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Can You Handle My Villains from Villain’s Vacation?

Villain's Vacation cover What is it like?

Can You Handle My Villains from Villain’s Vacation? My book is .99 today and until June 12th. Get your copy by clicking here.

My Secret Supers are on summer vacation from 7th grade at a coaster park? Why would international criminals target innocent, 7th-grade superheroes? I’ll tell you why, revealing their motives by excerpts from my book.

If you’re not familiar with my Secret Supers team, I tell you all about them here: Meet My Disabled Superheroes. For each heroic teen (or pre-teen), I’ll give you a description from my book.

First villain up, Loretta.

Can You Handle My Villains – Loretta

A popup window appeared on my computer screen. “Loretta, do you wish to accept a video call from John Smith?” I read. I quickly clicked Accept.

As soon as a black-and-gray-haired man appeared on my computer screen, I said, “Oh, Papa Smith, I want to give up.”

“Why would you do that, Loretta? You’re one of the most successful children in our family business.”

“Bah! Four crummy kids beat me.”

“Well, yeah, but you didn’t know they were there in Maryville and they would come after your agent.”

“Sure, I knew they were there. They were all over the national news this past year.”

“But everyone just thinks they’re regular disabled kids. Heck, Andy Zach published their story as fiction. No one knew they had superpowers until we caught them on video defeating your agent.”

Meet My Villains – Loretta – Part 2

“The telekinesis kid, Jeremy, is really powerful, but the telepathic pair, Kayla and Dan, can’t be stopped or intercepted. That’s before you add a real super girl, Aubrey. Their disabilities gave them the perfect disguises.”

“That’s an idea. What if we publish that video and tell everyone they have superpowers? The fame would disrupt their lives and maybe distract them so we can take over Maryville.”

“Hmmm. Maybe. But that would also point back to us as the source of the video. And people might think it’s just a deep fake.”

He sighed. “You’re right. The government might also enlist them in the NSA or some other secret agency. We don’t want any attention from them. Tell you what. Take a vacation. You haven’t had a break for a long time. Maybe if you do something completely different, you’ll come up with a solution to the Secret Supers.”

“There’s a good idea, Papa. My last one was in Paris? Three years ago?”

“Yes. That was after you successfully rigged that state election and got our candidate elected.”

“What would be a complete change for me? Something outside a city, something fun—I know!”

“What?”

“I’ll go to Coaster World!”

“That’s right. You always loved coasters as a kid.”


Meet My Villains – Papa Smith

“Hi, Loretta. Are you all refreshed from your Paris vacation?”

“Hi, Papa Smith. Yes. I had a lot of fun waterskiing on the Riviera. I also cheated the casino in Monaco out of a million bucks.”

“Of course.

 “But now I’m refreshed and bored. I haven’t had a job since I left for Coaster World.”

“I’m glad to hear you say that. I’ve got a challenging assignment for you—the Secret Supers.”

Meet My Villains – Papa Smith, Part 2

“Ugh! I sure want to get back at them. But they’re backed up by the NSA. I’m not eager to tackle them and the US government.”

Papa stroked his hair. “The best cure for falling off a horse is to get back on. How about if I get a partner for you?”

“They’d better be awfully competent. I can’t really work with anyone who’s incompetent, or average, or merely a genius.”

“How about if you and I work together?”

I gasped. Papa Smith had raised me. He’d been very vague about what happened to my parents, so he was the only parent I’d known. I’d dreamt of working with him in the family crime business, but I hadn’t seen much of him once I went to college and began teaching, over fifty years ago. He was the one person I was pretty sure was smarter than me. Or at least he knew more.


Can You Handle My Villains? These Readers Did

What They Say About Villain’s Vacation

As electrifying as their powers!

5.0 out of 5 stars

Reviewed in the United States on May 2, 2024

“Villain’s Vacation” by Andy Zach, narrated by Michael Stafford, whisks you on a thrilling ride as four disabled seventh graders with superpowers take on Coaster World. The writing is as electrifying as their powers, keeping you glued to each twist and turn. Stafford’s narration brings each character to life, adding an extra layer of excitement to this action-packed adventure.

