign dictatorship. Diane and the paranormal privateers must do the unthinkable to save humanity. But is it enough?
In an explosive and unconventional ending to Andy Zach’s Life After Life Chronicles, you will learn what happens when the paranormal privateers meet the world’s greatest fear. And you will laugh all the way.
From Audible Click to listen.

Yet More Zombie Detective Audiobook Goodness

How can there be more to the Chronicles than the last book–so far? How about a collection of short stories, assembled from before, during and after the Chronicles? Here they are.

Accidents happen. Especially around zombie turkeys. Then you add zombie humans, and problems proliferate. Mix in some ill-planned genetic engineering, and things get crazy.
The insanity continues, from the story where zombies are merged with cucumbers to the one where two basement-dwelling nerds gain access to all video content from the past two hundred years – from aliens.
Andy Zach pulls out all the stops on his imagination as he serves up this smorgasbord of silliness. Try it. Laughter is good for your soul.
From Audible. Click to listen.

Since You’ve Read This Far, I Have a Gift for You

What is it? ALL my audiobooks, including Zombie Detective, for free!

Just click here to get them.

Posted on October 29, 2021November 5, 2021 by admin — 1 Comment

Zombie Turkeys Audible Reviews

Zombie Turkeys Audible reviews are right here for you!

Audible is the Amazon owned audiobook store. Follow the link below to check out the site.

Zombie Turkeys Audible Reviews – The First Follows

Some of these reviews were repeated on Amazon. If I recognize it, I won’t post it again. These should all be new.

As I did with the Amazon reviews, we’ll begin with the oldest review first.

Overall 4 out of 5 stars
Performance 4 out of 5 stars
Story 4 out of 5 stars

Kim
03-17-18

Zombie Turkeys

What did you like best about Zombie Turkeys? What did you like least?
There were times when the book was laugh out loud funny, but other times it was just cheesy. Also, repetitive use of the word “said” in the dialog portions was obnoxious.
I’m increasing my rating on this book, because I listened to it over a year ago, and it still pops into my head sometimes. I still say “Zombie Turkey” every time I hear a turkey gobble. And I felt compelled to order an autographed copy of the book. All of this says to me that I under-rated it the first time, and need to make it right.

Would you be willing to try another book from Mr. Andy Zach? Why or why not?
Yes. I want to know where his zombies go from here.

Which scene was your favorite?
Roland trying to get Lashaun to come out of the tree. She didn’t want to come down, because the turkeys had pecked her backside and it was showing through her pants.

Did Zombie Turkeys inspire you to do anything?
Not eat turkey. Say “Zombie Turkeys” every time I hear a turkey gobble.

Any additional comments?
The male narrator did a good job, but the female narrator didn’t differentiate very well between her different characters.
Kim

On to your next Zombie Turkeys Audible Review

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Chapter 2 Icon

Amazon Customer
07-31-19

i saw the title and thought it was catchy. after reading it i ordered the rest in the series.
Amazon Customer

Overall 5 out of 5 stars

Writing Paranormal Privateers First Draft Zombie Turkeys Audible — Paranormal Privateers Chapter 16 icon – London – Click to find out what happens!

Susan Ratner
11-24-19

Zombie Turkeys by Mr. Andy Zach is a fun romp of a listen!

Zombie Turkeys by Mr. Andy Zach is a funny, quixotic romp of a listen. It follows the exploits of two intrepid blogger/(initially) online reporters, Sam and Lisa, as they track and help to combat a spreading infestation of killer zombie turkeys. It combines a unique take on zombies, a love story, some quasi-science, and lots of action.
I listened to the Audible audio book and initially I wasn’t sure I liked the narrator but eventually I warned to him. If you like unusual zombie stories with a new approach to story telling and lots of twists and turns, this audio book or book may be for you. I enjoyed listening to it and will be keeping the author on my radar!
Susan Ratner

Like them so far? Do you want a copy of Zombie Turkeys on Audible for free? Join my newsletter by clicking here.

Do you have some other comment for me? Here’s a hotline to reach me. Click here.

More reviews coming up. Scroll down now.

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Virgil Perryman
03-24-20

A cautionary tale about pandemics or zombies

When you first listen it an amusing story the narrative is absolutely amusing, and the story a bit “camp”, but under it’s comic veneer ss I listened ” locked in” at home from Covid 19 something very familiar emerges.
Yes this is a fun to listen to, totally entertaining book and one you can’t storing listening to, however somewhat deeper it reflects the incompetent and bungling we are now experiencing world wide with this and possible other pandemics to come. This story parodies a disaster of Zombie Turkeys…but perhaps it warns us there could be far worst. Please do listen it overall great story and extraordinary naration.
Virgil Perryman

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

New Science Books — Andy Zach’s new scifi detective mystery.

1OldGal
05-06-20

Infectious laughter

This very funny tale has it all. There’s peril, adventure, mayhem, even a love story and a happy ending.

I laughed so hard that I occasionally had to stop and go back a few minutes so I could hear what I missed while I was cracking up.
There were moments when I had to wipe my eyes, because I was laughing so hard I cried.