Nemesis

Secret Supers are back for another adventure!

5.0 out of 5 stars 

Reviewed in the United States on July 25, 2022

In this sequel to Secret Supers, Jeremy has been experimenting on his hamster. As a result, Dancer has learned how to read, and is reading everything he can to learn about the human world. When Jeremy discovers this, he gets Dancer one of his old cell phones so Dancer can text the group.

As for the superhero business, the group needs some downtime and goes on vacation to Coaster World. What they don’t realize is that the villain they defeated also loves roller coasters and wants revenge against the Secret Supers.

Will the Secret Supers be able to defeat the villain and enjoy their vacation, or are their crime-fighting days numbered?

This was a fun sequel to Secret Supers. Not only did we have Andy Zach as a character in the book, as though the events were true and actually happened, but I loved the inclusion of a Super-Hamster helping out Jeremy and his friends. In this battle against the villain, the Secret Supers struggle, as the villain seems to have figured out how to neutralize their powers, and they not only have to call in support but also reveal themselves to some non-Supers.

Jennifer C.

Can You Handle My Villains? – Click Here to Find out!

Villain's Vacation cover What is it like?
Can You Handle My Villain's
Villain’s Vacation cover

Any newsletter subscriber gets free audiobook codes–as long as they last. Click here to get yours. Don’t wait until they’re gone!

Do you want an autographed book? I’ll mail it directly to you with free shipping and I pay the taxes! Click here to get yours. My shipping may not be the same day, but at least it’s free–for you.

Got questions? Comments? Reach me directly by clicking here. I’ll get back to you as quickly as I can.

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Pick Up More Gifts for the 12 Days of Christmas

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is Secret-Supers-Series-150x150.jpg

Welcome 2024! Pick Up More Gifts for the 12 Days of Christmas. In this post you can get book excerpts, free, and discounted books for you!

You may be familiar with the 12 days of Christmas song. The actual 12 day festival ran from December 25th to January 6th, also known as Epiphany, when Christians celebrated the appearance of the wise men or magi from the east.

This post covers days seven to twelve.

Days one through six are here: Welcome 2024! Pick Up More Gifts for the 12 Days of Christmas

Here’s the song:

12 Days of Christmas

For those who don’t read past the first heading, here’s a free book gift for you. The giveaway only lasts until January 9th, so grab it quickly! Click here.

Produce Your Audiobook Secret Supers in Space
Secret Supers in Space audiobook cover. Click to listen.

The Secret Supers are bored out of their minds during summer vacation-until they go to Space Camp. They learn all about the space program, try out moon gravity and zero-g simulations, and practice docking with the International Space Station.

But that’s the easy part. The villains they defeated in the past are back with a diabolical plot that renders the middle schoolers’ superpowers ineffective. Jeremy, Aubrey, Dan, and Kayla face the biggest challenge of their lives. Even if they escape the villains’ clutches, will they survive?

Find out in Secret Supers in Space!

Pick Up More Gifts – Seven Swans a-Swimming

Where do I have seven swans a-swimming in my books? How about seven turkeys? Or more? Check out this excerpt from Zombie Turkeys from Chapter 9 – Chicago. Note the aquarium type chapter icon.

Pick Up More Gifts

They very cautiously looked in the topmost door. The door opened onto a platform looking down on a large pool full of sea creatures–including a great white shark. A man was there at the edge of the pool, blowing a turkey call. “GOBBLE! GOBBLE!” That was the odd sound Sam had heard. The zombie turkeys responded, “Gobble! Gobble!” and advanced en masse on the man, surrounding him. They seemed mesmerized by the call, staring with red eyes, but quietly marching forward. The man wore a khaki, camouflaged hunting outfit, cammo boots, and a full, bushy beard.

Sam called to him, “Hey you!  You can escape this way!”

He looked at them, “Yeah, I know. I’ve got to kill these buggers.”

“How will you kill them with a turkey caller?”

Pick Up More Gifts – Excerpt Continues

“By getting them into the pool with me. It’s salt water. I’ve already gone through my ammo!” He jumped into the aquarium.

“Noo! ” Lisa gasped.

From the water he called, ” GOBBLE! GOBBLE!” Like lemmings, the massed turkeys moved forward, plopping into the water like feathered, twenty pound Alka Seltzers. The ones behind pressed the others forward. Soon, hundreds upon hundreds of turkeys covered the surface of the water, like a turkey patterned pool cover.

As soon as they were in the salt water, the zombie turkeys lost their red eyes. They swam as well as turkeys normally do; badly. Then the great white shark hit. Gobbling the turkeys three and four at a time, the shark was delighted to have this extra feeding. This food was so fresh and crunchy!

The shark was an automatic eating machine; bite, crunch, swallow, bite crunch, swallow.

This excerpt is gift number two of seven. (After the Secret Supers in Space) Here are three free books in exchange for a review:

Book TitlePen NameEmail IntegrationAvailableSignups
Secret SupersAndy ZachGet your review copy here
Secret Supers in SpaceAndy ZachGet your review copy here
Zombie TurkeysAndy ZachGet your review copy here
Get your free review copies here!

That’s five gifts. Two more to come! First, get a free newsletter subscription here: Clickety-click!

Next, get personal with me, Andy Zach! Talk to me! You can reach me on x.com.

On to more days of Christmas–and gifts!

Pick Up More Gifts – Eight Maids a-Milking

Do I have eight maids a-milking in my writing? Anywhere? Not exactly. I do have eight reporters covering the zombie turkey outbreak for the Midley Beacon and milking it for all it’s worth. This excerpt from Zombie Turkeys, with the Chapter 9 Chicago icon. That’s a turkey caller in the turkey’s mouth. Why? Read and find out.

“I never thought I’d say this, Sam, but I think the story has gotten too big for the Midley Beacon. I’ve added a zombie turkey Twitter feed to our site, but this is way too big for us to be everywhere, even with the six new reporters I’ve hired. I’ve sent one to Bartonville and Peoria, one to Princeville, two to Joliet, one to Tinley Park, and one to Chicago. Chicago alone should have six reporters.”

“Well, let’s go to Chicago then. Three are better than one.”

“I’m with you on that. Lemme give Charlie a call. He’s our guy in Chicago.”  She called Charlie Gomez, one of their new reporters. “Hi Charlie, where are you?”

Pick Up More Gifts – Excerpt Part 2

“I can barely hear you. Oh, keep your head down, then. We’ll cover the loop activity then. Ok, good reporting. Stay alive!  Report daily or more often! Bye.”

“What’s up with Charlie?”

“He’s in the middle of the zombie turkey firefight in Soldiers Field. It’s quite a melee there. Let’s go to the loop.”

How about eight gifts? In addition to the excerpt above, I’ve got seven books available through free audiobook codes:

AuthorAndy Zach
1Zombie Turkeys (United Kingdom only)Andy Zach
2Secret SupersAndy Zach
3Secret Supers in SpaceAndy Zach
4Zombie DetectiveAndy Zach
5Villain’s VacationAndy Zach
6Paranormal PrivateersAndy Zach
7My Undead Mother-in-lawAndy Zach
8Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey ApocalypseAndy Zach

Pick Up More Gifts – Nine Ladies Dancing

Zombie Turkeys fly to escape to Zombie Turkey hunters

Have I got the excerpt for you! I’ve got twenty or more ladies dancing in this scene from My Undead Mother-in-law.

Frank always got hyped up before an operation, but this one was the strangest he’d ever been on. He’d done his time in Afghanistan and Iraq—that was where he’d lost his leg to an IED. When the marine doctors offered him a chance to get it back through zombie blood, he’d leapt upon it like a duck on a bug. Now he was landing a whole platoon of marines on a superyacht of a criminal, to prepare the landing of more zombies.

Things got stranger. Looking at the helipad as he descended, he saw a crowd of hula-skirt-clad girls—good looking ones too! The crowd resolved itself into a formation: a smiley face! As he landed and brought his weapon to ready, he saw each girl carried a basket of leis.

The Dancing Begins

SciFi Story Fuel My Undead Mother-in-law
Welcome 2024
Pick Up More Gifts
My Undead Mother-in-law cover.