I received a free copy of this audiobook in exchange for my honest opinion.
1OldGal

You’ve got more Zombie Turkeys Audible Reviews Coming Up!

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Chapter 3 icon

Walt
05-11-20

Loved this Audiobook.

You have to check this book out. This was a far better book than I thought it would be. Mr Andy Zach has a ‘ell of a imagination, and Mr Phil Blechman does a great narration. I especially loved his turkey gobbling sounds, I had a great laugh every time he did it.
Walt

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Marie
05-20-20

Attack of the Killer Zombie Turkeys

I reviewed a copy of the audio book from the author in exchange for my honest review, and here it is. First book read/ listen from Andy Zach, and I’m totally hook. can’t wait to hear/ RAF the remaining series. the story line is very entertaining, and the way they perform (yes perform not read) the book was perfect. Love the sound affects, they just made the story come to live. This story had it all, from killer zombies, love, mystery, and action. it’s a must read/ hear. I totally recommended.
Marie

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Lisa M.
06-03-20

So much fun!

This book is so mutch fun!! It’s silly and ridiculous, but in a great way! It just brought a smile to my face and an extra skip in my step as I listened at work. My day is pretty monotonous and even the regular audiobooks I listen too just felt monotonous.
I had already listened to My Undead Mother in Law and I remembered I had this one also. Remembering how entertaining U.D.M.I.L was I decided to play this one because I needed a pick me up. And pick me up it did.
I made note of certain parts so I could play them for my husband at our lunch break. Definitely worth your time. The narrator’s are perfect for this series. The turkey calls made me laugh out loud. Great job to all involved!!
Lisa M.

Overall 4 out of 5 stars
Performance 4 out of 5 stars
Story 4 out of 5 stars

Chapter icon from Zombie Detective

Daphne L Thompson
07-15-20

Dark Humor

This dark comedy combines action and humor set mostly against the back drop of rural Indiana. Sam and his editor Lisa run a small town newspaper, and in their search for a good lead stumble across the story of a life time – Zombie Turkeys!
We follow the turkeys as they make their way from farm to farm gathering more all but immortal fowl while leaving death and destruction in their wake. Sam, Lisa, and soon more reporters track the turkeys across the country side learning not just how to fight back but how to destroy them. This story is not just action packed but is also full of unexpected heros and even has time for a love story or two.
Daphne L Thompson

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

maggie unsicher — Maggie Unsicher zombie phebotimist and video gamer

Dana Fernandez
03-12-21

Zombie Turkeys 🦃

This was an amazing story. It was very entertaining with many LOL moments. I’m definitely hooked. Can’t wait to listen to the next one.

The narrators definitely made my day. They brought this book to life. Would recommend this book and author.
Dana Fernandez

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 3 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Zombie Turkeys chapter icon

Kindle Customer
03-16-21

Zombie Turkeys

It’s part outrageously funny, bizarre and compelling. A very good and entertaining and riveting story.
Kindle Customer

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 4 out of 5 stars

Andy
03-20-21

Dumb…silly…juvenile…couldnt put it down

Comfort food for that juvenile part of you that never quite outgrew your comic books. Just forget that it’s preposterous (after all, you were already warned by the title; what did you expect?), and go with the flow…
Andy

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 4 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Ogolden1
06-09-21

Zombie Turkeys is a great listen/read

I loved this book. I am a fan of horror fiction. this is a great new angle for the zombie horror genre
Ogolden1

Overall 5 out of 5 stars
Performance 5 out of 5 stars
Story 5 out of 5 stars

Chapter icon from Zombie Detective

Zoe J
09-06-21

Funny

What added to the Zombie Turkey situation was the author took the reader through the different towns of Illinois by a reporter working on his big story added great humor to the saga. The reader has to wonder how Mr Zach dreams up these crazy stories but they all seem to work.
Zoe J

No room for my Goodreads reviews! I’ll have to write another post

Posted on October 1, 2021October 1, 2021 by admin

Super Science Stories from September for You

Super Science Stories for you, selected by sensei Andy Zach from September’s internet. Let’s start with this super story.

How do you feel about bringing the wooly mammoth back to life? Some think we should work at saving our current elephant species around the world. Others think mammoths may upset the current ecosystem in the arctic.

As a long-time dinosaur and paleontological fan, I’d love it. But let me know what you think in a comment or by contacting me here. I’ll give an ebook to each response

Super Science Stories Continued

This is a valid question. The US military has explored airship designs for sixty years. They can go to the stratosphere, above all weather and be supplied by airplanes indefinitely.

Is this science, or science fiction, or throwback science to steampunk fiction? Let me know by a comment or replying to me here. Contact us by clicking here.

Breaking News from Peoria on September 30, 2021!

Super Science Stories — Andy Zach’s new scifi detective mystery.

Yup, you’ve got it right: my latest novel is fully released as paperback and Kindle on Amazon. Of course, you can always get it at a discount, autographed, with free shipping from me by clicking right here.

If you can travel to Peoria tomorrow, you can see me at PeoriaCon at the Expo-Gardens. That’s only a mile from my house in northern Peoria! Please tell me you’ll be there and I’ll give you a free book. Click here or on the above post to let me know. Or just tell me on Saturday.