“Welcome! Welcome!” they chorused in their soprano voices. They ran up to put the leis over his head. He kept them away with the bayonet on his automatic shotgun. Laughing, the nearest ones tossed leis over his gun and over his head. “Aloha Oe” blared in the background on the outdoor speakers as the attractive ladies began to sway in a hula dance en masse.

Yellow flowers decorated his head and his rifle. He felt awkward and a right fool. Already the battle plan was out the window.

“Ladies! Please gather over here!” He followed the contingency plan for if they surrendered.

Giggling, the hundred or so beauties compliantly assembled in the landing circle under the V-22, their hair and grass skirts blowing wildly in the hot rotor wash. After tearing his eyes from their shapely legs, he saw his friend Lieutenant Gerber walk up to him, festooned in leis.

“Not bad duty, eh?”

“Something about this smells.”

“Well, here come the zombie bulls. And turkeys.”

Nine gifts? How about nine discounts for autographed books? These paperbacks are discounted from the Amazon price. Get them here:

Pick Up More Gifts – Featured Items

Zombie Turkeys signed by author
Pick Up More Gifts

Zombie Turkeys signed by author

$12.00

My Undead Mother-in-law - Signed by author
Pick Up More Gifts

My Undead Mother-in-law – Signed by author

$12.00

Paranormal Privateers - Signed by author
Pick Up More Gifts

Paranormal Privateers – Signed by author

$15.00

Zombie Detective - signed by author
Pick Up More Gifts

Zombie Detective – signed by author

$12.00

Oops!  Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse - signed by author
Pick Up More Gifts

Oops! Tales of the Zombie Turkey Apocalypse – signed by author

$12.00

Villain's Vacation signed by author

Villain’s Vacation signed by author

$7.00

Secret Supers in Space signed by author

Secret Supers in Space signed by author

$7.00

Secret Supers Signed by author 2
The Gospel Medley - autographed copy

Secret Supers Signed by author 2

$7.00

The Gospel Medley – autographed copy

$15.00

Welcome 2024 Pick Up More Gifts – Ten Lords a-Leaping

Zombie Detective cover
Zombie Detective cover.

I don’t have ten lords a leaping (I do have several dozen drug lords, though). How about leaping hippos? What, you don’t believe me? Check out this hippo excerpt from Zombie Detective.

“Let me finish with the background. We wanted a fast-growing, healthy strain of pigs. I thought, Wouldn’t it be great if they grew as fast as zombie turkeys?

“Uh-oh.”

“Right. I created a pig modified with zombie turkey and hippo and mouse DNA.”

“What?” Sam’s stomach clenched.

“I won’t go into all my failures with other combinations. This one worked. I get pigs that grow from piglets to full-grown in four weeks.”

“But what’s the catch?”

“They look like hippos. And they grow only to about one pound.”

Micro-hippo
Micro-hippo

“Sounds more like a failure than a success.”

“They do taste like pork. And they reproduce fast enough to make up for their lack of size. But―” Bryce stopped and sighed.

“Tell me the worst.”

“They escaped my lab. They’re infesting the whole building. People keep finding them in the toilets. It’s very upsetting.”

So, these hippos leap and scamper like rats. Aquatic rats. Here’s a drawing of one from the chapter about them.

You want eight more gifts? Get all my excerpts for each of my books!

Zombie Turkey excerpts

Zombie Detective excerpts

My Undead Mother-in-law excerpts

Paranormal Privateer excerpts

Oops! excerpts

Secret Supers Excerpts

Villain’s Vacation Excerpts

Secret Supers in Space Excerpts

Welcome 2024 Pick Up More Gifts – Eleven Pipers Piping

This’ll be a different set of gifts. I love bagpipes. I have a Youtube category of them. So I’ll share my favorite bagpipe videos with you. Eleven of them!

March of Cambreadth

Amazing Grace with more than 200 bagpipes; live in Berlin

they said she couldn’t play BLUES on BAGPIPES…

Scotland the Brave India the Bold (Bagpipes) Official Music Video – The Snake Charmer ft. Poczy

Celtic-Indian Folk Music (Bagpipes & Bhangra) – Frantic Feathers (Toss the feathers)

Through the Fire and Flames (Official Video) – Mia x Ally

Scottish tribal pipes & drums band Clanadonia playing “Ya Bassa” during St Andrew’s Day event 2019


Red Hot Chilli Pipers – Thunderstruck – Wiesbaden 8.11.16

The Badpiper Thunderstruck

Monty Python and the Holy Grail Performed on Flaming Bagpipes and Unicycle in Portland, OR

Welcome 2024 Pick Up More Gifts – Twelve Drummers Drumming

I had so much fun with those eleven bagpipe videos from my Youtube collection, here are twelve drummer videos from my percussion collection!

Harry James and Buddy Rich – Cherokee 1964

” Autumn Leaves ” Chet Baker – Paul Desmond

“The Lion Sleeps Tonight” by Dover Steel Drum Band

best drumline video ever amazing

Joy in the Whirlwind’ for garklein recorder and percussion | by Melika Fitzhugh

TUBA SKINNY Go Craig and Robin go!

Gene Krupa “Sing, Sing, Sing” on The Ed Sullivan Show

Bugle Call Rag – Benny Goodman – 1936

the craziest drum solo ever

Caravan (Ellington) – Drum-Battle Charly Antolini, Wolfram Kellner, Paul Höchstädter, Thilo Wolf

Laurindo Almeida plays One Note Samba

Czardas – Trình tấu Đàn T’Rưng Việt Nam với tác phẩm Phương Tây

Pick Up More Gifts – Don’t Forget Your Free Book–Until January 9th

First an excerpt:

Welcome 2023

We arrived at the top. “Time to ship out the Supers.” Papa Smith hauled out Aubrey and Jeremy. I unloaded Kayla and Dan. We lined them up on the floor.

“It’d be so easy to eliminate them here.”

“Yes, Loretta, but the consequences will follow us. And there’s no money in it. Think of each of them as a billion dollars.”

“Nice idea, Papa.”

There’s four more gifts with this one!

You can get your free review copy by clicking here.

Get your discounted signed copy by clicking here. Free shipping from the author.

How about a free audiobook or two? Get your Secret Supers in Space by clicking here!! You might as well pick up your free Villain’s Vacation while you’re at it.

If you have any questions or comments for me, leave them here.

Buy any of my books directly from me at my store. Click here.

Or buy them from my Square site. Click here.

Finally, you can go to Amazon and get them.

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Meet Super Villains from Secret Supers in Space

Produce Your Audiobook Secret Supers in Space

Meet Super Villains from Secret Supers in Space. My book is .99 today and until March 24th. Get your copy by clicking here.

Why would international criminals target innocent, 7th-grade superheroes? I’ll tell you why, revealing their motives by excerpts from my book.

If you’re not familiar with my Secret Supers team, I tell you all about them here: Meet My Disabled Superheroes. For each heroic teen (or pre-teen), I’ll give you a description from my book.

First, you get the first description of Loretta.

Meet Super Villains – Loretta

A popup window appeared on my computer screen. “Loretta, do you wish to accept a video call from John Smith?” I read. I quickly clicked Accept.

As soon as a black-and-gray-haired man appeared on my computer screen, I said, “Oh, Papa Smith, I want to give up.”

“Why would you do that, Loretta? You’re one of the most successful children in our family business.”

“Bah! Four crummy kids beat me.”

“Well, yeah, but you didn’t know they were there in Maryville and they would come after your agent.”

“Sure, I knew they were there. They were all over the national news this past year.”

“But everyone just thinks they’re regular disabled kids. Heck, Andy Zach published their story as fiction. No one knew they had superpowers until we caught them on video defeating your agent.”

Meet Super Villains – Loretta – Part 2

“The telekinesis kid, Jeremy, is really powerful, but the telepathic pair, Kayla and Dan, can’t be stopped or intercepted. That’s before you add a real super girl, Aubrey. Their disabilities gave them the perfect disguises.”

“That’s an idea. What if we publish that video and tell everyone they have superpowers? The fame would disrupt their lives and maybe distract them so we can take over Maryville.”