What is science fiction? I agree with Robert Heinlein’s definition below.

Look Out Below for More Science Stories

Is feasible fusion finally here?

Excuse my cynicism, but I’ve heard that fusion was right around the corner for at least fifty of my sixty-five years. When do you think it’ll be here?

Next, you’ve got some October humor, timely and topical.

I’ve got one last military scifi story for you. Or would you say this story is more science-based? The story does have biology and robotics inside of it.

Now for the real last meme of this post. Here you go, my friends. Get ready for some football! With eggs.

Posted on September 2, 2021September 2, 2021 by admin

What Did You Miss in August? Find Out Below

What Did You Miss in August? Lots! Like this next meme. Who knew the Greeks were family with meme from 2,500 years later?

Of course, this meme is funnier if you’re familiar with both Greek mythology and current internet memes.

And the following photo:

Who doesn’t like a nice neck rub?

Then we have this video from Disneyland:

There’s still more to come! How about a pun?

How do I have all this time to find this stuff on the internet? I’m an author! I spend half my time writing and half my time cruising the internet. Like this next item.

Here’s your chance to get a free book. Comment below or reply to me by clicking here about which of these was your favorite. Then I’ll send you a copy of Zombie Turkeys.

What Did You Miss 2021 Reviews — Audiobook cover – click to listen.

What Did You Miss In Reviews? Scroll Down, Then You’ll See

Let’s start with this one I wrote a few days ago.

The Big Show & Other Tales (Bolo)
by Keith Laumer
Andy Zach‘s review
Aug 30, 2021
really liked it

This book has more military scifi short stories. Even though it’s about fifty years old, I didn’t give it five stars because it isn’t one of Keith Laumer’s more famous works.
Nonetheless, it’s a crackling good collection of military stories. I noticed some of Laumer’s characteristic impossible odds facing his antagonist, which are eventually overcome.
Recommended for any fan of military scifi, short stories, or Keith Laumer.
Andy’s review on Goodreads

I’ve got more reviews for you! Try this one on for size.

Now For a New Zombie Turkeys Review

What Did You Miss Zombie Apocalypse Recommendations — Zombie Turkey Apocalypse – Click to get an autographed copy

Nikki
4.0 out of 5 stars
An unusually unique zombie tale perfect for YAs.
Reviewed in the United States on August 25, 2021
I read this book to preview it for teen readers. I found it light and humorous considering it being a zombie tale. It’s perfect for young adults! But I wouldn’t recommend it for the hard-core adult zombie, post-apocalyptic fans.
Andy’s take is unique, fun, and refreshing. The story wraps up cleanly with minimal gore and lots of tongue-in-cheek remarks. How fun to learn you can order a flamethrower on Amazon!
By Nikki on Amazon

Have I got a deal for you! I’ll give you a free copy of Zombie Turkeys when you click here.

Your Closing Photo. Don’t Miss This Opportunity!

For a limited time, I’m offering my next book, Zombie Detective, autographed and at a discount. Oh, and you get free shipping as well. I lovingly pack each book with the same hands that typed it. Click the partial cover to get yours.

Zombie Detective Science Versus Science Fiction — Click to claim your pre-order discount!

Ace zombie reporter Sam Melvin has been fired—by his wife, Lisa. Their newspaper, the Midley Beacon, is barely surviving now that the zombie turkey apocalypse is over. How will they make ends meet?

Lisa convinces Sam to try his hand at being a private investigator. Sam Melvin, zombie detective, does have a certain ring to it. All across the country people bring their zombie problems to Sam. Squirrels? Bulls? Sam’s on the case. And his rates keeps rising. But when he meets unkillable human zombie criminals, will he survive?

Sam finds out in a series of deadly adventures—and so will you in Zombie Detective. If you can keep from dying from laughter.

Posted on July 2, 2021July 2, 2021 by admin

Get Your Best Book Reviews for June by Andy

Your Best Book Reviews are right here, my friend. These are the best books I’ve read this month.

Keep reading to the end or scroll down now and find out how to get free books of mine, like these:

Life After Life Chronicles Best Book Reviews — Enjoy all four novels in audiobook, paperback, or Kindle format!

Or these:

Oh, heck. Just click here to get your free audiobooks from me. Now you don’t have to scroll down.

Best Book Review – your first one’s here

Keith Laumer, in one of his last books, describes a dystopian United States from the perspective of Terrance Jackson, an astronaut awoken from suspended animation after eighty years.
It’s a delicious premise. Just as the spaceship was to launch a colonization trip to Callisto, the launch was aborted with one second to go. There are about a dozen crew members aboard: a full crew and a full backup crew.
All the crew is suspended, but they awake at different times by the computer program. Meanwhile, …more
by Andy Zach on Goodreads

Surprise! You’ll like this next book review

Outlandish Fun

Andy Zach continues his unrelenting attack on the horror/zombie genre with outlandish humor. What will society do with the new human zombies after the havoc caused by The Turkey Zombies?!? That was a rhetorical question…so just laugh! 😉
by JH & DDDH on Audible

Your Third of Best Book Reviews is Below Here