“Hmmm. Maybe. But that would also point back to us as the source of the video. And people might think it’s just a deep fake.”

He sighed. “You’re right. The government might also enlist them in the NSA or some other secret agency. We don’t want any attention from them. Tell you what. Take a vacation. You haven’t had a break for a long time. Maybe if you do something completely different, you’ll come up with a solution to the Secret Supers.”

“There’s a good idea, Papa. My last one was in Paris? Three years ago?”

“Yes. That was after you successfully rigged that state election and got our candidate elected.”

“What would be a complete change for me? Something outside a city, something fun—I know!”

“What?”

“I’ll go to Coaster World!”

“That’s right. You always loved coasters as a kid.”


(See my book, Villain’s Vacation for more details.)

Meet Super Villains – Papa Smith

“Hi, Loretta. Are you all refreshed from your Paris vacation?”

“Hi, Papa Smith. Yes. I had a lot of fun waterskiing on the Riviera. I also cheated the casino in Monaco out of a million bucks.”

“Of course.”

 “But now I’m refreshed and bored. I haven’t had a job since I left for Coaster World.”

“I’m glad to hear you say that. I’ve got a challenging assignment for you—the Secret Supers.”

Meet Super Villains – Papa Smith, Part 2

“Ugh! I sure want to get back at them. But they’re backed up by the NSA. I’m not eager to tackle them and the US government.”

Papa stroked his hair. “The best cure for falling off a horse is to get back on. How about if I get a partner for you?”

“They’d better be awfully competent. I can’t really work with anyone who’s incompetent, or average, or merely a genius.”

“How about if you and I work together?”

I gasped. Papa Smith had raised me. He’d been very vague about what happened to my parents, so he was the only parent I’d known. I’d dreamt of working with him in the family crime business, but I hadn’t seen much of him once I went to college and began teaching, over fifty years ago. He was the one person I was pretty sure was smarter than me. Or at least he knew more.


Readers Speak About Secret Supers in Space

Great Elementary Super Read

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on March 21, 2023

4.0 out of 5 stars 

This book could stand on it’s own but in order with the series. Space camp at it’s finest… with an actual space adventure. These are definitely geared for elementary age kids on to about middle school readers. They are a clean fun read with kids with disabilities with powers but being pretty “normal” which I loved. I have a blind daughter and people constantly underestimate her and her abilities or assume she has other disabilities (mental, hearing etc.).

CuteAsADaisy

A Stellar Adventure with a Twist!

Reviewed in the United States 🇺🇸 on June 1, 2023

5.0 out of 5 stars 



Andy Zach’s writing takes flight in Secret Supers in Space, propelling disabled teen superheroes Jeremy, Aubrey, Dan, and Kayla into a cosmic summer adventure. Narrator Khai Lannor brings the characters’ energy and determination to life, making this audiobook an intergalactic joyride for fantasy fans of all ages. Buckle up and join the Secret Supers in their gravity-defying mission – this exhilarating journey is one you won’t want to miss!

Nemesis

Most children hate The dreaded assignment ‘what did you do in the summer holidays ‘ 

Author 2 books, 19 followers

June 26, 2023

I enjoyed this book. I have never been a space fan, so don’t know much about what goes into becoming an astronaut. That meant this book was a real eye opener and I got to do it with some great characters, who knows I might even be a fan of space now. I know the story is aimed at a younger generation but it was a lot of fun and each book I have listened to in this series has had an unusual plot, making it very different to the norm and that is before you find out that the four twelve year olds are disabled. The story isn’t that long but perfect for a trip into space (and a younger audience). Besides the author packs a lot into the story in an entertaining way that keeps you listening. I hope there are more adventures to come.

Julie Howard

Click Below to Get Your Copy!

Any newsletter subscriber gets free audiobook codes–as long as they last. Click here to get yours. Don’t wait until they’re gone!

Do you want an autographed book? I’ll mail it directly to you with free shipping and I pay the taxes! Click here to get yours. My shipping may not be the same day, but at least it’s free–for you.

Got questions? Comments? Reach me directly by clicking here. I’ll get back to you as quickly as I can.